That's Why I Love You

Chapter 5

Lexa

It had been two days. Two days since Clarke left. Two days since I talked to her.

And two days of incessant worrying.

I sat on my throne with my mind on Clarke. The dagger that I loved to play with to strike fear into my subjects sat untouched in its holster. My vision was focused on the bottom of the stairs. The place where Clarke shamelessly bowed to me.

"Heda?"

My eyes snapped away and turned toward the man standing twenty feet away from me. He was the replacement Titus, and he was awful at it. He was afraid he was going to say or do the wrong thing and end up like that Ice Nation representative who was kicked off the tower. But Clarke had changed me, and he was somewhat forced into the job, so the thought hadn't even crossed my mind.

His name was Thrandr, I believed, and he was in no way the next Flamekeeper. He was just to keep me informed and announce my presence.

"Yes?" I asked, lifting my head high. He nervously wrung his hands together and stared at the floor. Apparently he had heard the rumors that I was the reincarnation of Medusa.

"What is to be done about Titus? The Ambassadors are getting impatient." Thrandr said.

I nodded and swallowed. I needed to know what Clarke thought. I hadn't thought to ask her before she left. And if death was to be Titus's fate, I would need her here by my side.

"I would like all Ambassadors to be present and for all thoughts to be heard before any decisions are made. Tell them that." I said. Thrandr nodded and scampered away.

The hour went by slowly. Men fought over land and thought they should bother their Commander with their dispute. An Ambassador demanded answers about Arkadia, but I kept my lips sealed.

And then it was time to train the Natblidas. When Clarke wasn't here, this was the best part of my day.

I met Aden before we trained. I hadn't seen him since I had been shot. Clarke thought that it would be a bad idea to train. I had to agree with her on that. The Natblidas liked to get rough with their Commander, especially since they were the only people who could do so without punishment. In fact, they got encouragement and praise.

I saw him putting on his light armor in the hall away from the Natblidas. The Natblidas considered themselves siblings, but there was an atmosphere of tense competition between them. They knew they would eventually have to kill each other. I knew it, too. But it didn't make the thought hurt less. I hoped they would be older and wiser when I died and they had to fight to the death.

From the moment Aden arrived in Polis he tried to distance himself from the other Natblidas. He took on my notion of "love is weakness" and never saw himself as a brother to the others. And now that I had dropped that idea with Clarke, I wish he would too.

"I heard you donated blood to my cause, Aden." I said, walking up behind him. He startled and his cheeks grew red.

I pretended not to notice.

He bowed slightly and swallowed. "Yes, Heda."

"Why?"

"I did not want you to die."

"Maybe it was my fate to die. And you weakened yourself in the process." I said. I knew Clarke said that people made new blood, but I wanted Aden to realize his mistake.

"Clarke said that it wouldn't weaken me. I would have just as much in a few days." Aden said. "And if it was your fate to die, I don't think Clarke would've been there to save you."

I lifted my head and closed my eyes for a moment. That girl will be the death of me. But I would gladly do so for her.

And I was filled with pride for Aden, demonstrating the wisdom that I tried to teach the Natblidas every day.

I wasn't going to win this battle. I should move on from the subject. I didn't want unwanted ears listening in and knowing Aden weakened himself for me.

"Well, thank you. I probably would not have survived." I said. "Now, go get your brothers and sisters and meet me in the forest with Thrandr."

It was Titus's job to oversee the Natblidas. And now it passed to Thrandr. The Natblidas hated him, but loved to make fun of him and make his job harder than it had to be.

Aden always volunteered to fight with me first. Soon, he would graduate from sticks to swords.

As Aden and I clashed, I thought of Clarke. She should've called by now. She should've called over a day ago. Something should be happening. Were they just sitting and waiting for their deaths? Was Clarke waiting for me to realize she was in danger and come and rescue her?

Suddenly I was on my back, and my breath was sucked out of me. Aden stood over me, a triumphant grin on his face. I gave him a soft nod and rolled my eyes. Aden's eyes turned cold as he glanced at my abdomen.

"Heda..." He gulped. I sat up and looked down. There was a small amount of blood where my stitches were. They had stopped bleeding shortly after Clarke had left. The wound was supposed to be healing by now.

I stood with ease. There was minimal pain. There wasn't a reason to worry, or try and reach Clarke. I didn't want to call her and risk their leader finding it out.

Aden's eyes were filled with guilt, and soon my heart was, too. I wasn't going to have him donate blood, just for me to die as an effect of our training.

I shook my head. "Don't worry, Aden. Clarke said this would happen. Now, go and train with the others."

Clarke didn't say this would happen. Actually, she said that if it did, it could lead to my wound completely opening and losing even more blood. And then she wouldn't be here to transfuse.

Thrandr ran over to me.

"Heda? Are you alright?"

"Yes, yes. I'll be fine. Get me my horse, please."

I tried to breathe steadily. Clarke said staying calm in a situation like this was important.

It won't be an issue, I told myself. You'll just get a healer to look at it real quick.

Thrandr ran over with my horse and handed the reins to me. He tried to hold me as I got up on the horse, but assured him I wouldn't need assistance.

"Make sure they get back safely." I barked as I rode away.

My healer, Mia, was tending to my wound. She was young. She reminded me of a Clarke that had always been on the ground.

"Just give yourself a day or so. I sewed it up a bit more and placed a sturdier bandage over it." Mia said, bowing and walking out of the room.

Thrandr walked into the room as Mia was walking out. He blushed when he saw how pretty Mia was and then when he almost ran into her. I smiled internally. I made a mental note to keep an eye on how that panned out.

"Heda--it's the Sky People." He said breathlessly.

I sat up abruptly, my breath hitching.