These Demons

Chapter Twenty-seven

**Unnecessary information: I don't think I'll ever be a Panic! fan because I don't like their music, but I watched them on Seth Meyer's show on Wednesday and I get why girls fall for Brendon Urie because he's hella attractive**

How is a mystery to me, but I make it through the day and we all leave the studio having done something productive. 
Everything has been sorted and settled and as soon as we've met with the label on Monday, we'll be able to announce everything to the public. 
The thought of that is sickening, but I know there's no way out, so I'm at least glad to be done dealing with the topic for now.

Relief is something I'm still not capable of feeling, though, because when I enter my apartment, I remember I'll see Zoe tomorrow and have no idea what awaits me, let alone what this meeting with her even is.
Is it a date? She would have told me that, wouldn't she? Besides, why would she want to go on a date with me anyway?

But if this isn't a date, then what is it?
Why does she want to show this place to me that is obviously so important to her?
Why does she want to introduce me to such a big part of her life when I really don't know anything about her or her life except this art thing?
Why does she want to show me such private things all of a sudden in the first place?

So far, all we ever did together revolved around me.
She's always there to take care of me.
What does it mean for us that it seems to be changing?
What does it mean that we seem to share parts of our lives that aren't about my issues?
What does the word 'us' mean anyway?
Is there such a thing?

My head spinning from too many thoughts, I feel drained and debilitated and can barely gather the energy to do some workouts with some awful free app in the living room before I take a shower, eat some pure salad and fall asleep watching TV.

---

Before I even arrive at the address Zoe gave me, I've already smoked half a pack of Marlboros to ease my tension, but not surprisingly, it didn't help much and when I enter the building to take the elevator to her apartment, I'm so light-headed, dazed and jittery that I almost forget to ring the door bell.
A few painfully uncertain seconds I spend wondering if I picked the right outfit pass and she opens the door.

I knew about her being quite attractive, but I never witnessed her looking so breathtaking until now. Her curly hair is loose as always, but she's wearing a knee-length dress in a beautiful dark blue shade that hugs her enviable slim figure with black tights underneath and matching boots, a dark leather jacket giving it the perfect rock chick attitude.

When I blankly stare at her gorgeous face, she asks: "How do I look?"
"Um, nice." I sound like a total dork.
"You make me feel shabby in my band merch," I then add with a little smile to let her know she actually looks great without having to tell her, and she giggles.
"It's fine, really. Anything other than your retired emo kid clothes would look weird on you anyway."
Retired emo kid?

Frowning, I choose not to comment that and guide her to the car outside once she's grabbed her tiny purse and slammed the door shut.
"Do you have the addresss?" Zoe politely asks and I notice she's even wearing nude lipstick, which she's never done before in my presence. "Already saved," I answer and point to my car's GPS before starting it.
"You came prepared?"
She sounds impressed and a small smile creeps onto my lips.
I still feel nervous now that I sit next to Zoe, but with every minute we spend chatting about people we don't like or things that pass by, I'm able to calm down a bit more until we arrive at the point of destination and my stomach wants to turn upside down again.

Before I can debate whether I should open the car door for her like a gentleman, Zoe has already climbed out and shut it with a grin plastered on her face.
"It's good to be back," she comments at the sight of the group of buildings lining up in front of us.
After paying a ridiculous amount of money for parking, I follow her to what I believe is the entrance because she knows all the ways around here.