Oh yeah? Then why did you choose Lee Byunghun over me?”.
Ricky stared at the girl with disbelief in his eyes. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. Maybe... he had heard it all wrong? Yes, that must be it. He had heard it wrong. But then... why did she look so hurt and so fragile? She looked as if she had just revealed a big secret that had haunted her for a long period of time.
Ricky didn't know what to respond to that. There was nothing he could say that would take the pain away from her, nor would it make her happier. If it had been two months ago, he could answer that question without a single doubt. He would've let Eunhee know that what he was feeling towards L.Joe was nothing but a friendship. But now... he honestly had no idea what to answer her.
“Eunhee-yah”, he started with a low voice and reached for her hand. He had no idea what he was doing nor why he was doing what he was doing. It was an unconscious feeling inside of him that told him what to do.
“It wasn't a choice I made. If it was, then I without a doubt would've chosen you. I can't control my feelings towards him and it drives me crazy”.
The crack in his voice at the end of the sentence made Eunhee shiver, because she could relate in what Ricky was telling her. Even though it was clear that she didn't want to. Ricky squeezed her hand and noticed how his sight turned slightly blurry.
“You love him... don't you?”, Eunhee whispered with a soft voice and gave Ricky a small, yet gentle smile.
A blush appeared over his cheeks and he looked away. Even though what she had said was more of a statement than a question, it had startled him. But hearing it made Ricky realize that maybe that was what felt for L.Joe. Love.
“I guess I... have to let go of you, Ricky”, Eunhee sighed suddenly and let go of Ricky's hand. Her face was pale and her eyes gossiped that she at any time would burst out in tears. But there was also a knowledge inside of the shiny eyes. She knew that Ricky would never look at her the way he looked at L.Joe.
And what came like another surprise, was when she smiled and looked down at his books. Ricky saw how she ran the back of her hand against her nose and then looked back at him.
“Let's study hard till lunch, arasso?”, Eunhee suggested with a friendly voice.
When the two had studied for another hour and helped each other out with whatever they needed help with. In Ricky's case, it was English. When getting a few pointers on how to improve and memorize the different words that was rather difficult in Ricky's opinion, it felt a little like he was betraying his L.Joe who had lived in the States for such a long time.
Eunhee stretched out her arms in the air and made a little grunt. Ricky chuckled and leaned back in the chair.
“Sick of helping this retard already?”, Ricky chuckled and nervously scratched the back of his head in a gesture of pure innocence.
Eunhee rolled her eyes and shook her head. “You're not a retard, Ricky-yah. Everyone has their areas in where they find things difficult. But I know how you feel, I've been there too. You just... need to encourage yourself and believe in yourself”.
The soft words that Eunhee said brought a smile over his lips and he nodded. She was right, if he believed in himself, then he could do it.
“Arasso Eunhee seongsaengnim”, Ricky teased and giggled. “Yah, I'm starving. Let's get lunch”.
