cupid paints blindly {book 2}

23

Margot's POV - 9:00 a.m., Friday, March 3rd, 2017, Year 1.

         He left me there, standing alone in the hallway while I was passed by inattentive employees. I pulled at the fabric of my trench coat I wore and pressed my lips into a thin line. I didn't know if crying was the best response, or relief the other.

He didn't love Lily.

       That was the most shocking news I've heard in months. The words still rang throughout my head and I allowed them to replay, hoping I wasn't misinterpreting any word he had just said. Sure, we argued slightly, but the fact the he didn't claim to love her anymore made up for our harsh, exchanged words.
       It started to make more sense as the thought of it sunk in. Why would he still love her? After getting over the initial shock and the reiteration process of his prescribed pills, he was bound to see past her skin-thick layer facade. I'll admit, I am shocked at how fast he realized. Then again, even if he didn't realize it, he was just ready to let go of her for quite some time. Either that or medication can truly do wonders when used right. But something told me that it may have been a little mixture of both. The only slight problem left, even if I wasn't entirely sure Lily was done with us yet, was not loosing our grip on Jared.
       Hell, I just got him away from that witch, but she handed him over brainwashed. He didn't need to love her; no, that's out of the question now. What she did was leave him scarred.  But here I am still not giving up, and it will always stay that way.

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I left Warner Bros. not too late after, expected worry about Jared's words finally settled in. You know, the type of doubt that sets an incline to whatever hope you could have had? Yeah, that one.
      What if he tried to avoid me or anyone trying to help him since he stated that he clearly did not trust anyone? What if he was planning on quitting now? What if he meets someone who falsely claims to be who he medically needs like Lily? What if he possibly never gets completely healed? What if he remembers everyone except for the people who tried to care for and help him? What if all of those were to happen?

Goddamnit, Margot! Why can't you just hope for the best for once? He's obviously going to be in good care and he'll be better sooner or later! Which means that you need to try and focus on things other than him for once!

I won't even bother listening to you, everything is too unpredictable to believe in crap like that.

Some days, it wouldn't kill you just to hope.

Well, you're my conscience. We-I mean, I am not different. Maybe I'll start hoping when there are true things to hope for. In this case, Jared's trust.

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Later that day, I met up with Karen who wanted to go out to lunch for a girl's day. I was told to meet her at some café that she said had the best selections of coffees and creams, but it would take an idiot to not know that the root of her invitation was about neither.
"So Margot," she said before talking a bite of her muffin and drinking her latte. I never noticed how naturally beautiful Karen was. She didn't need an ounce of make up to pleasingly alter her face in any shape or form possible. Here I was, wearing my hair in messy curls with a beige trench coat and a black cocktail dress, wishing I had at least put more effort into my day like Karen had. Her attire was simple, yet the type of simple that obviously had hours put into it. The fun blue sundress that she wore along with her hair down in waves made my appearance look utterly lazy. But before I could advance these thoughts of slight envy, she continued her perky curiousness with my life.
"You have yet to tell me how things have been going, like being married for starters," she brightly smirked after sipping her latte once again. I shrugged and bit my lower lip, pondering of the right word to actually describe it. Lowering my head as if to avoid shame, I traced the thin line of my  wine glass that was half empty. My mood was not set for any type of caffeine this morning, for I had planned to crash right as I got to the hotel from the tiring plane trip. I cleared my throat as if about to declare a speech of some sort, only to fall short on what I actually intended to say. "Well, uh, marriage is..." I trailed while Karen now awaited me with a raised brow. I chuckled and pressed my lips into a line. "...it's...um..." I trailed again. I immediately started to massage my forehead. "God, I guess you could just call it...complicated."
          Karen nodded precariously slow. "Is it the marriage that's complicated or is it...Tom?" For the fifteenth time today, I was at loss for a good response. I stared blankly into the half empty wine glass as I began to slosh the mixture around. Adding to the amount of stress I had just been under, Tom's sudden abruptness and my new Jared dilemma felt like my chest was only centimeters close to caving in. I felt idiotic for getting so worked over so simple questions, but I guess I never really had the chance to actually talk about how I feel to anyone with the exception of my dad. Should I let go to Karen? Would anyone over hear in this restaurant? Maybe I could tell her in the bathroom, somewhere without the media getting ahold of our conversation. "Can I tell you in the bathroom?" I ask her, eying our surroundings. Karen nodded sympathetically and rose up with me. We took our purses along with us just in case any mischief mind tried to snatch them and found the bathroom at the very corner placed side of the building. When we saw to it that we were alone, we locked the door to prevent anyone from coming in. As soon as I heard the click, tears began to pour out of my eyes as if my whole aura of self-esteem had snapped.
           "Aw, sweetie," Karen soothed while giving me a comforting hug. "It's okay, you can let it out. It's fine. Tell me what's wrong."
          I shook my head and sniffed. "Everything is just wrong, Karen," I mumbled. "Everything! It's as if my life has begun to turn into a wildfire. I can't-I can't escape it!" I cried harder into her shoulder. She patted my back and gave me another tight squeeze. "Tell me how this all began, and I'll do my best to help. If you need to stop or anything, just go easy. I have all the time."