seahorses and crabs

Hiding

Karkat pov:

The weeks flowed past like a river and before I knew it, christmass was all over the place. The school was buzzing, everyone was talking about what they were going to do over their winter break and weather or not they were going to the dance the school was having. I just let everything rush over me without caring all that much, I just wanted to do my school work and have minimal contact with anyone. No one seems to notice I was hiding my arms more than usual, guess wearing a hoodie all the time wouldnt let onto anything seen as though I always wear something that covers my arms. Of course I didn't always keep to myself, I just did it a little more often. I would hang out with Sollux and Terezi most of the time and alternate between my fellow gamers who played the gog awfull spurb with me. They dont even have a clue about whats going on with me, and I dont intend on letting them know. It's my problem that I alone have to deal with.

Anyway, im in H.E at the moment and we have to actually cook today. Finnaly, after weeks of just writing. I listen to my teacher for the instructions

"Alright class, get on your aprons and roll up your sleeves, wash your hands and if any of you have long hair please tie it back." Mrs Brown says simply, I feel my heart stop. Sleeves ..up?

Of course you need to have your sleeves up Karkat! How could you be so stupid to forget the obvious rule about the sleeves? I need to figure out a way to keep my arms covered so that no one sees the cuts. I go up to Mrs Brown

"Excuse me Mrs brown but uh... is there any possibility that I could keep my sleeves down? "

"Karkat, if I let you have your sleeves down everyone will complain why they arent allowed theirs down. Also its to stop food from getting onto your clothes, were only looking out for you this way" she explains, I roll my eyes.

I feel everyones eyes on my as I try to reason with the teacher, the weight of their gaze making it feel like I have a truck crushing me. I finnaly agree to just observe the lesson and write down notes along with someone who forgot their money to pay for the cooking. It's only a pound to cook. I sit next to the human and start writing, not bothering to start up a conversation as they seem pretty pissed off about not being able to do the practical. All throughout the lesson I get side glances from the other pupils and sometimes even the teacher. Hiding the fact that i cut just got so much harder than I originally thought it would be. At the end of the lesson the pupils doing the cooking finish their candycane flavoured cupcakes and leave the class as the bell rings, as I head for the door Mrs Brown stops me

" Karkat, I would like to speak with you if you dont mind. I'll write a note for your next teacher explaining you were having a talk with me"

She explains and my throat goes dry as I mentally panic that she found out I cut. But I can't say no to a teacher, so I agree and wait as all the other students leave the cooking classroom. I look at Mrs brown, she was sitting at her little table with a computer. She points at a chair and tells me to take a seat. I nervously sit down and look at my teacher. She looks at me with a serious expression

"Karkat, is there anything you would like to talk about with me?"

"....no?"

" You dont sound so sure "

"I dont know what you want me to say miss"

"Well, I'd like you to explain why at the beguining of the term you were begging to skip all the writing part of the course and skip right to the actual cooking, and when we have our first cooking lesson you wont do a simple task of rolling up your sleeves and end up missing out on the cooking"

I gulp silently " Well miss.. uh you see...."

"You dont have to tell me anything that you dont want to, but i think it would be best"

I stay silent as I go over the scenarios of telling and not telling her. Everything seems to be favouring the not telling side. So I sigh and keep the secret I have been keeping for the past couple of months. I smile at the teacher convincingly

"Nothings wrong miss, its just that I think its a little cold to not have my arms covered. You see ...mutants.... like me uh, they're more sensative to the elements such as cold and rain. Much like how the sea dwellers cant really stand heat well"

I explain what I remember my dad telling me. Mrs Brown nods slowly

"Alright, if thats the case I suppose I can let you cook with your sleeves down, but it had to be under armour, do you understand?"

I nod fast and she lets me go to my next class with a note explaining where I was. I hand it to my P.E teacher, Mr Ampora. He reads over the letter and nods, telling me to quickly get changed for the lesson. Im glad the changing room has little compartments where you can change in private if your to socialy awkward or nervous. I change into my thin but long sleeved shirt and joggers, most of the other boys have the same clothing decision as me.

The rest of the day goes by as normal, do work, get bullied, go home. The only class I enjoyed was P.E because it was dodge ball, meaning I could throw balls at my bullies and not get in trouble for it. Of course my team won, well... it wasnt my  team but it was still the team I was in. I think no one really understands Mr Ampora's past because everyone kept trying to hit him, at one point he knocked a kid out just by throwing a ball at his head. Dont worry, the kids still alive, but a bit loopy after what happened. When that happened though the whole class echoed a

" wow!"

And Mr Ampora just stood there like he won a gold medal, that made me laugh. Dualscar is by far my favourite teacher, he doesnt take any nonsense from anyone and will stand up for a kid who is going through some tough times. Hes a relaxed teacher but also very hard working, all teachers should take a lesson from him about how teaching should be handled. At the end of the day I walk home in a large warm jacket but not so large it looks as if im a fat arse, large as in it keeps me really warm. I also have a red hat and gloves along with a gryffindor scarf on. I was so bored one day and I started watching that harry potter eridan is always talking about and I grew obsessed with it in a matter of three movies. As I walk home in the snow I let my mind wander as a light snowfall starts.  My mind wanders to eridan.... again. Its happened so often now I've stopped questioning it. I think about how much hes changed from the arrogant ass he used to be when we started playing the game and how he is now. He hardly insults low bloods ( unless its sollux ) and hes more pleasant to be around. I think about how his family could have played a part in this transfermation. His brother Cronus, the one who wants to be a human, hardly ever insults blood colour as he understands humans have red blood and consider it normal. His dad, Dualscar, after he died my dad tells me that he sailed around, sometimes even helping other trolls. I start to realize that not all royals are giant ass holes. I mean feferi is still delightful as always, even with her annoying bitch ass mother and sister. I loose controll of my thoughts as my mind focuses on eridan. How his smile seems to light up the whole area hes in, how his laugh is contagious, his wonderful purple eyes and how they shine, his cute fins that twitch every so often, his dorky but cute way of dressing, how wonderful his personality is now that hes matured. A light blush comes across my face as I smile, not taking note of the being infront of me, who I colide right into.