AMACon 3: Oikos - Home

Mirror - Chapter Five

Maine was thanking all the gods and deities that she's given the chance to be with RJ. Unlike in the past, she now constantly dreamt of RJ. Sometimes, she'd see him standing on the same path as her and they'd just talk until it was time for them to go. Other times, she'd find themselves in a dark room with a small bed. Their naked bodies would be pressed against each other, passionately expressing their love to one another all throughout the night. And somehow, though she didn't know when, he became her home.

Home.

She never had a home. Ever since her parents died, she was repeatedly told that she was practically useless and unwanted. She was ignored and treated like dirt. She got used to it and just did whatever she wanted within reason. She figured that if she tried hard enough, her family would eventually accept her. They never did.

The opposite was true when it comes to RJ. He always went out of his way to make sure that she alright and that she was happy. He actually made an effort to get to know her, and to understand her. No one has ever done these things for her, and for some time, she thought that no one will. Until she met RJ. It's one of the reasons why RJ will always have a spot in her heart forever.

Even so, she couldn't ignore the voice inside her saying that everything must come to an end at some point. And that she haven't even met this guy she was supposed to be in love with. While these were ugly thoughts that she shouldn't pay attention to, it still made sense to her. They can't do this forever. At some point, they'd have to face reality and accept the fact that perhaps everything was just a dream.

With all her heart, Maine wished that this would not come to pass.

***

RJ was starting to think that he should just stop trying to fight his fate. He should convince Maine to take his place so he could finally go home, instead of thinking how he could change his captor's mind.

He was already engaged to a woman he doesn't remember, and he has friends waiting for his return. What was he trying to do now? He shouldn't miss her. He shouldn't wish she was right beside him. He shouldn't think about how right it felt to have her curled up against him, her fingers clasped in his. He shouldn't yearn for their playful banter and conversations that made him feel like he wasn't alone. Instead, he should remember why he's doing this in the first place.

Then again, how can he do that? Things had changed. He was no longer the man he used to be. He's now selfish. He no longer cared as much as he did before about his past. He didn't want to let her go because he would be lost without her. She gave him hope for a better future. For a happier life. For a home.

Looking back, he knew he was quick to accept his captor's offer. He should have asked for more time. He should have thought of the consequences of his actions. I was weak. RJ thought to himself. He gave up and accepted the fact that he was doomed to spend the rest of his life in his prison. But this time would be different...

Because he was determined to fight for her — someone who was worth dying for.

***

It was now or never.

"What do you want?" His captor gave him a chiding look as soon as he arrived.

RJ turned to him and did a double take. His captor no longer looked like Jerald. Instead, he had black hair, dark eyes and a clear complexion. Is this his true appearance? He thought to himself. If that's the case, he certainly has a face that would make the angels weep.

"What? Make it fast or your friend will lose his head," He barked as he tapped his foot impatiently on the floor.

"I...I want to renegotiate our deal," RJ blurted out. "I don't think my target would say yes to me."

His captor let out a harsh laugh and RJ stared at them with a deep frown. He couldn't figure out his captor's reaction.

"Wait. Are you serious? Oh God. I thought you were joking! Did you really want to see your friends in the afterlife?"

He shook his head. "No! Please. There has to be another way."

"I already told you! Your request requires a trade, boy," His captor moves around the room, his face contorted and angry. "I'm not a bloody fairy godmother who would be content with a thank you and a happily ever after."

RJ's eyes suddenly prickled with tears. He had to be strong. He had to do this. He already knew that it would be a lost cause, and yet he decided to ask his captor about it.

"But..."

"But nothing!" His captor cut him off. "You should do whatever the hell I want because I told you so! Think about your friends and family! Oh, and your lovely fiancée who is fortunately still waiting for you! Can you really sacrifice your freedom for some girl you just met? A girl who is already sentenced to die at my hand?"

RJ squeezed his eyes shut and then clenched his jaw to stop himself from screaming at him. He thought for a moment, trying to find an excuse that would help his case. "I don't think I can convince her to take my place."

"Please! Are you blind? She's obviously so in love with you. All you need to do is to snap your fingers and I'm sure she'd come running like a little puppy. Besides, I thought you wanted to be free?"

RJ shook with anger. He wanted to apologize and just do what his captor wanted, but he couldn't. It didn't feel right to sacrifice the life of the woman he loves because he wanted to be free. He doesn't see how he could survive or live a live in the real world without her.

"I can do anything except that." RJ gave him a pleading look.

His captor's eyes turned red. "Here's a news flash for you, boy. You don't have a choice. It's either you do this or YOU. ARE. ALL. DEAD. There is no middle ground. Capice?"

RJ nodded his head against his will. He was going to lose everything either way. All he needs to do is to admit that fact to himself.

"You just wasted fifteen minutes of my time!" His captor said harshly. "Now, don't call me again unless you already have her. I have a lot of things to do and I don't want you disturbing me."

RJ sighed in defeat. "I'll keep that in mind."

"I already gave you a second chance, RJ," his captor said warningly, anger flashing in his eyes. "Don't make me regret it."

His captor gave him a final glare before disappearing out of thin air.

***

RJ is hiding something. Maine thought to herself. They had been in bed for the past two hours and he barely said a word. He didn't even try to touch her. She couldn't help but look at him scrutinizing. She asked, "What's wrong, love?"

He turned to her and she was caught off guard by the pain and desperation in his eyes.

"I...I can't tell you," The helplessness in his voice made her freeze.

"Why?"

"Look, I have to go," he said, sitting up and turning his back to her. "I'm sorry but I can't stay tonight."

She grabbed his arm instinctively when he stood up. "Why?" Her voice broke but she didn't care. She wanted to know what was going on.

He didn't speak and simply pulled off his arm. He disappeared before she had a chance to say anything.

It wasn't supposed to hurt her but it did. He never did that to her. He always bid her goodbye. He always assured her that he would be back. But he didn't do any of those things tonight. She didn't what to think. She never once considered that fact that he may leave her. She never even thought that he'd hide his problems from her.

And perhaps, that will be her downfall.