Aiden Deis: My Subset of Reality

cont.

10/30/15

So time has passed. I've slept in his bed. I've met his girlfriend. But not really, not truly, not actually. He came to our room last night and asked if we wanted to keep him company whilst he did homework. I had just gotten into bed a while before he came in. I got out of bed, took off my boxers, and on my pajama pants and tie-dye shirt. All four of us in our room joined him to his. I made psuedo-made his bed, spreading the sheets and blankets out flat. I sat with my back resting against his headboard. I played some Zelda game on his Wii U with T delivering increasingly annoying commentary. (For the record, the annoyance was me not liking people reading something out loud, whilst I'm trying to read it for myself. So not his fault.) They finished working, so I turned to spectating them playing Smash Bros. Handed R the Wii U gamepad thing to set down, since the bed is raised quite high, and not easy to get on or off of. R got onto the bed and sat down with his back against my foot. As he sat down I tensed the muscles in my foot such that my toes were drawn tight. Once he had settled, I didn't want to untense my foot for fear that he would move. Instead, I shifted from sitting against his headboard to laying down. I settled my leg close to his back, but he put his back against my foot. I could have slept a week long being able to feel him shake with laughter at something that happened on that enormous CRT. The moment couldn't last forever anyway, so I gave in to blissful sleep instead. And bliss it was, until about 1-2 AM when they got done playing, and we went back to our room to sleep.

I went to my 3PM class to turn in a homework assignment. Prof. J.D. had announced wednesday, that class would be optional today, since we were ahead in the schedule. I turned my assignment in by his podium, carrying my backpack with me, so he could have already guessed at my intention of 'skipping' his class. He takes well to humor thought so I walked halfway to the door. Standing between the door and Prof. J.D., I faced Prof. J.D. and pointing to the opposite side of the room, asked him in a concerned tone: "Professor, what is that?" He turned to look and I sprinted out the door. I peeked back in to see him humored, and left for the bus.

When I got to our room R and one of the other residents, J were there play Smash Bros. I didn't actually notice, but somebody else was also there. I went into my and L's room and tried to think of something to do that didn't involve our living room full of people. I could hear them talking to the effect that the other person in there was R's girlfriend. I went out into the livingroom and R introduced us briefly she was mid Smash Bros match with R. I picked up my kindle from my room and left for the park. It was drizzling when I left for the park.

I sat down on a bench, cross legged, hand waffled in my lap, eyes closed, head bowed. I figured if people thought I was praying it would be the least alarming explanation. Since of course doing irrational things is completely justified by religion. The rain felt really good. I focused on staying as clam as possible. I thought about the reason I was sitting on that park bench in the rain, whilst sitting there in the rain. I came up with a bunch. The most honest of which was: "because I wanted to". I also thought in brief about how I had become quite interested in the possibility of me being a sociopath that morning. The though crossed my mind initially at around 10am, I googled it for a better understanding, and am now quite comfortable with the probability that I am in fact a sociopath. It's brings interesting perspective to a lot of things. Most notably, one indication is: having a flare for the dramatic.