apathy (sequel to fervor)

preғαce | woυɴdѕ..

   preғαce | woυɴdѕ..

The cool, fall air felt refreshing today. Fall was my absolute favorite time of the year, and it was inching close for Daylight Savings Time to end.

I was walking Monae home from school, but she wouldn't say anything to me. She was walking behind me, and I looked over my shoulder at her. "You didn't have to do that.." She whispered.

"I don't care," I growled.

Looking down at my fists, wiping the blood off onto my jeans. "He was just being nice.."

I stopped in my tracks, and felt her walk into me. I turned around to her, cutting my eyes. "That nigga was NOT being nice to you. I know what he wanted."

Ever since she's turned sixteen, I've been having to beat up plenty of little niggas who have tried to disrespect her. She's been getting more developed by the day, and I don't like to see boys stare at her like she's some piece of meat. Today, it was this boy at the gas station. Monae said that they went to school together, and walked her to all of her classes today.

It wasn't that which pissed me the fuck off, it was the way he looked at her, as if I couldn't see him staring at her ass.

"Ramiro, you treat me like I'm five!" She yelled at me, sighing. I pushed her hair out of her face, and rolled my eyes. "If you didn't hang around those boys, I wouldn't have to beat someone's ass."

"This is why mom and dad don't let you go to school with me. You always get so angry over the simplest things!"

"I wouldn't get angry if you knew how to act!"

Monae pushed me away, trying to walk away from me. I pulled her back by the arm, yanking her towards me. "Don't you get that fucking attitude with me!"

Monae pulled her arm out of my grip, standing back from me.

"Sometimes, you're a real bitch, you know that Ramiro?! I'm sixteen! You aren't mom, and you sure as hell aren't dad, he'd never treat me this way!"

"Because you're his little Princess! You get everything you fucking want from him, you spoiled brat! I'm just trying to keep you out of trouble, so I won't catch you in that position again!"

I had caught Monae and her stupid ex-boyfriend in her room, and it seemed like they were about to fuck by the way they were feeling on each other, something I wasn't having.

"I admit, I fucked up, Miro, but I'm not fourteen anymore! I'm sixteen, and I deserve to be treated like I'm that age! I don't need you down my back, Ramiro!"

I rubbed my temples. It was true, I wasn't allowed to go to public school with Monae, I was being homeschooled so Charles could teach me how to control my anger.

"Well stop whining like a little bitch, you slut."

Monae stopped, her mouth dropping open. I could see tears to form in her eyes, and I reached for her.

"I-I didn't mean th-that," I stuttered, "Monae-"

"I hate you!" Monae screamed, dropping her books and running past me. I called her name, trying to get her to stop. I ran after her, practically screaming her name.

Monae was fragile, just like our mother. I knew I shouldn't have said that to her..she's right, I do get furious over simple things.

She turned the corner, and I could feel my legs giving out. "Monae! Stop!"

"Leave me alone, Ramiro!" She yelled.

Suddenly, a black van pulled out from the alley, stopping Monae. Before I could reach her, someone wearing a black mask had grabbed her, pulling her into the van. She kicked her feet, and the person had pulled her in fully, closing the van door and speeding off.

I tried running after them, but they were too far ahead for me to catch up.

I stopped, and looked down. I was standing on something gold, and I picked it up, noticing that it was Monae's charm bracelet.

I could feel the hot tears stream down my cheeks, and I punched the brick wall in fury.

If I had never called her slut..

My fist felt numb and was covered in my own blood, and I hiccuped, dropping down to my knees.

"Fuck..fuck..FUCK!"

What am I going to tell mom and dad?

I picked myself up, wiping my runny nose with the sleeve of my jacket. I walked back to get Monae's bag, placing her binders in it.

I made the walk home alone, crying.

I opened the door, and was greeted by my mother, who hugged me.

"Baby, what's wrong? Where's Monae?"

She took her bag out of my hands, placing it on the couch. When she looked at me, I had started to cry again. "She's gone, Mommy!"

She rubbed my back, and I hugged her, sobbing into her chest. "What do you mean she's gone?" She cooed, making me look at her. She wiped my eyes with her thumbs, and I hiccuped.

"It's all my fault! She's gone!"

Her expression turned serious, and she called for my father.

"She's gone, baby? Where did she go?" She asked me.

"Monae's been kidnapped!"

And the expression on their faces completely changed into a look of utter horror.