Probitas | jicheol & meanie•

56 [special .7]

"HYUNG, hinay-hinay lang. Kanina ka pa natungga jan."

Magha-hating gabi na at nasa iisang lugar pa rin sila Seungcheol at Hoshi. The nightclub; dimmed atmosphere, different lights playing around, loud cacophonous music. They were both occupying a whole table, and nobody dared to ask if they could sit in with them. Seungcheol should've been alone if Hoshi wasn't there. And how Hoshi got there was easy.

Just when he was about to follow Jihoon into the place he was talking about, the little guy already shooed him off. (Yep he knew Hoshi was following him.) And at the same time, tumawag sa kanya si Josh, telling him to follow this drunk lad instead. Nung una, naguguluhan si Hosh kasi bakit hindi na lang si Jeonghan? But Josh said siya daw yung pinakamalapit.

Tch, reasons. Ang sabihin niyo tinatamad na naman 'yon si Hannie. Baka kung saan saan na naman natutulog 'yon, while his bestfriend is out drinking his heart out.

If he still had a 'heart'. I'm afraid it's broken into pieces.

So which piece is he going to follow?

Lakas maka-teleserye kingina.

So back to Seungcheol drinking.

"D'you happen to know how it feels? Seeing the guy you loved for like God knows how many years, sharing something that the two of you should be doing?" Ayan na nag-english na siya, Hoshi. Kabahan ka na. Sisindakin ka ni barbacheol.

Sigh. Funny how it always happens to his hyung when he's drunk. Slurred words? Sometimes. But he was never the childish guy when he's in contact with alcohol. Cliché as it may seem. (Hinga, Hosh.)

Bihira lang uminom si Seungcheol. Iinom lang yan ng nakakalasing na tubig kung may problema yan. At ang problema lang naman sa buhay niyan ay si Wonwoo. Mga ginagawa ni Wonwoo, mga hindi tamang naka'y Wonwoo, mga problema ni Wonwoo ay problema niya na rin. Ang dami-dami, pero puro Wonwoo. His heart and mind even screams the name Jeon Wonwoo.

Kaya naiintindihan ni Hoshi kung gaano kahirap ang sitwasyon ng hyung niya ngayon. Hindi pa naman siya na-iinlove pero, duh, sa dinami-dami ng kinuwento ni Seokmin sa kanya, kulang na lang gawin siyang diary non.

Pero hindi naman siya magrereklamo.

Deputa, jicheol 'to. Enebe.

"Hyung, I don't know how it feels but I can imagine how it feels." Fruita, go Kwon Hosheh! Go go go. "Pero kung ako ang nasa sitwasyon mo, hindi ko sisirain ang sarili ko ng tuluyan. I know alcohol dissipates the pain for a while as you're making contact with it, pero kinabukasan babalik at babalik din sa'yo ang nangyare. Wala ring bisa bes nagpapakalasing ka lang. If you want to forget the pain, don't choose this option. Focus on bettering yourself. Siguro kung iniisip mong hindi ka enough, make yourself enough. Enough to handle the pain and forget him na."

Pero kingina hindi pa kumbinsido si Cheol-hyung niya. Iniling lang nito ang ulo niya't nagsimula na naman magsalita.

"No. No no no. No. NO. nO!!!!" Isang no na lang ibubuhos ko na sa kanya 'tong natitirang laman ng bote. Ibabalibag ko pa.

"You don't know how it feels." Akusa nito sa kanya. Sorry ha? Loveless ako eh. Shut up na lang tayo hosheh. talo tayo dito.

"Minahal ko naman siya diba? Sobra sobra pa nga. I never cheated, I never lied, I never looked at anybody else. But I know I might've have hurt him a couple of times pero para naman sa relasyon namin 'yon. I don't want to risk our relationship kaya palagi kong pinapaalala sa kanya na akin siya. Deal with the consequences of loving me and allowing me to love you. That was so damn easy bakit hindi niya makuha?! Was I not enough?" Naibagsak na nito ang pang-pitong baso. Juskulord magkano na ba ang babayaran ng hyung niya ngayon?