Heal Me|JungkookxBTS

,8

Jungkook pov
I stared blankly at the flashing pictures in front of me as a nagging voice echoed in my ears, begging me to eat.

"Please eat Jungkook, you haven't eaten anything all day." Jin begged as he held a bowl of cold rice in his lap. I ignored him and continued to watch the pictures flashing mindlessly across the television. Suddenly the television went black and I snapped my head to glare at Jin, who was glaring back even harder.

"Eat. Now. So Namjoon can take you to your appointment." Jin demanded and shoved the cold bowl into my shaky hands. My bottom lip quivered as I stared at the plain white rice, just the thought of eating made me sick.

Jin is mad at you and it's all your fault. You can't even eat to make him happy. You've only been here a few days and the hyungs already hate you. Kill yourself Jungkook. It'll make the hyungs happy.

"I c-can't eat." I whimpered, my salty tears dripping into the bowl. "I sorry J-Jin hyung...I..no eat!" I sobbed and dug my nails into the ceramic dish, I sounded like a child throwing a tantrum. Ever since I hit my head my speech has gotten better, but I noticed when I get upset or when the voices get louder, my speech worsens.

"Jungkook please don't cry." Jin cooed with a shaky voice, "just one bite...please."

You're making Jin upset you fucking selfish piece of shit.

"I sorry! I-I'll eat." I cried before shoving a spoon of the cold rice into my mouth. I gagged at the bland taste but forced myself to swallow each and every piece. The feeling of the rice sitting in my stomach made my stomach lurch, my throat constrict, and my cheeks tingle. Before I could get up and run to the bathroom I threw up the small amount of rice. I slid off the couch, spilling the dirty rice, and rested my forehead on the floor as my stomach lurched painfully.

You made a mess. You're such a fuck up.

I gagged painfully on nothing and continued to dry heave, I'm sorry Jin, so sorry.

"Oh my god! Jungkook! Baby!" Jin cried and collapsed to the ground next to me. I screwed my eyes shut and dug my fingernails into the carpet, that pet name...Lee used it.
~~~
"Baby boy, I don't know what to do with you anymore." Lee huffed and cracked the whip on the floor, the sharp sound making my skin crawl. "I take your gag off since you've been a good boy and you repay me by spitting out my cum." Lee chuckled, darkly, and cracked the whip again, this time the leather hitting my toes. I jumped and bit down on the plastic ball in my mouth, I won't give him the satisfaction of hearing my cries.

"I'll have to punish you baby boy." Lee sighed before cracking the whip against my back. I screamed, I couldn't help it.

"I only do this because I love you baby." Lee said before snapping the whip against my stomach, back, thighs, crotch, ass, everywhere.
~~~
I could still feel the searing burn of the whip against my skin, I could still hear his voice, he didn't love me.

"Jin what happened!? What's wrong with him?!" A new voice yelled, it sounded like Namjoon. "He threw up, can you go get some towels and clean clothes. Please!" Jin cried and rubbed circles on my hunched back, it hurt, please stop.

Jin must've realized what he was doing because he jerked away from me and tried to comfort me with his voice instead. "Calm down kookie, you're okay." He cooed but I wasn't listening.

You aren't okay. You're sick.

"Lift him up." I heard someone say, I don't want anyone to touch me, it hurts. Before anyone could touch me I sat up, the quick action making my head spin and my stomach lurch. "Don't t-touch me." I cried, the bitter taste of vomit still fresh in my mouth. Namjoon crouched down in front of me and frowned, "but we need to clean you up."

"I can do it myself." I spat, "I'm not a child."

Namjoon seemed taken aback by my tone but he didn't argue with me. "Okay kookie, here's some fresh clothes. Go take a shower." Namjoon said as he handed me my clothes. I made sure not to get the clothes dirty as I stood up and shuffled into the bathroom. Once I was in the bathroom I slammed the door and locked it, I wasn't supposed to lock it but I didn't really give a shit at the moment. I just want to be alone, I'm never alone.

This is a perfect time for you to kill yourself.

I dropped the clothes onto the tile floor and leaned against the wall, the white room suddenly spun around me and another wave of nausea washed over me. When was the last time I actually ate something?

"Jungkook do you need help?!" Someone yelled from behind the door, it sounded like Hoseok. "Kookie please let us help you!" Another voice yelled, Yoongi?

Are you really going to force your hyungs to help you? You're so pathetic Jungkook.

"No, I-I don't need help." I lied and tried to pry myself off of the wall, only to stumble and grab the counter for support. I am pathetic. I can't eat, sleep, or even shower without help, pathetic.

"Jungkook we want to help you." Yoongi whispered, "please let us help kookie."

They're lying Jungkook.

"I don't need your fucking help!" I growled before pushing myself off of the counter. I stood up and tried to remove my vomit stained clothes when suddenly my head connected with the white tiles, and everything went dark.
---
"Hyung this is the second time he's passed out."

"I know."

"We need to take him back to the hospital."

"Okay."

I apologize for all the angst! It'll start getting fluffier I promise!