Broken Faith ✓

Chapter 20: Overpowered by Love

We had just finished our lunch and were sitting around talking and having a laugh. 

I was chewing the side of my mouth again trying to mull over if I should do this or not. I couldn't get myself to tell them about what went on at home but I could at least try and tell them this. I loved these girls and it was time to show them I trusted them too just like they loved and trusted me. 

But what if I regretted telling them? No one likes living with regret especially when it's the kind that is caused because you really shouldn't have let out a secret. 

I just needed to buck up and do this! 

"Guys I have to tell you something" I spoke quickly. 

"Is everything okay Faith?" Katy asked me. 

"Yeah I just have something to tell you but I don't know how to" I picked at the bench.

"Are you okay Faith?" Ariana asked with a hand on my shoulder. 

I looked up at them "Just promise me you won't tell anyone" 

"We promise" Anna said as she looked at everyone and they all nodded in agreement.

They all proceeded to look at me "What is it Faith?" Georgia asked hesitantly. 

"I like Ryder" I mumbled quickly and quietly. 

"What? We couldn't hear you" Anna said seriously. 

Really? They were going to make me say it again? I gritted my teeth slightly "I said I think I like Ryder" 

"Ohhhh! That" Anna waved at me dismissing me "Of course we knew that! You guys wave to each other and you have never talked about anyone more than you have about him. That was bound to happen" Anna shrugged her shoulders casually. 

"Yeah we never heard the end of it!" Georgia laughed. 

"So you aren't surprised?" I asked bewildered. 

"Nope" Katy smiled at me. 

"But I hated the guy!" I reasoned. 

"You hated him so much that it was obviously going to happen, after all there's a thin line between love and hate" Ariana winked at me and grinned.

"Just don't go telling anyone okay?" I warned them all. 

Anna scoffed "Of course we won't" she flicked her hair behind her "but that doesn't mean we won't tease you about it from time to time" Anna rubbed her hands together and laughed menacingly. 

I groaned and dropped my head into my hands. Boy, was I in trouble.  

***

My laughter bubbled out as I was bent over laughing holding my stomach and my cheeks hurt. Not from clenching them for so long, or from colourful patterns, that both usually denoted something sinister. No, this time they hurt from laughing. He was making me laugh. 

The very person that had become the centre of my being quite literally. He had seamlessly paved his way courageously to my heart. There were obstacles and my reluctance, there was me shutting all the doors he so effortlessly opened. There was me trying to use every piece of my consciousness to shut him out, and yet my unconscious loved slipping up in front of him. I tried to choose not to love him. I really tried. But he made it past all the thorns, all the black holes in my being and began to reside in my heart. 

Without even touching a part of my body this boy had managed to claim my heart. He made his way into it consuming my heart wholly and he wasn't leaving. Without ever even laying his lips or fingers on my skin, he claimed me. They say when you get intimate with someone it deepens your feelings. I felt myself fall deeper with every second I spent with him without him ever getting in close proximity to me. How was this even possible? Having someone consume your mind and heart without him ever consuming your body?