Silent

Chapter 13

Olivia was coming over for dinner tonight. That meant I had to cook since my brothers can barely cook a decent meal. It also reminded me of the fact that I've barely been eating lately. I just hadn't felt like eating, with everything going on lately.

Not eating had definitely taken its toll on me. Not only had I lost weight, but I was also losing a lot of the energy I had before. Even with the lack of energy, neither of my brothers even noticed that I hadn't been eating.

For a moment, I thought that maybe Luke had actually started to care. He had gotten so mad at me when I had told him I was on antidepressants again, so I assumed he loved me.

He didn't.

Luke returned to being his usual, uncaring self. He barely even acknowledges my presence anymore. I've just been pushed back into his shadow like usual.

Shaking my head to clear the bad thoughts, I set to work on dinner. I was making lasagna and French bread. We didn't have lasagna that often, and when we did I usually made it since Luke and Beau were too lazy to actually cook for the amount of time it took to make. I didn't mind, though. I enjoyed cooking.
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There was a knock on our door a little after 6:00, the time Olivia was supposed to be here. I was in the middle of taking the lasagna out of the oven, so I yelled for Beau.

"Beau, can you get the door?" I yelled. Beau came downstairs, grunted angrily, and finally opened the door for Olivia.

"Um, can I help you?" Beau asked her, confused.

"Beau, she's my friend. Just let her in already." I rolled my eyes at his obliviousness. Olivia strolled into the kitchen a few minutes later.

"That looks amazing." She commented, talking about the lasagna.

"Just wait until you try it." I smiled at her. I saw Beau wander into the kitchen with a smirk on his face.

"So, Jai." Beau purred. "Who's your friend?"

"This is Olivia, and stop looking at me like that. She's just a friend!" I rolled my eyes as Beau put his hands up in surrender. I turned to look at Olivia and smiled when I saw her trying to hold back her laughter.

"Wow, Jai your face is really red!" Olivia teased. Beau burst out laughing when my face heated up even more. I couldn't help it. I was easily embarrassed.

"That's it! No lasagna for either of you two." I huffed, making them laugh even harder.

"What's this about no lasagna?" Luke walked in, chuckling. Olivia's eyes immediately went wide at the sight of him.

"I-I'm O-Olivia!" Olivia stuttered awkwardly. Luke gave her a strange look and took a step closer to me.

"So, is this your girlfriend?" Luke asked bluntly, ignoring Olivia's squeal of protest.

"No-" I started to answer, but was immediately cut off by Olivia.

"I would never date him! We're only friends." She explained loudly. Luke narrowed his eyes at me.

"What's wrong with, Jai?" Luke asked, surprising me. Olivia gave me a glare, probably signaling for me to keep my mouth shut.

"He's not you, to put it simply." Olivia smiled lovingly at Luke.

"Well, okay." Luke was at a loss for words. He looked over at me without saying anything, so I forced a smile for him. Honestly, what Olivia had said hurt. It was t my fault I was Luke's twin, but she had made it sound like dating me would be worse than  dying. I know I wasn't Luke, but I couldn't be that bad.

"Why don't you show Olivia around, Luke." I mono-toned, causing everyone to look at me in confusion. Olivia furrowed her eyebrows at me in confusion. I know it must have been weird with my sudden change in mood.

"Come on, Olivia. Ignore him. He's just being Jai." Luke led Olivia out of the room, leaving Beau and I behind.

"Are you okay?" Beau asked, actually concerned for once. I looked up at him and nodded.

"Yeah. I'm fine. I'm just not feeling too good right now." I lied. "Wanna help me set the table, so we can actually have a proper dinner for once?"

"Sure, little brother." Beau smiled sadly and took the lasagna away from me. He caught me off guard that time. He never calls me 'little brother'. Only Luke. It was weird and I started to feel like my chest was caving in from the feelings I started to feel. I eyed the big steak knife we kept in our kitchen and quickly pocketed it. I needed it for something tonight.

I walked out into the living room, only to see Luke and Olivia laughing together like they had been friends for years. I felt my chest ache again. That's strange. Luke suddenly threw his arm around her shoulders while they were talking and I felt a hint of jealousy when her cheeks turned pink in response.

"Hey Lukey?" I called out, walking towards them. He turned to me and dropped his smile as soon as he saw it was me.

"What do you want, Jai?" Luke groaned, obviously thinking I was being a burden again.

"I....dinner's ready, but I'm not really feeling good. I'm just going to walk up to my room for a bit. You guys can go ahead and eat without me." I said, giving him a small smile.

No one tried to stop me, and with every step the knife in my pocket felt so Much heavier.