My Everything

0

We were in a bar, Chris, PJ, and myself. We were scouting the men and women that walked by us, unfortunately most were nothing special. I casually sipped my beer as I leaned against the counter.

"What about him?" Chris hit my arm and gestured to a guy sitting halfway across the room.
"No, too butch."
"Too butch? The fuck do you mean too butch?"
"Butch people tend to like control and if I'm not in control then what's the fucking point?" I scoffed.
"Hey, Phil honey, your dominant side is showing."
"Shut up." I hit his arm. "Anyone you guys see that might be a good lay?"
"For you or for ourselves?" PJ asked.
"Either one."
"I see a nice piece of talent in the corner," PJ said. "She's cute, huh?"
"Meh, not my type," I said.
"Why are you so fucking picky?"
"I just want a good shag. Is that too much to ask?"
"Lil bit," Chris said.
"Shut up." I shoved him to the side. "I don't see anyone decent tonight."
"You're right—place is kinda dead," Chris agreed.
"I dunno. I'm gonna go talk to that chick in the corner."
"Good luck," Chris said.
"Thanks."

PJ flicked Chris's head and walked off to talk to the girl. Chris and I sat back and watched as he tried to take her home.

"He's not gonna do it," Chris said.
"Mm... I don't know. He's a pretty good on his feet. We also don't know how gullible she is."
"You're right," he shrugged. "So you're really not seeing anyone that catches your eye?"
"Nope."
"Not even the hot brunette in the booth?"
"Where?"
"The one with PJ's chick."
"He's alright," I shrugged.
"No ones good enough for you, huh?" he teased. "I don't see how he's just alright. He's literally your type."
"Yeah? And what's my type?"
"Shy twink."
"How do you know he's shy?"
"Look at the way he's sitting. Hands tucked into his sweater, slouching, covering his mouth. He's fucking shy."
"I hate it when you're right," I smirked.
"Go talk to him."
"I'll go when PJ gets rejected."
"Fuck you." PJ slapped me upside the head. "We're also going out tomorrow."
"You're buying her dinner?" I asked.
"Yeah, why?"
"Why would you buy a bird dinner when you can just fuck her?"
"Stop asking questions and go, Lester," Chris said.
"Fine," I rolled my eyes. I set my drink on the bar and walked over to him. "Hey baby," I smirked.
"Can I help you?" he asked.
"You sure can, kitten."
"Stop calling me pet names, please."
"Why? You don't like them?" I teased.
"I don't really care for them, no..." He shifted uncomfortably to the right. "Please leave, I'm not interested."
"You don't even know why I'm over here," I defended.
"No actually, I know exactly why you're over here. All you ever do is spend your nights hitting on people and you want me to be your next fuck. You're scouting me. You're a pig, to say the least. Am I close?" He narrowed his eyes. I let out a chuckled and leaned over the booth.
"What's your name, kitten?"
"I don't think that's any of your business."
"His name is Dan," PJ's bird said.
"Sophie," Dan hissed.
"Well, Dan, why don't I buy you a drink."
"No thank you."
"What about coming back to my place for a movie or something."
"No."
"How about–"
"Haven't you ever learned the meaning of the word no? It means I'm not interested. Now get lost."
"You're a fierce kitty, aren't you."
"Knock it off!" he yelled.
"That's enough," Sophie said, "leave him alone."
"Fine," I huffed. "I'll get you eventually, kitten."
"Doubtful," he said. "Goodbye now."
"Bye," I chucked.

I walked back to the bar and took a swig of my beer. I leaned against the counter and continued looking at the shy boy.

"Got shot down?" Chris asked.
"No, he actually agreed to come back to my place for a shag. That's why I'm over here talking to you instead of sucking his face," I spat.
"A no would've sufficed."
"Ugh, I'm sick of hearing that word."
"What word?"
"No," I snarled. "That little shit was as stubborn as a mule."
"Then why are you still looking at him?" PJ asked.
"Cause he'd be a really good fuck," I whined. "Why are all the pretty ones prissy?"
"My chick wasn't," PJ smirked.
"Yeah well, she's not the best looking crayon in the box."
"That's not how the saying–"
"I don't give a shit what the saying is!" I angrily sipped my drink. "I'm gonna get him eventually..."
"Well then you're gonna have to be a bit less creepy."
"Shut up," I scoffed.
"You've got to admit, you're not the most charming person, Lester," PJ said.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You're mean to the people you try to pick up. You see me? I use charm."
"Charm shmarm. It means nothing when you've got–"
"I'm gonna stop you right there," Chris said. "Look at it this way, if you're meant to fuck him, you'll see him again. Okay?"
"Kay, fine, whatever." I rolled my eyes. "I'm getting another drink. Either of you want anything?"