The Reality of my Dream

Chapter Twenty: I Promise.

{A/N: The Twenties already! WOAH! Thanks for your support. I love you all so much. I don't have much to say. So here... here. Take this. Take it. Take, just take it my loves. Now open it up and read it. :) Here is a short, but EMOTIONAL chapter! Yay! ~Dee}

Chapter 20: I Promise.

Lynsey’s POV:

Soon enough the power came back on, Ryan went home and we haven’t kissed or anything since the night the power went out. I wonder what Shawn did to him in the kitchen? Speaking of Shawn, he is in his room doing God knows what, I haven’t seen him for about an hour. Payton and Daniel left to go home and my mom still hasn’t come back since yesterday. I’m sitting on the couch, Castle’s on the television, hot chocolate sits on the table next to the couch by my phone, and I’m turning the pages of this amazing book I’ve started, Murder at Midnight. I like the background noise of the television. I don’t know why, I just get really freaked out when there is no background noise and I’m alone in a room, it makes me feel like something is going to like creep out of the dark, noiseless areas of the room and murder me. Go on, judge me. Do it.

I get about halfway through page 84 when my phone starts to vibrate. I flipped over my book and placed it onto my leg before grabbing my phone and answering it.

“Hey mom.”

“Hey sweetie. Your brother didn’t pick up his phone, I just want to make sure that you both are okay.” she responded.

“Yeah we’re fine. When are you coming home?”

“I’m just about to leave. I’ll be home in about 40 minutes. Do you need anything?” she says.

“Umm… we are out of coffee?” I said, hoping that she wouldn’t be suspicious as to why.

“Alright.” she said, “Well I’m going to go now, bye sweetie. Tell your brother to make you some dinner if he hasn’t already.”

“Okay mom. I will. Bye.” I said as I took the phone away from my ear and hung up.

I looked at my phones bright screen remembering the text that I got earlier today as I went into my messages. I tapped on the phone number and starred on the message that I still didn’t respond to and had no idea how to even do so. I read the message over and over again until my eyes hurt from staring at the screen too long and locked my phone placing it beside me. I cleared my throat, looking up at the ceiling and blinking.

“Shawn!” I yelled and heard his door fly open and him race down the hall.

He rushed to my side, “Lynsey! You okay?”

I looked over at him, trying to hide the fact that I was almost in tears, “Mom is very mad.” I cleared my throat, “You should answer your phone next time. She’ll be home in thirty-five minutes or so. Plus she wants you to make us some dinner.”

He looked into my eyes, I think he could tell I was on the verge of tears before, “Okay. Is that everything?” he asked.

“Actually one more thing.” I said.

He looked at me concerningly.

I smirked, “When you snoop through my stuff, you should probably put it back where you found it before leaving the room.”

“Oh… um.” he rubbed the back of his neck, not looking at me anymore.

“Yeah Shawn, ‘Oh… um’ is right.” I scolded him, “Why would you go through my stuff?”

He looked up at me nervously, “Well the last time I left for college, you weren’t, well you weren’t doing so well. I tried to get you to open up to me, but you wouldn’t. So one day when you went out for your jog, I kind of went into your room to find something to help me understand why you were so… down.” he spoke slowly and cleared his throat, “That’s when I found that notebook.” he looked down. “What was in it, I-I couldn’t believe my eyes. All of that depressing stuff you wrote and the drawings and just… everything. I didn’t want to look anymore and think that my baby sister was feeling like that, but I kept turning each page and it just got worse and worse.” he started to get teary eyed.

“When I was on my way back and I was so scared to see you. I was so afraid Lyns, but then I got here.” he smiled weakly, “And well... you were broken from the crash and what not. But I could see it in your eyes and in your laugh and in your voice that you were back. The real Lynsey was back. When you came home and I saw you genuinely smiling and laughing. You seemed like your old self again. The happy, bubbly one that saw good in everything and everyone. The one that smiled all the time and could be a little too sarcastic sometimes. The one that even if I was having a bad day, if I saw her I would feel ten times better. But, but I couldn’t be sure…”

I just stared at him, quietly with tears filling my eyes, as he let out what he must have been keeping bottled up inside this whole time.

“... so when I went to get your lamp I went into your journal. I opened it up to the last place I was before I left. I know it’s private and that it was wrong, but I had to make sure that you are okay, otherwise I would never forgive myself… if, if you weren’t. It was bad at first, but gradually was getting better. I read that thing you wrote on the… person…” I knew what he was talking about. “and you seemed to be a whole lot better than before. I noticed the last date in there was sometime in September. It was so relieving to see that you aren’t just acting okay. And I know, I know that you aren’t fully recovered, but it’s just, it felt so good knowing how much better you are from last time…” I looked at him, seeing his tear stained cheeks and glassy eyes.

“Shawn…”

He grabbed my hand “I love you Lyns. And I don’t know what I would have done if… if…”

“I know Shawn. But I didn’t.” I gave him a weak smile, feeling a knot in my throat, “I didn’t.”

He pulled me in for a long hug.

“I love you Shawn.” I whispered into his neck.

He broke, starting to cry hard, “I love you too Lyns. Please don’t ever…”

“I know. I wont.”

“Promise me.” he said. I stayed quiet.

“Promise me.” his broken voice said again.

I hugged him tighter, “I promise.”

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