That's Why I Love You

Chapter 35

Clarke

"You invited Luna to dinner?!" I yelled incredulously. Raven and Octavia stood in the background, obviously feeling the same as I but not being brave enough to confront Lexa.

Lexa watched me get my anger out. I stormed around the room and folded blankets angrily, throwing them on the top of the couches. I scooped up the packaging of the food that Raven wolfed down a few minutes ago and threw them into the trash.

"Nothing will be achieved if she stays in that cell for the rest of her life." Lexa replied calmly and wisely. I growled. She thought she was so enlightened and always knew the best action for every situation. Usually, she was right but I wished for once she wasn't.

"Nothing needs to be achieved!" I spat, lighting a few candles to keep my hands busy. Lexa watched with amusement. I walked back over and stood in front of her.

"You gave me a chance. You saw that I was human beneath my armor. I need to do this for Luna." Lexa said. I lowered my eyes and absorbed her words. "You do not have to attend. None of you do." She looked to Octavia and Raven. "But I hope you will, if only for yourselves."

I glanced back at Raven and Octavia. They looked at me with skepticism. We didn't want to see Luna. It didn't make sense. Lexa wasn't going to kill her, and she went as far as opening her heart back up to her sister. I didn't understand.

I stepped closer to Lexa and looked intently in her green eyes, trying to search for some sort of motive.

"Why are you doing this?" I whispered.

Lexa swallowed. "Like you said—she's the only family I have left."

I nodded sadly. I didn't realize those words would come back to haunt me, otherwise, I never would've said them.

Lexa reached forward and placed her index finger under my chin, lifting it up to look her in the eyes.

"You are my family, now. The Nightbloods are, too. But Luna is the only blood relative I have left, as far as I know." She said.

I smiled at the confession, but it didn't change the situation. Lexa was still letting the most dangerous person to her walk free. Luna could slit out throats in the dark of the night. She could kill the Nightbloods, too. She was broken and too far gone in her own demented mind to be saved.

I shook my head and stepped back from Lexa. "I'm sorry....I just can't understand."

Hurt flashed across her eyes and it broke my heart. I knew she needed support on this, but I didn't know if I could give her this. I still hadn't completely given her my forgiveness for what she did to that Flokru village. It was too much to forgive overnight.

Her jaw hardened and she looked at the floor blankly. I knew that face. She was so desperately trying to keep her emotions back. I felt awful for doing this to her. I thought I had broken down that barrier, and now she was building it back up.

"Regardless, I hope you all come in order to get whatever closure you need." Lexa said, her eyes darting up to meet mine. With that, she turned and left the room.

I shuffled around to look at Octavia and Raven.

"Do you guys want to go?" I asked. I wasn't sure what I wanted them to say. I knew I'd be unhappy with either answer. And I knew their answer would help me with mine, or give me an excuse to go with whatever they said.

Raven placed her hands in her back pockets. "I think Lexa would want you to come, Clarke. She needs you."

I breathed in heavily. "I know."