𝐴𝑆𝑇𝐸𝑅𝐼𝑆𝑀; bts os

jjk : abience

summary: in which he regrets, too.

genre: angst, fluff

word count: + 1.7k

abience (noun); the strong urge to avoid someone or something.

inspired by: "if you" - big bang.

—

a sad sigh escaped my lips, as i looked out of the window. the world was drowning in clear whiteness. snowflakes fell from the greyish sky, covering the streets and buildings of seoul. the weather fit my depressed mood, and i sighed once again while checking my messages. "stupid jungkook.", i grumbled. he promised to be back at 5pm, and that was nearly three hours ago. the dish i cooked was long cold, the table i had set was empty. "he could at least have texted me early enough, then i wouldn't have cooked anything.", i mumbled to myself, glancing at my phone for a second time. still no message. "what are you even waiting for?", i thought and got up to take a decent shower. if he tried to contact me then, it was his bad luck, not mine. for some reason, i did not care anymore.

the shower was warm, calming and refreshing. wearing a small smile on my lips, i nuzzled into a blanket and switched on the tv, starting to watch one of my favorite tv series. time passed by fast, and before i knew it, i could hear the door opening, and the rustling of keys. a look at the clock told me it was 11:30pm. clearing my throat, i prepared for what was most likely to happen.

and indeed, jungkook stumbled into the living room, he obviously drank something. a sigh made its way from my throat. again. he wasn't a drinker, but he went out with his friends more often lately. too often for my liking. the ravenette ran a hand through his hair and looked at me with tired, out-worn eyes. "jagi, you're still awake?", he mumbled. "yeah.", i answered, not looking at him, before i got up and walked straight past him. "why are you like this now, (y/n)?", my boyfriend sighed and followed me. abruptly, i turned around, crossing my arms over my chest. "you really have the guts to ask me?! hey, remember you promised to be at home at 5pm? look at the clock, jungkook. it's freaking 11:40pm. i cooked and set the table, everything was ready, and you just decide to not show up! i was worried as well, but hey."

now he sighed annoyedly, and replied: "oh come on, (y/n), you know that i am fairly busy with training and business and what else. can't i just spend an evening with my friends?" "sure, an evening once a while, but not every day. i know that you're not away every day, but i rarely get to see you. you're either busy with work or going out with your friends, come home at ungodly times and such. you even missed out on our 3rd anniversary and still didn't apologize truthfully.", i answered, my voice raising with the last sentences.

i saw my boyfriend's eyes darkening with anger and he ruffled his hair in a frustrated way. "you honestly don't seem to understand, (y/n). can't be you a loving and caring girlfriend for once in a while?!", he yelled, causing me to flinch. it wasn't the first time we argued like this, but this comment hurt me more than everything before. just as i was about to reply, i saw something that made me gasp, my eyes glistening with unshead tears.

"is that a hickey?" silence. "don't you tell me you fucking made out with some girl?!", i whisper-yelled. one part of me wanted him to cry, to regret what he had done, but jungkook said nothing, gaze focused on the ground below him.

"that's it.", i choked.

"you can sleep on the sofa this night, i will be gone by the day of tomorrow. i don't want to see you anymore." "(y/n), please, i can explain.", he started, only for me to shush the ravenette with an icy yet broken glare. "i don't want to hear it jungkook. who knows, probably it's not the first time you did that and i was so stupid and naive to fall for you."