Tough Love

Chapter One Hundred Twenty-Seven

A/N: Apologies for the long delay between updates. I've had an eye infection so I haven't been able to read or write anything recently. I'm so sorry! I hope you like the chapter and let me know what you think :)

Chapter One Hundred Twenty-Seven

Dani's P.O.V.

Once Eli leaves Sam's office, she asks, "How are things? Anything you'd like to talk about?"

I let out a deep breath and try to fight back the embarrassment of what my next words are going to be. If I don't just blurt them out, I will lose my nerve and I won't say them. Scar must must notice my discomfort, because he places his head in my lap and wags his tail at me. This dog is far too sweet. I love him already. I rest my hand on the top of his head and give him a scratch behind his ear.

Scar's presence gives me extra confidence, so I rush out, "I kissed Eli."

Sam looks slightly taken aback by my words, but then a huge smile forms on her face and she asks, "I'm proud of you. How do you feel about it?"

"So embarrassed."

"Really? Why?"

"Because that's not something I do. I'm not that person..."

"You love Eli, right?"

"Yes ma'am."

"And you trust him not to hurt you?"

I quietly reply, "As much as my mind and heart will allow me to right now."

"Good answer. You're not completely shutting out the prospect of fully trusting him in the future. You've experienced something extremely traumatic and I would be concerned if you just blindly trusted anyone. You shouldn't be embarrassed about being affectionate with Eli, or anyone else. I know you struggle with physical contact, but you shouldn't be embarrassed about finding it difficult or with actually initiating contact. Part of overcoming your fear is pushing the boundaries. Now, I'm not advocating going all out or anything, because I think that will be detrimental in the long run, but I do think you should push the boundaries as much as you're comfortable with. You need to know that not all touch is bad or causes you pain. Do you shake people's hands?"

I'm horrified at her words. That would mean touching people; people who aren't Eli. Even touching Eli is still a battle for me sometimes. I'm constantly fighting back the bad memories and trying to make new ones. I just need to figure out how to get rid of the bad ones, because they don't seem to be leaving my mind, even by creating new ones.

I notice I haven't answered Sam's question, so I quickly say, "No ma'am."

"Ok, so can we try a little experiment? I'd like for you to try shaking a few people's hands before I see you again. It doesn't have to be people you don't know. Maybe ask Ash and Ryan if they'd mind taking part? Could you try that?"