The Journal of a Heartbroken Girl

Day 2

I woke up scared to check my phone. Had he responded? Had he ignored me? He isn't the same and his behavior has become unpredictable.

I lay quietly for a while till my mom comes in my room. For those of you thinking my mom has no clue how heartbroken I am, she does. The night we broke up I slept in my moms bed with an old baby blanket. In the back of my mind I was going for comfort.

Today my mom and I would be going out. She was leaving me with the car while she was at work.

I force myself out of bed and got the courage to look at my phone. Every notification possible minus his. It's what I expected.

I changed from pjs to joggers and a hoodie. What a difference. I lay on the floor: waiting (for my mom).

After dropping her off I return home to sleep more before I get ready for my day which planned out to be a good few hours with my grandmother and picking my mom up to go to the Cubs ring ceremony/game.

As I was eating with my grandmother I had finally gotten a response. I glanced at my phone to ensure my ears weren't deceiving me.

"I smiled through all of that😅"

I slightly smiled at the fact it had made him happy and didn't bother to reply till just before I left from my grandmothers.

"Me too"

Later that night on my way home in the car I charge my phone. I see that there's a Snapchat and a post made by him on instagram. Going with what seems more recent I unlock my phone to his post. His wallpaper. I wonder if he had done it. He never got on here anymore. I wonder if now that he was he finally deleted me from his social media life. Much to my suspicion, I was correct.

I was erased. As if we never met.

"I'm sorry" he texts immediately.

Why? Why delete them then apologize? Why feel bad?

"You know it's me right"

In other words I'm not to blame for what's happening.

"I don't know what to tell you anymore." I'm lost. I'm confused.

"I'm sorry"
"I'm going to bed now goodnight🌙"

... goodnight.

I sang and I texted with friends who seemed sadden by news and rooted for us regardless of what was happening.

"He still loves you. You can tell. It won't be forever. You'll find each other."

I didn't say a word till the morning.

And old screenshot.
"I don't know how things went from this to now. That's what's got me fucked up. I just hope you figure yourself out and make yourself happy again like the boy I fell in love with. Have a good day."