With you I feel loved

Chapter 36

DAYS MISSING: 117
Days in Thailand: 69
Weeks until the baby arrives: 14 weeks

Harry's POV

"Hey, Michael, its me, Harry. Can you pick us up from the hospital? Jen is going home today."
"Hi Harry! Yeah, sure, everything okay with you guys?"
"Yeah.. we're both doing fine, thanks."
"Good to hear. Be there in an hour, okay?"
"Yeah see you soon, thanks buddy!"

I enter the room where Jennifer is getting ready to go home. She is a little unbalanced and weak but she sure as hell is better than a week ago. If only I  left those 3 beers in the fridge instead of drinking them... I could have avoid this. Now we have to go back to New York. I am responsible of this. I wanted to make Jennifer love me and forget Beau, but instead, I brought her closer to him. I might have dug my own grave by causing that accident. I hate myself.

Jen's POV

"Ready?"
"Yeah, almost. Did you call a cab?"
"Yeah, sort of. I called Michael. He's gonna pick us up."
"Ahh okay. Great."

"So... we've got one week to get our things and say goodbye to the village. The news is already spreading like a fire that were leaving to New York."
"So be it."
"Hey what's wrong?"
"Nothing, I'm just... nervous.. anxious... terrified... I just don't feel great, let's keep it to that."

I really can't tell Harry that I'n frightened to face Beau after all that time. I know I told Harry to leave his name out of the conversation, but what he did... what other explanation could I give Beau? 'Hey, Beau, sorry for not contacting you these last 4 months, but we're pregnant and I actually don't love you anymore so I panicked. But surprise, here I am. Oh and by the way, I will continue my life in Iceland.'

I have one week to figure out a way of telling Beau about what happened with me the last 4 months. I don't want him to get any reason to be angry at me, so it must be a story in which I'm the victim of it all. But it also must be a story where no one (read, Harry) will get charged for anything.

My mind is making twice as much hours as usual, my body feels weak, I am homesick to Thailand and the people here already (I hate goodbyes), I am anxious about the flight, I am scared what will happen to my baby, I am scared to face Beau and my parents, my sister, Leah.... Shortly said: fear and emotions are taking over my body.

"Wanna go get a drink before Michael gets here?"
"Sure."

I walk with Harry to the cafeteria of the hospital.
We both order a coffee and it's the moment where Harry gives me a hand with taking a seat that I notice his arms got thinner.
"Harry? What's wrong with your arms? Did you lose weight?"

"Uhm, no, I'm fine. It's just, I haven't worked out in a while."
"Hmm, okay."

We drink our coffees and discuss a little about what's coming this week. About the packing, the goodbyes, the time we have to be at the airport, which hotel in the city we're gonna sleep in, etc.

It looked like 10 minutes, but Harry told me we'd been talking for 45 minutes when Michael arrived.

Off we go then, to the last week in Thailand. The week that should have ended different than how it will end now. Anyway, I had a great time here and I really hope to get back one day.

It's pretty ironic that back in New York, I dreamed of going on adventures over the world, but now that I am in Thailand, it feels like the biggest adventure in my entire life is about to start the minute I get on that plane. Back to where it all began, back to New York.