My Friend's Will Accomplished {Part 2}

Chapter 35: Breaking Him...

One week later...

The moment where you realize you're going back home. I was finally leaving the hell of that place and walked to the car by the wheelchair. Nur, mom, Pal, Nihan and Ghalia were around me and Baresh was pushing the wheelchair while I fixed my gray sweat suit and smiled to every single person like I just went out of jail. After long thinking from Can's family and my family, they decided for me to stay in their house and leave home after tomorrow when mom leaves. I was better -seriously- and could walk, but mom kept insisting. She wanted me to stay comfortable. I knew it. She wanted me to stay at Can's so we could have a chance together but noo... What was done was done. I touched my pocket from outside to check the rings and felt the spaces in my heart shrink. We drove off to the house and by the door stood Mert, Natalia -pretty better with her- and Jenny who ran up to me, hugging the hell out of me.

"You're outtt!" She shrieked. I felt a headache hitting back but I held it in because the doctor informed that this was normal. I walked into the house as everyone disappeared doing different jobs, noting that the cake's smell was filling my nose. Baresh was with me the whole way to the living room and helped me along the way. The moment I reached the living room and raised my gaze, I saw him sitting on the couch across me and his head to the ground like.... just.... like I was not there. And, I turned like he was not there. But, it's hard. It's hard him not being there.

"I'm going to help them inside," Baresh said as soon as he put on the couch and made me lie in. I shut my eyes, leaning on the arm of the three-seater sofa. Diagonally sat Can, not holding his phone and not looking at me. A headache started to hit me more, so I decided to give it a break and try to forget his existence. I opened my eyes again, not finding him. I turned to my back and saw him standing right by my head, freezing his shocked eyes into mine. He didn't explain, but he held my phone and put it on silent. I understand now. He looked at me in a plain mask behind emotions. I know it because I knew that Can's eyes were always telling me feelings and stories, but this was not him. I took this advantage from myself and lost this ability. I didn't use my chance well. I looked away, realized that I was exchanging looks with him. He turned and left the room like I wanted him to. Kind of. WELL, no. I didn't. I leaned back again and this time, I just couldn't stay still. I was bored, so I started scrolling on Instagram -distracting myself- and I found nothing but only my fuels burned. I couldn't help but start crying... I let it out and crying is a relief.

"I'm sorry." I heard a voice from behind me and turned after rubbing my tears to find Natalia standing by the door, her head leaning against the door frame.

"For what?" I smiled, faking it.

"You are crying, Alaria. Your tears are because of me." Her eyes were fixed to the wall behind me.

"Ohh, no. I'm scrolling through Instagram..." I made sure no unexpected tears fell.

"Am I blind?" She said and I rolled my eyes, "I can see, everything is obvious. You won't forget him.. you won't forget each other in one day. It was all because of me, I feel sorry."

"It's okay." I said as she sat across me and I heard her let a sigh of relief, "I am losing him because of you but it's okay. Do you know why?" She didn't answer and just shook her head, "Because you tested my friendship with you to my love for him. And, what really hurt is you seeing me in that girl's place. You are right, you are not blind but your eye focus is to one angle only. Think outside the box, think of what you said. If I hadn't left him, you wouldn't have been a friend of mine anymore..." I didn't force my tears in and let relief fill me again, "Look at me. Seriously, look, I'm in my ex fiance's house and was just sitting next to him as a stranger, in his house. He didn't say a single word, he was hit hard on his head.." I was slightly shouting as more tears fell, although the lump wasn't helping at all, "Just minutes after you called, he promised every word I ever wanted to hear from a man. He promised me he loved me and apologized. But what did I do? I freaking left him for you. Because you insulted hell of me on the phone. I wanted to run to his arms and hug him, but nooooooo! No! NO! I couldn't do any of that. I just stood there and wanted to cry. I ignored him and didn't look. And, when I looked, he had already shown me his other face. Do I deserve that?"