Clandestine

The Decision (31)

We walked into the poker room of the casino arm in arm, i glanced around at all the people who were dressed up in the room, all decked out on old Hollywood formal wear. It was beautiful, everyone looked glittery and rich. I spotted Clinton and Piper at the Poker table, while Calie and Justin were no where in sight. Noah took his arm from mine as one of his friends came up, wishing him a happy birthday and introducing him to his girlfriend.

The guy -whose name was Tyrell - nodded towards me, "Didn't know you were the one girl kind of guy, Noah?" My eyes flicked up to Noah's as he looked down at me. 

"Neither did I." He stated, taking my hand. My heart kicked into gear, as Noah said goodbye to Tyrell and his girlfriend and lead me down to the poker table that Piper and Clinton were at. We stood behind Clinton, happiness radiated off Noah and Piper as we watched Clinton lay down his cards. 

I pulled my hand from Noah's as I squeezed Piper's shoulders, "He's never lost at this table," She smiled proudly at him. "He cleans them out every time." 

I looked at Piper's face as she beamed, her hands resting on Clinton's. They had come so far from when I first met them, Piper was always stealing glances at Clinton and hiding any sort of feeling. The love in her eyes was so obvious, I fought the urge to roll my eyes. 

I hoped that if nothing else came out of this case, I at least got to see Piper actually fall in love with Clinton and get closure with him.

I looked at Noah wondering if we would ever get closure, say he was the one doing to hijackings, would I ever be able to move past the feeling of guilt inside me, the feeling that if he went away I'd be forever feeling like I had lost the one person who seemed to get me? Would Noah ever be able to get past the betrayal? 

I wondered what would have happened if I never became a cop and we met? Would I have been the one to break him out of his ways? I knew that if I wasn't a cop and he had asked me what he had asked me in the car, I would've said yes because I wanted that. 

I had known that I wanted something more with Noah from the night we spend talking and snuggling. 

I knew I wanted more because breaking it off with him, even if it was for the better had been the most painful thing I had ever felt. 

And I knew I never wanted to feel that again. 

I felt my hand getting squeezed and I forced myself to look away from Noah and too Piper who had my hand in hers, "Want to come to the bathroom?" She asked, I nodded but paused looking up at Noah again. 

"I'll be back." I forced a smile despite the hammering of my heart which only got worst as he slipped a hand behind my back and pulled me into a kiss. It was short and sweet but everything inside me started screaming. He pulled back, smiling at the stunned look on my face. 

Piper pulled me away from Noah and fast, within a few minutes we were in the bathroom and Piper was rounding on me. "I take back everything, everything I said about Noah not ever changing, I take it back." My mind was screaming at me as it whirled with everything that had happened so far tonight. 

"I can't. I can't do this anymore." I muttered, I couldn't do this job. I couldn't. I wanted out. I knew that if Noah went to jail I could never forgive myself, I working as a detective knowing that I had ruined so many people's lives would never feel rewarding. 

"I've never seen him act the way he's acting around you." She paced back and forth as i lent back on the wall, feeling my head spin, my world was literally tipping upside-down. 

My breath got heavier, "I can't breathe." I murmured trying my hardest to get the air into my lungs, to get something inside me working again but my whole body was on lock down.  My hands shook as I held onto the basin for support. "I need Calie." Calie would know how to help me, I needed someone to help me. Someone to take my mind off of the decision I had come to while looking at Noah. A decision that had been ripping me inside out.