Northern Downpour|Ryden

Weathervanes my one and lonely

Brendon came home from work with a smile on his face. He was so excited to see Ryan and tell him the good news.
When Brendon entered the apartment he found Ryan eating a bowl of cereal in front of the TV, still in his work clothes. Ryan always got off work before Brendon but Ryan was usually taking a nap.
"Hey Ry" Brendon came into the living room. Ryan looked up at him and nodded as his mouth was full of food. Brendon laughed a little and sat down next to Ryan, kissing his full mouth. Brendon waited for Ryan to swallow his food before he made his announcement. "So...I got the promotion!" Brendon announced and Ryan jumped up at the news. He set his bowl down and gave Brendon a hug.
"Congratulations baby" he said and then kissed his cheek.
"Yeah, they're going to have me sing at the front of the shop and play guitar. I'm even aloud to except tips. I start doing it tomorrow" Brendon explained.
"That is so exciting? Do you make more money?" Ryan questioned.
"Yeah, just a couple extra dollars an hour but it's going to be so fun doing what I love for money" Brendon smiled as Ryan grabbed his hand.
"I am so proud of you Bren, you wanted something so you went out and got it."
"Thank you baby" Brendon smiled and gave Ryan a quick kiss. He turned his body to face the TV and Ryan picked up his food. They both sat and watched TV for a little until they both fell asleep, they were both pretty worn out from work that day so sitting in front of TV made them sleepy.
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It was Ryan's day off but not Brendon's so Ryan decided to go visit his boyfriend at his new job of singing.
After grabbing a bite to eat Ryan headed down to the music store where Ryan worked. He pulled into a parking space and then walked closer to the building, slowly he heard his boyfriend's amazing singing voice get louder along with the sound of a guitar. He realized after a few minutes Brendon was singing Thanks For The Memories by Fall Out Boy. He smiled as he walked in. He stood among the other customers who were watching the man perform. Ryan was mixed in with the other people so he was sure Brendon didn't see him come in.
"One night and one more time, thanks for the memories even though they weren't so great. He tastes like you only sweeter. Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories, see he tastes like you only sweeter" Brendon finished and then thanked the small crowd of people as they cheered. "I'll be back in 5 minutes" he told them and then walked to the counter, going behind it. Ryan watched his adorable little boyfriend as he talked to a taller man, about 6 foot or so, long brown hair and mustache. The man nodded along to what Brendon was saying. Soon Ryan walked up the counter with a smile on his face.
"Excuse me, but that young man on stage was quite delightful" Ryan said with a British accent. Brendon turned his attention to the guy and saw it was Ryan. He laughed a little and came back around the counter.
"Hey Ryan" Brendon hugged him and Ryan hugged him back, pecking his cheek. "Did you see me up there?" Brendon questioned.
"Yes, you were amazing. Is there anything you can't do?" Ryan questioned with a laugh. 
"Yeah...bare your children" Brendon joked, grabbing Ryan's hands.
"I'm sure they'll find a way" Ryan joked back making Brendon throw his head back laughing. "What song are you going to play next?" 
Brendon pondered that question and smiled at his little idea.
"I'll let you guess" Brendon grinned his Ryan grin and then went back over to the stage area. It wasn't really a stage, it was a small platform that went an inch off the ground, it had a microphone stand and a guitar stand. Nothing much but Brendon worked with it because he loved to sing. Brendon put the guitar on and pulled the microphone up to his mouth.
"Alright...this song goes out to a very special person in the crowd. He is the love of my life and I don't know what I would do without him. I love you Ry" Brendon said with a wink, looking at Ryan. Ryan blushed at the small gesture. 
Brendon began to sing as Ryan watched in awe as his boyfriend matched note for note Blink 182's "All the small things." Little did the two love birds know at the time, the boss had come in and he heard Brendon's little dedication, he was very against gay people and he was not aware of Brendon's sexuality. He groaned and went in the back, he was going to let Brendon finish his song but he was going to fire him as soon as he was off stage, he was not going to let a gay guy work at his store. No matter how well of a singer he was.
"Say it ain't so, I will not go. Turn the lights off, carry me home. Keep your head still I'll be your thrill. The night will go on, my little windmill. Say it ain't so, I will not go. Turn the lights off, carry me home. Keep your head still, I'll be your thrill. The night will go on, the night will go on, my little wind mill" Brendon finished. He thanked the crowd once again and got off his stage, as he noticed his boss gesturing for him to come through. Brendon followed the man to his office in the back, he wasn't really sure who he was because this man barely ever came in. The man gestured for him to sit down and Brendon did.
"If you don't know who I am, I am the boss of this little business. I own this place and I make all the rules and regulations. One of my rules is that I don't hire homosexuals. It looks bad for business" he started. Brendon gaped at what his man had to say. "I'm sorry" the man smiled. "Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Robert Hopis. But you can call me Mr. Hopis." he laughed. "For the time being of course. I don't agree with your life style and if I would have known you were gay I would have not let that imbecile hire you in the first place. Anyway...you're fired." he told Brendon.
"Are you kidding me? That is so fucked. I am a hard worker and you're going to fire because of my home life? That's discrimination. I am going to sue you for all your worth. You can't fire me for my sexuality. That has nothing to do with how hard I work. I love this job and you're going to take it from me because I'm gay?! I'm not even gay, I'm bi.." Brendon shot at him, his voice getting louder as he stood from the chair. "Ha, like you know anything about that. And Chase isn't an imbecile, he's a great guy and when I told him I was in a loving relationship with my boyfriend he was super happy for me. He is constantly asking me about my boyfriend...no-" Brendon decided. "I don't want to work for a man like you, so afraid of change and different people. I much rather pick up garbage than work for it. Goodbye...Robert" Brendon stated lastly before walking out the door.
Ryan saw Brendon walking out the door of the office angrily and on the verge of tears. Ryan walked up to him and asked what was wrong but Brendon didn't answer. Brendon looked to his boyfriend then to the man that just fired him, smirked, grabbed Ryan's face and kissed his lips harshly, as if to prove a point. He then turned to the small group of people that was probably waiting on him to sing again.
"Hey everyone!" he got their attention. "This man" he pointed to Mr. Hopis. "He just fired me because I was gay. He is an awful man...but the position for singer is open here." he told them. Instead of getting hyped for a job they all booed the dark man in the business suit. "And also, I love my boyfriend. I love this guy right here. In-fucking-love with him. What do you have to say about that?" he asked as he grabbed Ryan's arm. The group cheered for the two boys as they walked out. Brendon felt adrenaline run through him as he walked to his car.
"What just happened?" Ryan questioned him, as he stopped.
"That asshole just fired me for my sexuality. But I'm going to sue him for all he is worth. Fuck him and his stupid store" Brendon informed him as he opened his car door.
"Wait, how does he know you're not straight?" Ryan asked.
"He probably heard that thing I said about you...I don't know, doesn't matter. I'm fucking pissed...I can't believe I just lost this job" Brendon shook his head. "I'll see you at home baby." Brendon said as he got in his car and drove off, leaving Ryan with a dumb look on his face. On the way home Brendon's adrenaline slowed down and he began crying. He hated that he just got fired for something so stupid, he hated that people discriminated against him because of who he was. It wasn't fair. People hated him, told him he was a sinner, told him his life style wasn't right, they hated him for who he was. His depression kicked in, a feeling he hadn't felt in a long time because of Ryan,was now full in him. He wanted to hurt something, someone or even himself. 
Once he got to the apartment, he went inside and into the bedroom. He cried on the bed for a while before he turned to face the ceiling. He hated living in a world that didn't accept change. He wanted to die, he wanted to stop feeling like this. 
He sat up, wiped his eyes and went into the kitchen. He looked through the drawers and found a small box cutter. He slid down to the floor and put the small blade to his wrist, making one small cut. 
He forgot how weird, painful and...amazing that felt. He felt happy as he let the blood drip down to the floor. He liked the thought of how easily the thing keeping a person alive could exit a person's body and eventually all of it would be gone and so would the person. He hadn't thought about that since his breakup with Dallon. Ryan had been the one to help him through this.
Brendon went to do it again, crying and shaking as he went, until Ryan came in screaming for Brendon to stop. Ryan's voice made Brendon dropped the blade, as he cried harder, covering his face in shame. Ryan fell to the floor and wrapped his body around Brendon. 
Neither Ryan nor Brendon said a word for a while. Until Ryan decided that he should put something on Brendon to stop the bleeding. His hand covering the wound really wasn't working.
"I'm sorry" Brendon cried as Ryan covered his wrist in some bandages. Ryan didn't respond, he was too focused on what he was doing. "I really am...I just-I got depressed. I forgot how great that felt...to have blood flow out of me so easily-"
"That doesn't make it okay Brendon" Ryan cut him off. "I know you're hurt Brendon, I am sorry you got fired and I see that it made your depression come back, something I thought we got rid of a long time ago. I understand it came back because of this. I just-I love you Brendon and I don't want to see you hurt like this. I hate it...I don't mean to be harsh I just...I don't know." Ryan couldn't fathom the thought of Brendon being in this slump again but here he was just as he was a year ago.
"I really am sorry...it was the only thing I could think to do. I won't do it again" Brendon defended himself.
"You don't need to defend yourself to me Bren...I get where you're coming from. This just really sucks that it happened" Ryan tried to smile to make him feel better.
"Don't smile at me like that. I don't deserve that smile, I deserve for you to be angry with me." Brendon looked down. Ryan grabbed Brendon's face softly, pulling it up to look at him.
"You deserve to be happy Brendon. I get why you do this...you use to be depressed and something came up to make it come back. I made you happy once, I can do it again"
"You shouldn't have to worry about that."
"But I will and I will stop at nothing to make you smile again Brendon, your happiness is something that is really important to me" Ryan assured him.
Brendon just sighed and looked down at his hands, twisting them around each other, he didn't know what to say or do. He felt weird and sad. Ryan didn't have anything to say either. Ryan hated to think of it but he figured he would give it a shot, he knew if he couldn't put a smile on his boyfriend's face, maybe is closest friend could. So he called the mans number with a great despair, leaving the room and asking the man if he could come over. The man of course, was more than okay with it.
Around 10 minutes later, Ryan opened the door to see Dallon standing there. Dallon was confused as to why Ryan called in the first place. All Ryan had said was that he needed to come over for Brendon.
"Why did you call me over here?" Dallon questioned. Ryan stepped away so Dallon could come in. "I thought you hated me?" he questioned.
"Oh, I do but Brendon needs you and I am willing to put aside our differences for Brendon. Plus this will be a good way to test you and make sure you are over Brendon. The last thing I need is Brendon hanging out with his ex boyfriend who is still in love with him. Now...he's in the living room. Go talk to him" Ryan pretty much ordered and Dallon just followed the instructions. It kind of hurt Ryan to think that Dallon could make Brendon happy instead of himself, it actually made him want to cry. He loved Brendon and the thought of not being able to make him happy like Dallon might, made him almost question the relationship.
Ryan of course, sat in the living room just to watch Brendon and Dallon's interaction.
"Dallon? Why are you here?" Brendon asked when he saw Dallon standing above him.
"Ryan asked me to come over to see what was up? What's wrong?" He asked sitting next to him. Brendon sat up so Dallon could sit with him.
"I got fired from work today because I'm bisexual...it's not just that though. Everyone is always against people like us. Ryan and I can't go anywhere without getting stared out. I just want to go out in public without getting questioned about my sexuality. It's making me depressed." Brendon explained. Dallon shook his head until he saw the bandages around Brendon's wrist, this fired him up and he grabbed Brendon's wrist.
"Are you seriously doing this again Brendon? Fuck!" Dallon shouted. "You said you wouldn't do this anymore. You told me years ago that you would stop and you fucking pull this shit again?"
Ryan almost intervened but he wanted to see how the situation would play out. How would the ex boyfriend's and now current best friends interact when one of the boy's boyfriends was sitting right there. 
"I know Dallon, I was just depressed. I forgot what it felt like, it's such a rush, it's like adrenaline."
"Yeah and it could kill you Brendon! Imagine if you did it when no one was here. You could bleed out." Dallon shot.
"I'm not going to do it again, so just chill" Brendon got louder.
"Chill? You want me to chill? This is the reason I fucking stopped talking to you after I graduated. I can't deal with having a friend like you. I thought that we could be okay but you are fucked Brendon, jeez." Dallon stood up. Ryan was a little ticked off but still refused to get in their conversation.
"You're being so crazy right now Dallon. It was one more time, I put it behind me now. " Brendon stood up as well.
"You just did it. How can I believe you? You need help...then we can be friends"
"But Dallon-"
"No. Don't speak to me. I don't want to be your friend anymore Brendon. Don't talk to me" Now Ryan was ready to speak because no one treated his boyfriend like that and got away with it.
"Dallon, he was just trying to talk to you. I brought you over to talk to Brendon not belittle him. He is asking to be your friend, just like you wanted and you're kicking him when he is down" Ryan told him.
"Yeah but I didn't know he was going to end up like a little emo child again, who thinks cutting himself is a good way to cope with depression." he gestured to Brendon as he talked.
"Fuck you Dallon, this is why I hate you. You can fuck off"
"No, you can. You both are gay little boys who can just sit in the fucking bathtub and cut each other" Dallon stepped closer to Ryan. Ryan was fuming, he went to swing at Dallon but Dallon caught it and punched Ryan so hard he fell to the ground landing on his face.
"Ryan!" Brendon shouted. Dallon left as Brendon dropped to the ground to check on Ryan. Brendon turned Ryan over and Ryan was groaning. There wasn't any blood, his eye was red and it hurt.
"Damn, do you see why I hate him now?" Ryan grabbed eye. Ryan stood up, with the help of Brendon and sat back down. "Fuck him. You don't need him in your life"
"I see that now" Brendon sighed. "You're going to get a black eye"
"I know, this is what I get for inviting him over." Ryan shook his head.
"I'm sorry he was such an asshole. When he was in middle school he use to cut constantly, he did it every day and after he got helped he realized how crazy he was so when I started doing it and he found out he freaked out and made me promise not to do it anymore and I did. I guess when he saw I did it again he got scared." Brendon defended him.
"He doesn't need to fucking punch me though. You aren't going to talk to him anymore are you?"
"No, of course not. You can hurt me all you want but as soon as you lay a hand on my boyfriend that's it" Brendon assured him and Ryan nodded with a small smile