WARNING: THE AUTHOR OF THIS BOOK IS MENTALLY INSANE

My Reaction To Dispicable Me 2 In A Nutshell

My reaction to 'Despicable Me 2' while watching the movie:

On the outside: ....

On the inside: HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT, HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE. DID I JUST WITNESS AN ANIMATED NICO DI ANGELO? OH MY GODS. ITS BEAUTIFUL.

My reaction to 'Despicable Me 2' after it finished:

On the outside: Wow, that was a great movie!

On the inside: WHY THE FUCK IS ANTONIO/ANIMATED NICO DI ANGELO ONLY IN TWENTY FUCKING MINUTES OF THE FILM?! WHY IS HE A BACKSTABBING JERK?! WHY ISNT HE MORE IMPORTANT TO THE PLOT?! THAT'S IT. I'M REWRITING THE ENDING TO A FUCKING CHILDREN'S MOVIE. BUT STILL NEW OTP. OTP OTP OTP. I LOVE THIS KID.

My reaction to 'Despicable Me 2' while sleeping on the couch twenty minutes later:

On the outside: *pretending to be asleep*

On the inside: OMG I JUST REALIZED THAT MARGO LOOKS LIKE ME AND SINCE ANTONIO IS BASICALLY THE REINCARNATION OF NICO THAT MEANS IN SOME WAY NICO DI FUCKING ANGELO AND I WERE DANCING. I should make a GIF: Margo is labelled as "me", Antonio as "Nico do Angelo" and Gru as "Reality". TO THE GIF...MAKER...THING. I DON'T KNOW I'VE NEVER MADE A GIF BEFORE AND OH I NEED TO MAKE A MENTAL NOTE TO DRAW MARGO AND ANTONIO I DON'T CARE WHAT ANYONE FUCKING SAYS THEY ARE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER I MEAN LOOK AT THIS KID HE WANTS TO PLAY VIDEO GAMES FOR A LIVING COME ON THIS IS THE NEXT PEWDIEPIE SERIOUSLY. *continues to imagine different endings for example: El Macho is in the purple form thingy and is about to collapse a building on Gru & Co. Antonio grabs the secret syringe of emergency yellow stuff that his father told him about in case a minion tried to bite him or something. Anyway Antonio stabs the syringe into El Macho just as he's knocking over the wall of the building. It falls towards Margo, with Gru & Co. yelling, "Margo, look out!" or something. Antonio pushes Margo out of the way but instead gets hit by falling debris. Gru runs over to see if he's alright, then Antonio says, "I just didn't want Margo to be hurt. Now go save your world." referring to Lucy when he says "your" instead of "the". Eventually Margo forgives Antonio for his 'betrayal' earlier and kisses his cheek, making him blush.

Wow I just wrote an entire alternate ending. DREAMWORKS/DISNEY/WHOEVER MADE THIS MOVIE, WHY DIDN'T YOU GIVE THIS AMAZING CHARACTER MORE SCREENTIME AND PURPOSE I MEAN MY GODS, THE LEAST YOU CAN DO IS GIVE HIM AND MARGO A HAPPY ENDING.

OR I'LL WRITE IT MYSELF. I'LL DRAW IT. I'LL ANIMATE IT. I'LL HIRE MOISES ARIES AND MIRANDA COSGROVE TO DO THE VOICES. I SWEAR TO THE GOD OF THE PARTHENON, MARGO AND ANTONIO WILL HAVE A HAPPY ENDIBG IF IT TAKES FIFTY YEARS TO PRODUCE.

....

I should write a rant about this eventually...