ENTRY #15 - Boyfriend
Padabog akong pumasok nalang muli sa rest house niya.
Yeah, I'm here again. Stuck with him with no choice. I don't know what's gotten into him for abducting me to this place.
Pasalampak kong ibinagsak ang sarili ko sa sofa. Pissed for all the shits that's happening to me right now.
I should be happy, right? This is my chance. Chance to make him fall for me like what my plan is. Kaya imbis na mainis ako sa mga nangyayari ngayon, I should be thankful that even the circumstances are helping me with my plan.
Sinulyapan ko si Xander na kakapasok palang sa loob. He's a bit hesitant while looking at me but at the same time there's a familiar glow in his eyes.
Ilang sandali lang kaming nagtitigan hanggang sa ako na mismo ang unang pumutol 'non. I shifted my gaze on the television in front of me. I diverted my attention on it kahit na nakapatay naman 'yon. Basta wag lamang kay Xander. Because every time I look at him. His face, eyes... lips. It always leads my mind to what happened yesterday. On how he made me forget the raging anger I'm feeling for the past six years now towards him just because of his touch his kisses and sweet deceiving words.
How he can easily make me an old foolish Isay like before. And I hate it! I hate how he can dominate me again instantly without engaging so much effort while it took me six f*cking years of planning to get even of him.
And now what? I didn't even progress a bit but it feels like I'm beginning to lose again. Lost in him. Dammit! Why!
"Isay..." he gently called my name trying to catch my attention from the turned off TV. I didn't face him. Nanatili lamang ang tingin ko roon. On his reflection on the TV, alright.
Umupo rin siya sa sofa na inuupuan ko. He sat on the other side, almost a meter away from me. I can see his reflection. I can't help but feel unconscious while seeing him looking at me intently.
"W-Why?" I asked. Immediately, I cleared my throat.
"Why Xander?" My voice was cocky bago ako taas-noong bumaling sa kanya.
Ilang sandali muna ulit siyang tumitig sakin. Making my built confidence shattered slowly just because of his gaze.
Sabay kaming napapalunok pero tila wala paring gustong magpatalo o bumasag sa tinginan. I raised my brow at him. I don't wanna let him know how his intent gaze can affect me. Not this time. Not anymore.
His gaze softened. Bago siya unti-unting nagbaba ng tingin.
"I'm sorry, Isay. I'm sorry for dragging you in this kind of situation without asking for your permission. I just want to..." he paused.
"You just want to...?" I asked.
Nag-angat mula siya ng tingin sakin. Making our eyes met. Making me see mixed emotions on his eyes before he continue.
"... be with you. Please don't get mad at me, baby."
I swallowed bago muling binawi ang mga mata ko ng tila may kung anong nakakapasong bagay sa mga mata niya.
An awkward silence enveloped us. Nilalaro-laro ko na lamang ang mga daliri ko while I can still see him looking at me from my peripheral vision.
What now , Isay? Is that your plan? Seriously? Nasan na yung mga planong anim na taon mo pang pinag-isipan? Ito naba yon? You don't progress even a bit. How nice. I sarcastically scolded myself.
