25; I dug two graves for us, my dear

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Johnny's View)

   I woke up to the smell of honey and lavender, the scent sending signal waves throughout my whole body, waking me. I peeled my eyes open and took notice of my surroundings, we were still in Ponyboy's room but it seemed to be more tidied up then before, I looked at Pony to see him slowly stirring awake as well, with. . . different clothing than we went to sleep in. As a matter of fact, My jean jacket and pants were folded neatly on top of one of Ponyboy's chair, I had on gray sweats that were way too big on me, they were baggy beyond belief but It was cool, it was most likely because my sticks for legs, it was kinda gross how skinny me and Ponyboy were, he looked absolutely horrible in front of me, his face was all sunken in, and I could basically see the outline of his skeleton under his skin, skulpting his face scarily.

    Suddenly, and frantically, I sat up and looked around. New clothes, no drugs or needles, not the pouch on the dresser. Someone had caught us.

"Ponyboy!" I whisper yelled to him and a groan left his pale blue lips, "Pony we have to get up! We gotta get outta here!"

"What? Why? Whats goin' on?" He runbed his face and his elbow rested behind him, he sat up confusingly.

"They got it, t-they got the dope, someone c-came in," I said and his eyes widened the size of saucers, he scrambled up quickly and shuffled into his closet, he brought out a big backpack and a jar full of money, couple hundreds were in there and I shook my head, and stood up.

"We won't need that, I have money, put that back." I had felt a little bad because the jar claimed to be 'college tuition'

"Are you sure? Its no problem," He said, a little breathless.

"No its fine, I'm completely sure, just bring a hell of a lot clothes, okay?" he nodded and started to stuff the bag with shirts, jeans and jackets. He zipped it up and I grabbed my shoes from under the bed, slipping them on hurriedly, and Pony slipped his sandals on, we were both wearing sweats and t-shirts, I looked outside and it was dark out, the stars were shining brightly and the moonlight casted down on us in the room, I didn't know Ponyboy could look more paler than he usually was.

"You ready?" He nodded as he slipped the bag over his shoulders, sighing softly. I then finally looked over at the clock, seeing that it was nearing 3 am, they most likely would all be sleep.

   We slipped out of the bedroom quietly, extremely careful about waking anybody, and headed down the steps, I glanced towards the living room, seeing Two and Dally on each of the couches, and Steve settled on the floor next to Soda, since I was sleeping in his bed alongside Ponyboy. I heard him mutter 'fuck' under his breath as he looked at the surroundings, the only way through is that door, and if we open it, it'll be hell for the both of us. What we were doing kinda gave me a spark of deja vu, we were running away, again. We stepped over everyone, hesitance in our every step. Ponyboy then turned the knob to the door quietly and turned it real slow, trying not to make any source of noise so we could avoid confontation from everyone.

   I looked away for a mere second and someone tackled me, I let out a loud yelp as I was thrown to the ground. Ponyboy let out a screech, clearly surprised at what just happened. I wiggled around, kicking the person, trying desperately to get them off of me, they pinned me to the grund though and I felt other loud footsteps around us, I was yelling at him to get off of mr but the only thing that came out of my mouth were loud grunts, everything was spinning around me, as I fought.

"Hey! What the hell is going on!?" I had heard Darry's voice boom from the bottom of the stairs and my breathing got heavy, he flicked the lights on and I had to squint my eyes a bit to get adjusted to the bright light in the room. As I looked to thd person above me, I couldn't help but roll my eyes, of course it was Dally, and Steve had Ponyboy against the wall. Dallas scrambled up, his eyes cold.

"I thought you guys were burglars or something," Dally sighed and scatched the back of his neck.

"Me too," Steve gulped and released his hold on Ponyboy and we both jumped to each other, holding his arm, we sat on the sofa and faced away from everyone's eyes. I could feel countless stares stab into my back, making me shiver uncomfortably. I didn't like attention, I hated it.

"Would you please stop staring," My eyes were closed tight and my voice sounded strange, sounded vulnerable and frightened.

"Ponyboy. . . " Darry whispered, and he looked up warily. "What happened to you?" His voice shook as he sat on the couch on the opposite side of the wall, facing us. The gang then sat down too, tiredness was shown in everyone's eyes, making me feel slightly guilty.

"I'm okay," Pony fiddled with his fingers as he spoke, afraid of meeting his brother's eyes.

"How's it feel like to be a pathetic junkie," Dally spoke up then and I flinched. I didn't like being called that, at all whatsoever. It made my stomach twist in rage, and I glared at him with all my might, he tensed up a little, taking me by surprise but only fueling my anger.

"You know what Dally, I have had it with you at this point-" I was cut off by him laughing at me,

"Oh! He speaks?!" I stood up then, going up to him. I swung my fist against his cheek with every ounce in my being, I shook my hand a little to try and get rid of the shooting pain in my knuckles, making them throb.

"You little fuck-" He was about to launch at me before Steve and Two-bit held the two of us back.

"Stop it! Stop it, stop it, stop it!" Soda screamed beside us, sobbing a little. His arms were at his sides and he clenched his fists tightly, breathing heavily.

"Enough of all the god damn fighting! Can't we just fucking talk without getting worked up over it?! Dally! Stop making fucking comments like that and you won't get fucking suckerpunched! And Johnny! Chill out! We don't have to fight!" He was a blunbering mess and I looked at Ponyboy as Steve released me, his eyes were glistening as he looked at his brother, his idol, his protector.

"Whats there to say? I'm sure you put two and two together right?" I asked him, sniffling a little. I wiped my nose and sat back down on the couch. I was visibally shaking violently, the both of us were.

"How long?" Darry tried to pick up the questions again.

"I don't know," Pony muttered,

"What do you mean you don't-"

"I don't remember okay?" He snapped, making Darry sigh.

"Was it when you two left? Or. . . before that?"

"Remember the time when you couldn't find us for over three days, that was just the first time. . . " I didn't dare look up, I didn't wanna meet anyone's gaze,

"And you've been doing it since then?" Two bit's voice was extremely shaky, and he tried to hold a little back.

"Yes." Pony spoke and eveeything went quiet, everyone's thoughts were everywhere. I could almost feel the anger in the room, the sorrow, the betrayal, it was almost unreal at how much everything seemed.

   This isn't ever going to end is it?

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