New Dawn

H o n e s t y

Only two days have passed since my family's memories were restored and Nahuel was put to death. I still feel numb to the world around me; I'm not able to fit back into my old niche I once loved dearly. I no longer felt a part of any world. In the many years apart from my family we have all changed and become different people then who we once were. Alice has become less forceful when it comes to shopping. Jasper relapsed and can't seem to control himself any longer. Rose is less selfish and has softened her heart to the life Grandpa created for her. Emmet is more of a jokester then ever. Grandma and Grandpa haven't changed as much and are still the most loving and caring people I have ever known but there was a distance between my family and I. Something was holding me back, preventing me from falling back into the normal routine I used to feel with them.

I watched as Jacob fiddled and cursed at the engine of Seth's new truck. A truck Seth bought without going through the appropriate precautions and, in return, the truck didn't run properly. Jacob was graceful with his movements as he helped his friend fix the old truck. I stood in amazement as his hands gripped and brushed alone the oily metal. My thoughts drifted into negativity as the realization that summer was coming to an end crept into my joyous haze. Water pooled in my eyes as I walked toward my once best friend.

"What's wrong?" Jacob was quick to feel the shift in my mood and immediately stopped his work. "Let's go inside and talk?"

"Okay." Tears had not yet fallen from my eyes and I quickly pushed back any that dared drip down my cheeks.

Jacob opened the door to his shop and looked back at me, offering me his hand. The day had fallen and the night air was beginning to get its winter chill. Quickly, I moved closer to Jacob and took up his hand in mine. The warmth of his body calmed my jumbled thoughts. He kissed my forehead, "I love you Ness. Everything is going to be just fine."

I buried my face in his chest; he always knew what I was thinking and the words I needed to hear. "Are you sure you can't come with me to school? Its my last year and its going to be terrible without you, I'm not strong enough." My words were muffled but he seemed to understand me.

"I'll come everyday and bring you lunch but people know I'm not in high school anymore. Plus, I know you want to finish school, give your friends a proper farewell, I would take away from that." He smiled and encouraged me to walk with him back into the house.

I reluctantly fallowed, bragging my feet as we made our way down the pathway. "I know you're right, I just feel like I didn't get enough time with you this summer. There is still so much we need to catch up on." I sighed, "Am I being silly?"

"Yes," he chuckled and kissed my forehead once again, "We have forever to catch up Nessie. I'm not going anywhere."

I smiled; I was being ridiculous. "I love you. I'm sorry I got sad; I just wanna spend all my time with you. Do you want me to make you some dinner?"

Jacob let out a booming laugh, "Never be sorry for wanting to spend time with me. And I'm starving," he licked his lips as we walked through the front door, " and I love your cooking."

"Okay but remember I can't stay. I have plans with Cassidy for dinner."

Jacobs face fell, "Do you think I'll get to see you again tonight?"

I smiled but knew that it was doubtful, "Maybe, I'll talk to my parents and see if you can stay over?"

Jacob's eye lit up. I had never offered for him to stay the night and we hadn't slept in the same bed sense the beginning of summer when we were trying to find my mother. I wanted things to go slow between the two of us. Yet, there was a part of me that believed my hesitation about starting a relationship with Jacob was derived from the feelings I had for Nahuel and the fear that his death was truy on my hands. Nontheless. I tried my hardest to keep away from that mind set and focus my attention on getting through the next year. Jacob and I had forever to be together; we might as well take our time. Sadly, I don't think that's what he had in mind but he was patient and always a gentleman.