| | 3:20 p.m. | |
Me:
Dude...I was cutting it close this morning...
Jake:
Aren't you glad I called you then?
Me:
I would've preferred a more peaceful wakeup call. Not some marine shouting in my ear.
Jake:
Hey, this marine got your lazy ass out of bed this morning.
Me:
My ass was nowhere near being lazy. Thank you very much.
Jake:
Maybe it was...assidentally lazy...lol!!
Me:
Oh.My.God. Did you just?
Jake:
Yes. Yes I did. You jelly bro?
Me:
No...just...no.
Jake:
*le gasp* Don't tell me...you're not a punny person?! Hahahaha!!
Me:
Dear lord, make it stop!!!!
Jake:
Alright, alright. I'll stop...
Jake:
For now.
Jake:
But all puns and joking aside, you do have a pretty nice ass.
Me:
Just "pretty nice"???
Jake:
I mean, I wouldn't exactly call you a bubble butt.
Me:
Stop. I made a mistake. Let us stop talking about my rear end.
Jake:
Aaaw...am I making you blush?
Me:
Nope. Just...flushed.
Me:
See what I did there??
Me:
Cuz we're talking about butts, and so toilets...and flush...
Me:
No?
Jake:
Please...for the world's sanity. Don't ever make puns...ever.
* * *
Dedicated to the punny Rora_chan14. I tried, boo. Hahahaha!!! Have a great week everyone~
Happy (not) Monday!!
* * *
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Midnight Messages
Short StoryUnknown Number: I buried the body. What now? Me: Umm...what? Unknown Number: Ah shit. Sorry, wrong number! Could you like...delete that message? Me: Will the police be able to track it back to me if i don't? Unknown Number: ...yes. Me: Ok. Dele...
