Skin to Skin

Chapter 38

When Castiel woke up to the sound of his alarm clock Dean was still there. Sleeping beside him in his usual awkward position and his cell phone in his hand. He quickly nudged Dean's shoulder, trying to wake the other man up. "Baby, baby, you're late for work." Dean muttered something in his sleep that was inaudible. "What? I don't understand?" Castiel leaned into him, attempting to understand the incoherent words. "Don't have to... told me doctors." Castiel sat back. Hmm, maybe his Sergeant said he needs to get checked out? "Well then you still need to get up so you can go to the doctors." Dean blinked green eyes open, cloudy with sleep and confusion. "What?" Castiel smiled slightly, this was adorable as fuck. Dean's hair stuck up everywhere, lips parted and his voice thick with exhaustion. "You need to go to the doctors?" Dean nodded in acknowledgement and let his head drop back down on the pillow. "Yea, yea in a little bit. I'm tired." Castiel groaned and pulled the blanket off Dean, it was like trying to wake up a five year old. "Baby, come on." Dean sighed and sat up slowly, clutching at his side as he did. "Fine, fine. What are you my mother?" Castiel chuckled and gave him a peck on the lips. "Want me to pick out your clothes?" Dean stood up with a groan and Castiel could see the bruises standing out harshly against his tan skin, the morning glow high lighting them. "No, I got it. Just get me a glass of water baby." Castiel grabbed a solo cup and ran to the bathroom to fill it up before handing it to Dean. "You're gonna go to the doctor right?" Dean gulped the water down and threw the cup away. "I gotta if I want to work. Just let me wake up and get dressed first." Castiel shrugged on a pair of black capris and a blue and white striped shirt. Dean eyed him up and down. "It's just the doctors, Cassy. Not a fashion show." Castiel sighed and opened his closest door, revealing all the other sensible outfits. "I don't have much by way of regular clothing." Dean laughed and pulled his jeans up over his bowed legs. "Such a fashionista."
Dean stared at the white pill in his hand and Castiel sighed. "Dean staring at the pill is not going to make it go away." "Shut up." Dean threw his head back and swallowed the pill, it left a bitter taste on his tongue and he coughed. "Alright let's go." He shrugged his jacket on and grabbed his car keys. "You're not going to make an appointment?" "What? No, walk in clinic. I don't have time to wait days for a scheduled one." Castiel nodded and slipped into his own dark blue jacket that matched the little outfit he was wearing. "I always feel underdressed next to you." Castiel blushed and Dean pinched his red cheek. "Stop that." He swatted away Dean's hand. "You're going to bruise my face." Dean scoffed at Castiel's statement and opened the door. "You are not that delicate." The smaller man rubbed his face and smiled coyly. "You never know."
~*~
When they got to the clinic Dean hesitated about going inside. The last time he went to one of these was to treat a broken collar bone because of his father. His anxiety was creeping up on him and it was making him feel sick to his stomach. Castiel came to his side and squeezed his hand. "What's wrong?" Dean shook his head. He didn't really want to talk about it even if it was at the forefront of his mind. "Nothing...it's just been awhile." Castiel kissed the back of his hand, the other man's soft lips soothed his nerves a bit. "You'll probably just get an x-ray and some pain killers. Don't worry." Dean nodded. He knows that, it's just hard to not think about other things. They went inside and there wasn't that many other people waiting. He signed in on the sheet and they sat down, waiting for his name to be called. Dean fidgeted with the collar of his jacket, it kept popping up and rubbing his neck. Eventually he just took it off, with alot more force than necessary, and shoved into the seat beside him. "Dean, calm down baby. It's going to be fine." Dean sighed and carded his fingers through his hair. "I know, I know. I just really hate the doctors."The waiting room was quiet, unbelievably quiet and the fluorescent lights highlighted every god forsaken thing in it. Dean tried to tune out the sniffles, the coughs, the random clearing of people's throats but he couldn't. It was making his skin crawl, making his anxiety scratch away at the fragile and already flustered mask he was trying to maintain. Castiel kept glancing over at Dean, blue eyes full of worry and concern as his own green eyes darted around, trying to find something to focus on. "Winchester." Dean shot up, pulling Castiel up by the arm a little roughly. "Finally." "Dean." He let go of Castiel's wrist and the smaller man rubbed it gingerly. "Sorry.." They followed the nurse to a small room through two double doors that had a magnet lock on it. "Take off your jacket." Dean took off his jacket and the nurse sighed. "Take off the flannel and the overshirt." Castiel giggled and Dean shot him a stern look. "What?" The nurse checked Dean's blood pressure, listened to his heart beat and breathing then wrote down the numbers. "So what are you here for today?" Dean cleared his throat, he was having trouble talking through the anxiety when he spotted  sterile needles in a jar. "Umm..broken ribs. Uh actually, I just need a written note saying I can go back to work." The nurse lifted Dean's shirt and made a tsk noise when she saw the bruising. "A note, huh? Yea not happening till we get those x-rayed." Dean sighed and Castiel squeezed his hand reassuringly. "Okay. How long till I can get back there? Till we get the results?" The nurse smiled warmly, showing the first signs of her actually being human. "I would have your pretty boy make a food run. You're going to be here awhile." "Okay, thanks." The nurse left, the door clicking softly behind her."Pretty boy, hm?" Castiel giggled without a single note of modesty. "I guess your pretty, I wouldn't know." Castiel pushed Dean a little and he tried to hide the wince of pain from his ribs."I'm sorry." "It's okay baby." He pulled Castiel to him, resting his head on the smaller man's shoulder. "Go get us some food, okay?" Castiel frowned."Will you be alright?" Dean nodded, he didn't even attempt a fake smile."Yea."
Dean sat in the small room by himself, wringing his hands, checking the time on his phone. He stood up and went through the gores, the cabinets. Nothing of interest. He looked at the time. Again. For the third time now. Dean sighed and paced the small area between the exam table and the door leading to the hallway. Why did he tell Castiel to leave? He fidgeted with his jeans, the fabric kept getting caught under his boot when he walked and he could feel it. Just another thing to add to the list of things putting him on edge. The fluorescent light above him kept flickering and making this ticking noise like it was about to die so he flipped the switch and turned it off. He sat down on the corner of the exam table, in the dark and in the surrounding silence his mind kept replaying the same memory over and over again. Dean's uncle Bobby rushed him to the emergency room, his obviously shattered collar bone had swollen so bad it was affecting his breathing. He remembered the pain being so intense he couldn't stay conscious. He kept fading in and out. At one point a nurse was in his face asking him who did this but he couldn't or wouldn't answer. Then he woke up, one IV supplying steroids, another supplying nutrition to the obviously malnourished child. His father walked through the door, demanding Dean to tell him everything he told the doctors but he couldn't speak, he was just a terrified little boy. He had never been to the doctors, nonetheless a hospital before. Dean blinked and the light was on and when his eyes slowly readjusted he realized Castiel was already back. How long had he been stuck in that memory loop? "Are you okay?" Dean couldn't speak, the fear from his memory still overwhelming him. He shook his head and a single tear fell from one of his eyes. He brushed it off and pulled Castiel against him, crushing the food between them. He just needed to feel safe, even if it was just for a moment.