Trust Me, I'm Lying|| Eric Coulter

Amazing Grace

Zarah's POV:
It's been years since I've last felt this. Since I've actually felt anything close to this. I feel like a child once again. Like all the pain has faded away and all I care about is the happiness.
Ken is highly tolerable and isn't being a drama queen. Eric is quite and actually really caring. And I have my precious baby sister with me in my arms once again. Everything is perfect. I've found one of the pieces that I lost years ago.
And all it took was an old lullaby.
I let out a sigh of relaxation as I take the time out of waking to reminisce. To the days where all I felt was happiness and I had no clue what pain or sadness. Back to the days when my father still held me in his arms.
"Well that was gay. Only a little bitch sings love dovey songs" Eric pipes up ruining this perfect moment.
I guess I jinxed it. Either that or it's just karma and she's a real bitch. And just like that my happy moment turned into a world war between these two fully grown idiots. I don't pay attention to their stupid argument because I know that if I put my 2 cents in everything will burn to the ground.
Instead I concentrate on Lauryn. Happiness and fear is written all over her face.
If I don't at something she'll get scared. I'm doing this for you my princess.
"Shut up!" I snap silencing the both of them "You two have been talking like this for the past 11 blocks. For a while I had a loving Ken and a highly tolerable Eric" my heart fills with pain for some unknown reason that makes me feel sad.
"He started it" Ken points at Eric in order to save himself from a harsh scolding he knows he'll recur eventually.
"Shut it!" I scream scaring everyone and myself in the process "Suddenly it was just like 'you have feelings' 'you're gay' 'no you're gay' are you two 8?" I give them the chance to give me a proper answer.
A silence falls amongst us and my heart starts pumping faster and faster out of anger and disappointment.
I swear if one of them gives me a stupid answer I'm out.
"He is" Eric points at Ken with a scared tone of voice and a hint of fear in his eyes.
"That's it I'm out. Either you two grow up or you can head back to Dauntless tonight" with that I grab the bag of clothes out of Kens grasp and storm off with Lauryn in my arms.
These stupid idiots are the train why I don't want to ever have a son. Ken has tried so hard to show me why boys are awesome, but at this very moment his argument has been rendered useless. If there were no men in the whole world it would be so much better. Women are highly capable of surviving without those stupid dick sucking tiny brain retards.
Ugh it was so nice until that idiot opened his mouth. There's a reason he left Erudite and it's because he's so fucking stupid. I'm getting my tubes tied so I don't have to carry that idiots kids.
Woah hold up carry his kids? Zarah he ain't your boy toy calm the heck down sweetie.
I've been walking for so long that I don't even realise where I am. I take the time to look around and my heart stops at the sight of a familiar headstone. I'd been sling for so long so ended up strolling into the graveyard.
Giving Lauryn the chance to walk around I stand rooted to the ground too afraid to take another step. I never visited my father as brothers grave after their funerals.
In my heart they were still very much alive. And seeing their graves told me that they weren't here, and that's one thing I don't want to accept. I'm still waiting for my father to come and save me. I'm still waiting for my brother to forgive me for what I've done.
Dropping myself on the ground beside their graves I start clearing away the weeds that have over take their headstone.
-Flashback-
"Hey Angel" my father says with calmness in his voice.
His eyes are bloodshot and his face is run down and unshaven. I giggle and run my fingers over the stumble on his face sending a tingling sensation within my fingertips. 
"Hi daddy" I smile.
"I need you to promise me something okay?" His voice shakes as he squeezes my hands tightly but makes sure that he isn't hurting me in the process.
"Why?"
"Daddy's very sick honey. Do you promise me you'll do what daddy asks you?"
"Pinky promise" I hold out my pinky and lock it with his.
"I need you to take care of your brothers and your mother for me. Can you do that for me?"
"Yes" I giggle.
"Whenever you feel lonely just look up at the evening star and know that someone will always be looking right at you"
"Okay"
"Remember you are mine. You will always be mine and mine alone. It doesn't matter where you go or what people say about you because you'll always be my daughter" he embraces me with a strong hug the strong scent if whiskey an bourbon lingering off of his skin and his clothes. 
The sound of a clicking from behind me frightens my very senses.
"Daddy you're scaring me" I cry hugging him tightly and praying that he won't let go.
"Don't be afraid Angel. Never be afraid" he whispers.
My shirt is damp from water but the tears do not belong to me. In all my years I've never seen my father cry and at this very moment my hero is crying and au must stay strong for him.
"Be a tough girl?"
"That's right Angel a tough girl. I love you so much Zarah" I sighs as he hugs me tighter almost suffocating me. 
"I love you too daddy" I laugh burying my face into his chest.
A loud bang fills my ears, but it doesn't frighten me. I try to get my father to hug me tighter, but he doesn't. His grip loosens and he falls to the ground.
I tug at his shirt thinking thy he's fallen asleep, but he doesn't wake up.  Surrounding his body is a pool of crimson blood.
"Daddy wake up you look silly" I laugh pointing at the hole on the left side of his temple.
-Present-
I was too young to know that my father killed himself. Perhaps if I was older I would've been able to stop him. Whenever I look back it I die a little inside. I played with my fathers dead body like he was sleeping instead of getting help I stayed.
He was going to die eventually. But being so young and innocent I was unsure about what was going on around me. My father was dying from Parkinson's Disease. Every single day he was dying, but he always kept a big smile on my face so I wouldn't worry about him.
If I wasn't so young and stupid I would've done everything differently. I wouldn't have woken him up in the middle of the night just so we could go and look at the stars. I wouldn't have made him fight for me and be more damaged than he already was. And I definitely would've stopped him from pulling the trigger.
A big strong hand squeezes mine and pulls me out of my deep thoughts. I turn my head to see the man who is holding my hands. His eyes melt my soul in an instance sending cold shivers down my spine. Eric.
"You're crying" he says wiping the tears from my eyes.
I was in such a deep train of thought I didn't notice the waterfalls rushing down my eyes.
"Don't look at me" I try to look away but he holds my face still so that I'm looking at him and only him. 
His next move confused me and leaves me speechless. Pulling me into a hug he starts humming a tune that I thought I may never thought I'd ever hear again. I don't know how Eric knows it, and in truth I don't care.
It's a song my father use to sing to me whenever I was too afraid to close my eyes at night called 'Dream a little dream of me'. The songs both pains me and calms me at the same time.
And for that one moment I actually don't mind Eric's kindness. Because for once it doesn't feel like an act. He actually seems like he genuinely cares.
**
"Mum!" Ken and I scream as we embrace our mother in a tight hug.
She giggles out of happiness as she plants a kiss on each of our cheeks. Eric just stands in the background hiding any emotion that he'll never have. Ya know because he's a robot and he's unable to feel anything. 
The smell of sandalwood and fresh mint lingers off of my mothers skin bringing back happy memories.
She gives me a confused look before looking at Eric who's is still expressionless.
"Who's this handsome young man?" She asks her voice filled with curiosity and excitement.
Its been a while since I last brought a boy home. The fact that Eric is here will make my mother think of the most cheesiest stuff. Or the worse.
"Oh mum this is Eric he's my....." I struggle to give him a title but Ken saves me.
"He's her boyfriend" chuckles as he elbows Eric in the ribs.
The once blank expression written on his face is changed to the expression of pure anger. If looks could kill Ken would be in a puddle of his own blood. He looks as though he wants to beat up Len but not as badly as I want to hurt Ken.
"Really?" My mum gasps as a smile curves on her lips.
Seriously mum? You really want this robot to be your son in law? And they told me I had bad taste in men.
"No he's not. Shut up you wanker!" I snap punching Ken in the shoulder.
Eric just laughs quietly to himself taking in everything that's happening.
"I knew I smelt dumbass. What are you doing here?" A small visible days from behind me.
"Didn't you see the sign that said no ugly people allowed?" Another one asks.
Turing around to find the owners of the two spectate voices a smile curves on my lips at the sight of the two demons that are stationed before me. 
"Then you shouldn't be here either" Kens time of voice change from and bubbly to annoyed and superior. Basically Eric mode.
Ken suffers from something that all of the oldest siblings suffer from. The older child syndrome. Since he's the oldest he doesn't want anyone to forget that he is. This means he becomes a huge asshole. Making us feel stupid and also forever getting mad at us for the stupidest things.
Thankfully mum puts a stop to all of his asholeness by beating the shit out of him.
"Eric theses are my sisters Grace and Tammy Lee" giggle as I embrace my sisters in a strong hug.
"Which one did you name?" He asks playfully.
"Huh?"
"These are the kind of names 13 year olds come up with. Which one was it?"
"Grace" My face turns red out of embarrassment.
I got the name Grace from the song Amazing Grace. When my mum announced that she was pregnant thins song was playing. I think. I after all these years can't keep track.
"We have allot to catch up on" my mum whispers into my ear as she  pulls me alongside her. 
"Eric make yourself at home" I giggle giving him a reassuring smile.
His face grows cold and his eyes turn a piercing bright blue. For a second it looks like he's scared, but he immediately he's I'd of any sort of emotion that is humanly possible.
Sucker these girls are gonna fucking murder you.
"Don't be scared of them. They're only kids they won't bite....hard" I whisper into his ear and shove him into the pit of hell where he belongs.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eric's POV:
"Turn the TV down" Ken calls from his bedroom.
I can say with absolute certainty that I hate this place. Fuck why did I choose to follow this dumb bitch anyways? This place sucks literally. I thought by meeting her family I'd get a one way ticket to pleasure town but right now I'm boarding the train to blue balls vile. I haven't chucked a wank since yesterday I'm so close to discharging right now.
I look at Grace as she immediately mutes the TV.  Her face is expressionless almost as though she's pondering over who to murder first. She's so quiet that it creates a chilly type of atmosphere within the room.
"Why'd you mute it?" I ask out of curiosity.
"Wait" is all she says.
She gives me the most deadliest look making my stomach turn. For all I know she's probable trying to figure out how she's going to kill me. She's just like Wednesday Adams. Quiet but deadly. In a way she reminds me of me. And if I know myself as well as I hope I should then I can say with absolute certainty that she's a little bitch.
"Didn't I say turn that TV down?!" Ken snaps throwing the tea towel that he held in his hand on her face.
Gripping the tea towel tightly within her grasp I see the anger in her eyes as she approaches her brother. She holds each end of the towel  and begins twirling it until it's a thin whip. Her hard tremble uncontrollably as she struggles to control her anger. 
"There is no sound coming out of the TV" she grits between her teeth.
With that being said she charges towards her brother and flings the towel across his face causing a red mark to immediately appear. He tries to hit her but she punches him in the throat leaving him breathless. I watch as Ken grips at his throat struggling to catch his breath as he falls to the ground. She goes to hit him again but I reach out to stop her.
"Beaten by your little sister? Come on Ken" I laugh looking at the still breathless Kendrick.
She pushes my hand off of her shoulder and returns to her previous sitting place. Crossing her left leg across her right leg she rest her head on her left hand almost as thou she's studying me. There's a sadistic look in her eyes as she scans me from head to toe.
"Do you like our sister?" She asks after the long profound silence.
"Is she pregnant?" Tammy Lee chirps in.
"What?" I ask completely dumbfounded by their questions.
I don know how young these kids are but I want to punch them in the face for asking such personal questions.
"Zarah never brings boys around mostly because she's scary" Grace laughs.
Her laugh doesn't sound cute thou it's almost psychotic. Almost like she knows the trains her sister never brought boys home. Do they make it home? What happened to them? So many questions that could only be answered by this tiny maniac.
"She brought Blake home"
"He doesn't count he's dead" Her monotone voice making me feel like she had something to do with his death.
"Thaddeus?"
"He's our brother that still doesn't count. Unless she's into incest then yea that counts"
Incest? How old are these kids?
"Did she force you to have sex with her? That explains why she would be pregnant" Tammy says excitedly almost like she's solving the hardest case in history.
The questions cause my blood to boil and my head begins to heat up out of anger. I've never been a fan of kids mostly because they're so fucking annoying.  Thank god I was never one.
"You're really scary looking. I bet you've never slept with a girl before" Gracie says with a blank face making the both of them giggle like a pair of hyenas. 
"Are you stupid? you look stupid" they both say at the same time.
If I hit one the other will fall too. Like dominos. Just hit the loud one in the face hard enough to knock her out so she can't scream for help. 
"Gracie. Tam mum's calling you two. Go outside and help her" Zarah walks into the room startling all of us.
"But we wh-"
"Do you want a hiding?" She snaps cutting the two of then off.
Her green eyes turn cold creating a cold and unwelcoming atmosphere within the room. Zarah's hands clench together like she's preparing for a fight which frightens both of the girls.
"No" Tammy Lee replies her voice trembling with fear.
Fear but why? Is there something that Zarah isn't telling me, still. There has to be a reason that these girls fear her. Their eyes are as terrified as a deer staring into the headlights of a car.   
"Then go outside and help mum" she hisses and points her finger in the direction of the back door.
"Wow that was just" I laugh still unsure of what just happened.
"I'm not going to apologise about them. You deserved all of that" her lips pulls into a proud smile.
"I guess it's a family thing to piss people off huh?" I reply containing myself from lashing out at her.
One wrong move and I'll slam her far into the wall. Don't get me wrong she's a 10, but that fucking mouth on her has to go. Either she stops it with her smart mouth or I'll shut her up for good.
"It's a Candor thing honey don't take it personally" she laughs and leaves me alone with my thoughts.
You wait sweetheart I'm gonna change you wether you like it or not.