Paper Airplane [s.m]

Seventeen

I woke up this morning feeling like death itself. I have no idea why. I didn't even stay up that late. I'm in class now in the process of taking my test. It's impossible and all I want to do it sleep.

"Hey wants the answer to 15." Thalia asks leaning over to my desk.

"I haven't even gotten to number 5 Thalia." I tell her without looking up. She pouts and gets back to her test.

I pull out my phone and I'm about to text Shawn before my phone is snatched from my hands. I look up in anger ready to yell at Thalia or Reggie. The teacher stands above me with a glare.

"I'll have to call your parents, toss your test in the bin." She says. Aunt June is going to be pissed. I get up and throw my test away before leaving the class. I'm not staying in class if I can't do anything. There's no point in trying to get my phone back either.

I go to the main office and just sit down. They give me strange looks but I don't respond to them. Eventually the bell rings and I leave to my next class. By lunch time I'm ready to go home.

They probably already called my aunt so I'll definitely get yelled at when I go home. I was always a good student in Arizona. I don't know what's wrong this year. I lack motivation and patience.

"Roni are you okay?" Alex asks.

"Yeah just thinking I guess." I say staring out the window. She nods slowly and jumps into the conversation at our table. I hear them say Shawn's name and my head snaps over. They all look at me and start laughing really hard.

"Told you." Jade says as Reggie hands her 10 dollars.

"What?" I question with a confused expression.

"You were really distracted, so Jade said that if we said Shawn's name you'd pay attention." Alex exclaims with a smile from laughing. I frown and look away.

"Guys she can't help if she's in love with someone." Thalia says quietly.

"I heard that and I'm not in love with him, I just got out of a relationship." I roll my eyes.

"That doesn't mean anything." Thalia argues.

"I heard that Shawn's been talking to a new girl." Reggie says to the group, excluding me. I know they're just trying to get under my skin.

"What do you mean?" Thalia asks him.

"Like she texted him one day and they continued talking." Reggie explains.

"How would this girl even get his number?" I ask with a bored expression. I don't believe a word coming out of their mouths.

"I guess it was a wrong number? I don't know but they kept things going. It started just yesterday though." Reggie says.

"And how do you know this?" I ask him.

"The paparazzi know everything." He says as if it's a secret.

"Okay." I sarcastically say and roll my eyes.

"It's true! If you don't believe me you should ask Shawn." He tells me.

"Fine I will. Right after school I'll ask him. While we are on the roof so that you're there to hear his denial." I tell them.

I go right to the roof on the way home because I'm not ready to face my aunt yet. We all sit down at the table from my birthday party thing. It wasn't really a party but I guess you could consider it one because it was for my birthday.

Anyways, we sit down and I go to pull out my phone, but remember my teacher took it away. They all stare at me waiting for me to call Shawn.

"I got my phone taken away. Someone will have to invite him here." I tell them.

Alex calls Shawn and tells him to come to the roof. After a half hour of laughing at random stuff, he arrives. He smiles at me and I stand to greet him.

"Hey Shawn I have a question." I say getting straight to the point.

"Okay what is it?" He asks, curiously.

I suddenly don't know how to ask. What if I come off as jealous or intimidating somehow? I just want to find out. What if he thinks I was stalking him? After a few seconds of awkward silence I blurt it out.

"Are you seeing anyone?" I say and hold my breath.

"Um yeah I guess." He chuckles.

I try to respond but somehow I can't breathe. I open my mouth to speak but I only let out a strangled gasp. I don't know what's wrong with me. I didn't expect him to say yes. Why do I care so much?

I look around for a few seconds before smiling and walking to the elevator without saying goodbye. I stare blankly at the elevator buttons as it descends to my floor.

He must think I'm an idiot. I just made a fool of myself. I expected him to laugh and say no. I wanted him to tease my friends about believing what they read online. Why am I so bothered by this??

I walk into my apartment and see my aunt looking angrily at me. I take one look at her and her expression softens.

"What's wrong Roni?" She asks.

"Nothing." I mumble and go to my room.

I sit at my desk spinning in my chair for a while. My friends can't call me and they don't come to the apartment. Aunt June and Daisy leave me alone so I'm in complete silence for a long time.

I pick up my drawing journal out of boredom. I start to sketch what looks like an eye. It looks nice so I continue to draw. I draw another eye and a nose. The shading is really good, I'm impressed. I start to draw the lips and for some reason they look familiar. I draw a head around the face. I then shade in the cheekbones and places where a shadow would be. I finish by drawing the hair and take a long look at my drawing. It's one of my best drawings I've ever done.

And one other little thing. It's Shawn. I drew Shawn.

What is wrong with me?