I Know I Shouldn't (Sequel To I Need You So Much) [Oliver Sykes Fan Fic]

Feel My Heart

Song: My Favourite Thing by Tonight Alive

Melody

“So, are we actually doing that band thing?” Cory asked as he looked through my CD collection. He probably could recite each album I had by heart, but he still always ended looking through them a hundred times before picking one.

“Yeah, we should,” Elliot responded eagerly. Cory played drums, Elliot played guitar, Jared played bass, and I sang and played guitar, so we pretty much had a whole band.

“My parents probably wouldn’t mind if we practiced in our basement,” I told them. My dad was actually always saying how he would love if we started a band, so I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if we ended up practicing in the basement.

“Cool. I’ll bring my drums over tomorrow after school and we can start practicing. You’ve written some songs, right, Mel?” Cory responded. He had finally picked a CD and put it in my old, beat up player. A moment later, sounds of Bring Me The Horizon’s Sempiternal came pouring out of the speakers. 

We sat it silence for a few moments until I started to sing along. Can You Feel My Heart was the first song on the album and I absolutely loved that song. “So, what are we gonna be called?” Jared questioned as the second line of the song came on. 

“Can you hear the silence? Can you see the dark? Can you fix the broken? Can you feel... can you feel my heart?,” I sang along under my breath, completely ignoring the question. When music was on, I always had a hard time concentrating on anything else.

“Hey, how about that?” Elliot exclaimed as I continued to sing along. I knew every Bring Me The Horizon album by heart after seeing them play so many times.

“How about what?” I questioned when there was a pause in my dad’s voice. I looked over at him, hoping he wouldn’t say something ridiculous.

“Feel My Heart!” he answered energetically. He gave me a huge grin obviously waiting for my approval.

“I actually like that,” I responded, grinning back. I knew as soon as I told my dad, he’d love it too. He always told me that he would support me with whatever I decided to do with my life, but I knew deep down he hoped I would pursue music.

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“Just put them over there,” I told Cory, pointing to a corner of our basement. Today was the first official day of band practice and I was pretty excited.

“Thanks for the help, Mel,” Cory joked sarcastically. My opinion was that it was my basement and they were lucky my parents were open to have us practice down here so they should be doing the work. Well, really I was just being lazy.

“You’re welcome,” I replied with a devilish grin. I then settled down on the couch and pulled out the notebook I wrote songs in. The last time I wrote anything was the night of my date with Tyler and I had really liked the way it came out. I had decided to call it My Favourite Thing. I of course couldn’t ask my dad for his opinion because of him being so overprotective about this whole thing, though.

“So, do you have any good songs?” Elliot questioned. He sat down next to me and peered over my shoulder. It felt kind of weird  to have him reading my work, but I knew if I wanted to be in a band I would have to become more comfortable with sharing what I wrote with other people.

“All the songs I write are good ones,” I replied, trying to sound as conceited as I possibly could. He punched me playfully in the arm before continuing to read my scribbly handwriting.

“Did you write this about Tyler?” he teased. All three of them liked to tease me about my new crush. As soon as the words left his mouth, my cheeks turned a deep shade of pink.

“Ooo, she’s blushing,” Jared taunted with a grin. He then sat down on the other side of me to read my notebook. As soon as Cory had finished setting his drums up, he stood behind the couch to join in on the reading fest.

“In all seriousness, Mel, that’s really good. I just wouldn’t show that to your dad. He might have a fit,” Cory told me. I had told Cory all about how annoying my dad was being looking for some advice. Since Cory was terrible at giving advice, none came.

We ended up spending the next few hours figuring out how the instruments would sound to go with the song. “You guys wanna try it out all together?” I suggested when we had figured almost everything out. They all agreed and we started to play. 

“I fall at the thought of us falling apart,” I started to sing, but I didn’t get any further because my phone rang loudly. “Sorry, guys,” I apologized before running over to check my phone. I heard Elliot murmur something about it being ‘lover boy,’ and he just so happened to be right.

Tyler: Hey u still up 4 hanging out 2day

The text reminded me that I had told Tyler that we could hang out today. That was before we had decided to get this whole band thing moving. I let out sigh. I didn’t want to bail on Tyler, but I really wanted to practice this song. “Um, would you guys mind if I invited Tyler here. I kinda told him we could hang out before we decided to practice today,” I told my friends. If they said no, I was going to kill them all in their sleep.

“Yeah, sure,” Jared replied with a shrug. I gave them all a grateful grin and continued to text Tyler and tell him he could come over to watch us practice.

As soon as I had hit send, I jumped back in front of the microphone my dad had given me to use and we started the song again. When we were done, we made the adjustment we felt would make the song better and were just about to run through again when the basement door open and Tyler started to come down the steps.

“Hey,” he greeted with smile. I could feel the butterflies in my stomach flap their wings. I really hadn’t thought inviting Tyler over through. Now I would have to sing in front of him and singing in front of people was one of my phobias.

“Hi,” I replied, giving him a shy smile. At the sight of him, the memory of him kissing me popped back into my head, which didn’t help my nerves.

“Just pretend like I’m not here,” Tyler told us before sitting down on the couch. I had left my notebook laying next to where he was sitting and I was hoping he wouldn’t read it.

As much as I tried to pretend like Tyler wasn’t watching, I just couldn’t. Being around him made me nervous and the whole time he had his eyes on me, which didn’t help. I tried to focus on the chords my fingers were supposed to be playing and the words that were supposed to be coming out my mouth, but his eyes kept locking with mine.

“Wow, you have a beautiful voice, Melody,” Tyler complimented when I had finished singing. The flattering remark turned my cheeks red and caused me to advert his eyes.

“Thanks,” I mumbled, running my hand through my long brown hair. I had always been terrible at taking compliments and no one had ever complimented my voice. That might be because not many people had heard me sing, but that was beside the point.

“Did you write that?” he questioned. I couldn’t tell if that meant he liked the song or not. I wanted him to since I wrote it about him.

“Yep,” I replied, trying not to seem so self-conscious. I usually didn’t care what people thought about me, but it was different with Tyler.

“It’s really good. You’re really talented,” he praised. The flattery caught me off guard. I wasn’t expecting to tell me that he thought I was talented. There were plenty of people who were far better musicians than I was, but I could tell the compliment was genuine.

AN: I'm going to make Melody's band (Feel My Heart) sound like the band Tonight Alive.