Harley and joker oneshots

April fools

Harley's pov
Ugh! This day has to be the worst day of the whole year!
Oh your wondering why,okay let's see... my boyfriend is the king of jokes! And every year he always get me! It's soooo annoying!
But I have a plan this year,to not get out of bed,all day!
Damn it! How am I suppose to get food?!
I'll think about that later,now to starry my plan that will probably fail!

"Harley,wake up."
I didn't say anything.
"Harley,I know your awake,you can't fool me." "Ugh,I don't want to get up!" "Come on baby."
He then started kissing my neck.
"Ohhh! Stop puddin!" "I will once you wake up."
I then open my eyes and look at him.
"Happy!?" "Very,now come on,daddy needs you to do something." "I don't trust you!" "Whatever do you mean pumpkin?" He asked with a devilish smile.
"Ya know exactly what I mean puddin." "No I don't baby,but what I do know it I need your ass down stairs with me!" "Okay okay I'm comin."
I then get up but get pushed back down.
"I forgot I left you naked." "No! I mean I'm not it mood puddin." "When are you not in the mood?" "Well right now."

I then put on one of his shirts and went down stairs.

My puddin was taking to long so I went back to our bedroom to see him having sex with doe hoe!

"Puddin!" I said in a more worried tone.
"Hey Harley." "Baby,why did you stop,come on J!" "What the hell puddin! I thought I thought-" "Harley do me a favor and leave!" "But I- okay."

I then leave and lock myself in the down stairs bathroom.

"Why don't I leave! But I can't!"

I then hear a knock at the door.
"Go away!" "Harley,I have to tell you something important." "What?!" "Come out and I'll tell you."
I then walk out.. he then grabs me and pins me on the wall and kissed my neck
( so many ands holy shit that's not how your suppose to write! Don't judge I'm sick but I'm writing anyways lol )

He then whispered to me
"April fools." "What do you-" "baby,you really think I would have sex with a hoe?" "Well-" "Harley!" "No." "Good girl,now lets have some fun." "But what about-" "I paid her to do that,and then killed her." "Oh puddin,I mean I don't know,you kinda hurt my feelings." "Oh baby,come on." "Ugh,no!" "You know you want to."
He said while wrapping his hands on my waist.
"Come on Harley,it's very rare we do this." "What are you talking about-"
He then kissed me.
I tried to pull away but he wouldn't let me.
"Ugh! Fine let's do it!"

A/N
Sorry guys,it sucks... and yes I know I say that all the time but this time I really mean it.
But like I said I am really sick,and have a major headache soooo I can't think as good right know I am sooo sorry
Xoxo