loyal customers (homestuck x stripper!reader)

busted

you had not been prepared for the amazing tackle hug you received. mituna was now on top of you... on the ground... squealing like a tween at a justin bieber concert. sollux was laughing do hard you don't doubt that he would piss his pants. "shhh shhh hey tuna" you say again. mituna smiles, quieting down a little as you pet his hair. you can hear footsteps coming down the stairs. that must be their dad, psiioniic. somehow you knew that sollux would be a grown man still living with his dad. psii had always been a good man though, he would watch after the boys. "thollux... what the fuck" yep... that's psii. "hi mister captor!" you said, forcing yourself into a sitting position with mituna in your lap. "who are you?" he asked. okay seriously? even mituna recognized you. "oh wait. maybe this will help" you pulled your hair into a ponytail and gave him a bright smile. "will that be cash or a check mr. captor?" you said in a overly sweet voice. he stood, uncomprehending until he laughed loudly. "oh ____! hey thweetheart!" you giggle loudly and wave at him. "mituna hath actually been athking about you" "so I've been told" at that point, your nice conversation was cut off by the older of the brothers. "gueth where ____ workth now?" he asked. you gave him the death glare but he only laughed at you. "hm... I'm not really thure. I remember her being a bright one" this only makes sollux more giddy. "dad thhe workth at the club. thheth a thripper!". this makes psiioniic do a double take. "wha- really? damn you have grown up. too bad I work there too" "what?!?" "yeah I work the lightth. today wath my day off". you stare in disbelief. "why do you work there?" "eh... dulthcar wantth in my pantth. thatth all" you gag at the thought. that man was truely disgusting. I mean sure you had had a tiny crush on psii as a kid but, you weren't married with a son. you would question your boss' life later. right now, you have a mituna to snuggle. the bad thing is, he grew up to be really good looking just like you thought he would be. how could he not with the captor genes? he nuzzles you, taking you out of your thoughts. "so tell me" you say, looking at psii. "who /is/ getting in your pants recently?" sollux laughs and, is that a blush on psii's face? "well" the cocky boy says, in full gossip mode, "you remember the vantases?" he asked. you nod.of course you remember them. kankri was your best friend for years but you havent talked in ages. "well thineleth ith tapping that" psii looks up as he is pointed to. "boy I am thtill your father and I will bend you over my knee right now. and if we are being thpecific... itth me thatth doing the tapping in that thituation." you laugh so hard you almost piss your pants. "wait... what about deciple?" you ask. psii looks down. "thhe left him. and the girlth" "oh poor signless!" she left the poor man to raise not only their two kids but her daughter from a previous marriage too? not to mention his own son fromvthevdame circumstances.  oh god. the rest of the day is spent trying to get sollux to spill about his romantic past. you don't even think to ask mituna, so sollux tells you. "he hath a girlfriend you know" he said as mituna slept with his head in your lap. "what... really? is she... you know." "no... thatth the weird thing." you ponder over that for a while until you fall asleep on the captor's couch like the freeloader you are. its okay though. you like it this way.