"Ruin and Redemption"

A Monster Rears its Ugly Head

“Please, Lizzie! I didn’t mean it that way!” Izzie cried two months later. She was back in Lizzie’s bedroom and wearing the white lacy dress Lizzie liked to dress her in. Lizzie was in a rage.

“How dare you!” She shouted at Izzie, threatening her with the brush.

Izzie had several bluish bruises on her fair skin where Lizzie had grabbed her roughly in the heat of passion.

“I didn’t mean it that way, honest, Lizzie!” Izzie insisted.

“Stop lying to me, Isobel!” Lizzie became even more enraged, grabbing Izzie by the shoulders and shaking her roughly. She stopped shaking Izzie, grabbed the silver handled brush, and took a violent swing at the side of Izzie’s head before flinging her away onto the floor, where blood flowed from her temple and the side of her mouth. Lizzie stepped over her, disgusted. “Don’t you ever, ever lie to me again, Isobel!” She screamed, barely caring or noticing the blood streaming down her lover’s face. She was still alive, that was all that mattered.

Izzie clutched her head, tears streaming from her face, and tried to protect herself by rolling onto her side in a fetal position. Lizzie kicked her callously in the side before striding quickly from the room and slamming the door behind her.

Lizzie ran down the stairs to the kitchen, still in a rage, hoping to find Patsy. Instead the kitchen was empty. She grabbed the biggest knife she could find, and held it out in front of her, contemplating whom she would kill first, herself or Esme.

That bitch had already taken her husband. Now she had found a way to displace Lizzie again, taking her lover as well!

All the love Lizzie had felt towards Izzie had turned into rage when she had seen Izzie’s horse outside, then heard Izzie’s muffled moans resonating from Esme’s room. Lizzie had listened for quite some time outside the room, just to make sure. Esme’s moan of release confirmed for Lizzie that the unthinkable had indeed occurred... again! Once more, she was being humiliated, brushed to the side like an impotent ragdoll, while those she loved shared passion and joy with each other. Well, she was not suffering in silence anymore! She wasn’t simply going to allow everyone to get away with this disrespect and humiliation of herself any longer. This time someone was going to suffer; someone was going to pay. If she couldn’t join the others in their happiness, then they would join her in her suffering instead. Josiah had Mindy. Derrick had his lovers. Izzie and she had had each other, and Lizzie had been happy for a brief while, thinking that barring any interference by the local gang, she and Josiah’s sister could be together for some time. But no! Lizzie was not being allowed to keep anything of her own! Just like her husband, Izzie had abandoned her for the flashy French whore who had intruded upon her home.

A wiser part of Lizzie reminded her that Izzie was Josiah’s sister, and deserved all the love and respect that Joe had earned defending Lizzie from those who had sought to kill her. Joe would be very upset if anything happened to his beloved sister. So what, said the demon feeding on Lizzie’s rage and humiliation. I have a just cause, Lizzie thought. Izzie didn’t even tell me she wanted something different; she allowed me to find her like this! And Esme is a guest, not an intruder, and look at all the good work she’s done. But what has she ever done for me---aside from taking my husband away even more nights than he was already spending with Scarlett, and remaking my home as hers! Lizzie continued to allow her darkest impulses to guide her as she ran up to her bedroom to wait for Izzie. Let her think Lizzie was a fool and didn’t know. She would take the girl for her own again, if she could, but afterwards, well, Lizzie would do what she felt like doing. If Izzie didn’t please her today, if she didn’t make up for her time with Esme, if she didn’t apologize, if she didn’t at least admit her wrong and say sincerely how sorry she was for her humiliation of Lizzie…