Too far gone

One Chance

--- Jimmy's POV ---

"Here, lay back..."
So, head injuries are fun. With as messed up as my brain is already, I doubt a head injury is going to help any. A concussion, that's what everyone was saying. I don't really know what those are, but on those crime shows I watched, a few guys got them when they ran from the police. Heh, it made them look stupid. All wobbly and sensitive to anything and everything... I guess it's my turn now... except I got it from trying to be a dumb hero. I'd much rather get one under any other circumstance. But no. This is what I was stuck with.

"Does that feel any better?" This nurse was trying to help me feel better, but failing miserably. I don't know how much she knows about these things, but it doesn't seem like much. Why? Well for one, she has me laying on my back. Not a bad thing, right? Y'know, except for the fact that NOW IM STARING STRAIGHT AT THE LIGHTS!! I sighed, even with my eyes closed the lights were burning holes into my brain. "What's wrong?" She really wasn't getting this... I tried to speak again, but I'm not sure how clear it was to her. She only got up and walked away. I figured she'd just gotten frustrated and walked away, but after a few moments, the lights went out and a small, dim light in the corner turned on. I opened my eyes abit, just to see what's happened. And when the nurse walked back over, I'd realized this was the same nurse that was here when I was still around. In my own body. I don't know why I expected someone else, but...

"Better now?" I nodded, immediately regretting the motion. She sighed, "You really should just lay still. Your grandparents are on their way to pick you up, they said they would be a while though." I made some kind of noise to show that I registered what she said, though I'm not sure she took it that way. She got up and seemed to walk out of the room.

After what seemed like hours, my grandparents came and took me home. My grandmother was being annoying like she always was, asking me thousands of questions, all mainly asking, 'what happened,' 'who did this,' or 'How do you feel?.' I just pretended I was asleep after a while and she seemed to buy it. My grandfather, he was silent, he probably knew she was annoying me, even though he didn't know it was me and not his precious Ghosty...

It made me think though... do they ever think of me? Everyone is so proud of 'Ghost,' but what about me? I mean, I know I wasn't the best kid, but do people still remember me..? I waited til I thought they would forget about me, or accept this Ghost kid as me, but.. they do still remember Jimmy, right..? Their first grandson?... it hurts to think that they would've forgotten about me... surely they haven't.. especially not grandpa, right? He called me his bud, he wouldn't forget his bud, would he..?
...

He probably did...

When we got home, they took me to m-- Ghost's room and layed me on his bed, turning the lights off and leaving me to rest. I pretty much stayed there for the next few days, somehow managing to keep control. Luckily for me, that stupid box didn't show up, so I had an opportunity to think. Well, think as best as I can with my brain deciding not to function, that is. How long was Toast going to be here again? I forgot. A week? A month? A day...? Either way, I'm pretty sure my chances of seeing him are gone. The only one who I can talk to, who I can get help from, and I can't get to him because of my-- Ghost's want to be a hero. What's the point in being a hero if you can't save yourself..?

.....

It had been a few weeks now since that injury. Ghost still hasn't tried to come back out yet, luckily for me. I feel better now. Sort of. I'm still not completely healed, but I'm better than I was before.. I really only have a headache at this point, everything else seems to have left.

I have to wait another week to go back to school, but I could go now. I feel up to it... perfectly... fine... nope, never mind. I don't feel fine, still tired. I sighed and waited for the pain to pass.

.....

Another week's gone by, I'm going back to school today. There's no point in it though. Toast won't be there. He's the only reason I'm even out. I can't even talk to Katrina about it because... well... y'know... I shrugged and continued getting ready for school.

My grandfather drove me there and made sure I got inside before leaving to go about his day. I got inside and went to class, that girl who I was trying to save thanking me and making sure I was okay when she saw me. I would just nod and keep going. Ghost would've taken it all in, the kid has an ego, but I don't. I don't care for socializing. I just want to see that dumb Brit and get this over with.

I'd listen for his name throughout the day, maybe someone would mention him. When I asked a group of kids, they all said he was great that day he came, but that's it. They didn't mention him coming back anytime. I even asked a teacher and they said about the same thing. Nothing about him coming back... it seems I've missed him... I'll never see him again, I guess... my one chance and I blew it... great...