TIME ─ JAEYONG

022⸰

different emotions flooded taeyong as he stood wide-eyed, lips still pressed lightly to jaehyun's. he didn't know what to do. whether to kiss back or shove jaehyun away. this was too much, too soon. his heart clenched, his head spun. 

his mind traced back to what he said at the amusement park. oh how he contradicts himself. his impulse always seemed to find a way to control him.

"i'm sorry." jae mumbled the second he pulled back. "i shouldn't have done that. god, what the hell is wrong with me. that was my first kiss and it's—" just when he was about to break down into tears again taeyong pressed his body into his, their lips molding together.

the kiss was gentle yet firm. it made jaehyun's knees weak. here he was, getting kissed by the boy he saved and fell in love with all under the shining moonlight.

when taeyong pulled back neither spoke, for neither knew what to say. all taeyong knew was that he made a rash mistake. "so the ointment—"

"let's run away." they both spoke over each other.

"huh?" taeyong had to clarify he heard correctly. run away? taeyong had nowhere to run.

"you and i, we can get a house somewhere far. or we can move in with taeil until we find our own spot."

taeyong shook his head, the idea absolutely ridiculous. "you're not thinking straight. hell, i'm not even thinking straight. let's rest and then think about what just happened."

"i know it's abrupt and scary and crazy all at the same time but i can't stand living in this hell hold anymore taeyong. my own mother did this–" he pointed to the sickening bruise. "just because i stood up for myself. and i know you told me i shouldn't fall for you but i can't help it..."

taeyong couldn't help but stare into jaehyun's alluring eyes. hurt, anger, pain, love. all those emotions swam around. those eyes that resembled ten's...

"jaehyun... i can't do this right now." he walked passed, abandoning jaehyun; letting the younger believe he truly was pathetic and foolish.

once inside, taeyong ran up the stairs, all the way to his room where he slammed the door shut before tossing his head back, letting out a cry. a cry that pleaded for help.

he collapsed onto the bed, physically and emotionally weak. "i can't do this anymore." he pulled at his hair. "help... someone please tell me what to do." he wept.

when the pain in his head got too strong he left his bed to enter his bathroom where he yanked open the medicine cabinet. he reached for the pain pills the maids stocked when he first arrived.

only take two, more consumption of the drug may cause symptoms such as–

he didn't care to read the rest. once opened he threw the lid onto the counter, pouring the white circular pills into his palm. he swallowed at least four, the remaining ones clattered against the sink as he sunk back against the wall.

"get yourself together taeyong." his banged his head on the wall twice, grimacing at the pain. "get yourself together..."

he let his head fall forward after a while, the numbing sensation of the pills working their way into his bloodstream. he remained on the floor, his vision started to blur. he found himself trying to stand but once he did his sight turned dark.

...

it's a dream, just a dream