You Will Be Found || Lams || COMPLETED

🌬wild thoughts ~ chapter 3🌬

I woke up with a pounding headache. I slowly fluttered my eyes open and groaned in pain. My arms were wrapped around Peggy. I gently unwind myself from her to rub my temples. Everything still a groggy haze, I sit up. Goddamn, my head is hurting so badly. I need to find some Advil or
something.

I begin to step out of bed, but then Peggy grabs my arm. I turn around and almost leap, for it wasn't Peggy who was sleeping at my side, but a shirtless Alexander.

"Alex?" I gasp, startled. I noticed that I was naked; I grabbed the white sheets to cover myself. "What the hell are you doing in my bed?"

He furrows his brows, a concerned expression taking over his face. He sits up, and I notice that he didn't have pants on as well like me. "Do you not remember last night? You weren't even drunk."

"What the fuck," I muttered and quickly hopped out of bed. I hastily grab the knob to my dressing drawer, the handle cold to the touch, and it sends shivers down my spine. I randomly throw on a pair of grey sweatpants. I ran my hands through my hair as he sat on my bed, perplexed.

"We didn't do anything last night," I ask, but it sounded more like a statement to convince myself that nothing happened.

"W-We did," He stuttered, "I'm sorry. Did you not enjoy it?"

"That's not the point!" I snapped, "I'm a straight man. Who's in a 7 year committed relationship! If Peggy finds out, she's going to fucking freak!"

"I already know," A familiar feminine voice says. I turn around, and there stood Peggy at the doorway, looking distraught.

"Baby..." I coax, grabbing her hands in mine, "It's not what you think-"

She forcefully pulls away. "I thought you loved me."

"I do!" I yell after he as she aggressively walks into the living room.

"Then why'd you have sex with Alexander?" She cries, tears rimming her eyes. "You know what? I'm done-"

"Peggy, please-"

"I'm done with your stupid ass, Laurens. Done!" She walks into the corridor that leads to the door. She picks up an already packed yellow suitcase and unlocks the door. "You can be happy and stay here, because fuck what I think, right?"

"Peggy, that's not-"

"Goodbye, John!" She throws the house key to my chest. "I hope you have fun being his little boy toy."

She slams the door in my face, and the dorm is silent. I stand there for a moment, her key in my hand.

"Peggy," I weakly mutter as I drop to my knees. I lean my back against the wall and pull at my hair in rage.

"Bullshit!" I cry out, hot tears spilling, rolling down my face. A dark vinaigrette wraps around my vision, and I see taunting shadows slowly towering over me. Over and over in my head, I hear You fucked up you fucked up you fucked up you fucked up you fucked up you fucked up being spoken by various different friends like Angelica, Lafaytette, Hercules, and Eliza. The shadows are getting closer, taunting me more and more. My heart is pounding in my chest, and I don't know if I'm yearning the touch of Peggy or Alexander.

"Peggy," I sob, hitting my head on the wall, a sharp pain running down my head and spine.

"John!" I hear a distant voice shout, but it's too late. The shadows and the demons are already too close. This is the end of me. "John!"

"John!" Peggy shouts, shaking me by my shoulders. I'm back in my bed. I look around precariously. I'm in my room, and Peggy is on top of me. I lay back down, panting heavily.

"Baby, are you okay?" She asks, laying on my chest, hugging me. 

"I- What the hell?" I stutter, short of breath. I run my fingers through Peggy's long curly hair. This comforts me.

"What happened?" She softly asks.

"Bad dream," I whisper back, kissing her on the head reassuringly.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She questions, caressing my chest gently and lovingly.

"No," I choke out.

"It might make you feel better?" She coaxes, her brown eyes fixated on mine. Her eyes resemble Alexander's.

"Maybe later," I lie, sitting up, leaning up against the head frame of the bed.

"Well, you kept saying my name," She explains sitting next to me, holding my hand. "And I got really scared."

"What did I say?" I panic, praying I didn't say a single word about Alexander.

"I don't know. You were just muttering stuff like 'Peggy, no' and 'Peggy, please.' It really scared me."

I turn towards her and give her a lopsided grin. "Well, you're okay and at my side right now. That's all that matters." I kiss her hand.

"It's 5:30am," She says. The orange puddle of light began to spill in through our window, dimming the room a dark auburn. "I have class at 6:15. I should get ready."

"You've never had a class that early," I say as she hops out of bed. She searches through her clothes in her drawer.

"I switched classes. Jefferson was in my period, so I switched to an earlier class," She explains as she pulls out a pastel yellow tank top and bright blue jeans that probably belonged to Eliza once.

"Makes sense," I laugh, getting out of bed as well. I look in my section of the drawer for underwear, pants, and a shirt. "I don't have class until this afternoon. I'll go to Panera or I'll make myself breakfast. I promise I won't burn the house down."

"I doubt it, but alright," She jokes, making her way out the door. "I'm hopping in the shower and picking up coffee on my way to class. I love you, John,"

"You too, Peggy," I say as I kiss her on the head. She enters the bathroom and I sit on the couch.

I take a long moment to think about my dream last night.

I presumably had sex with another man, a man that is going to move in with us soon. What the fuck?

I get so entranced in my thoughts, that I didn't even notice Peggy leaving. I brush my teeth and throw on my clothes. I didn't even attempt brushing my hair, so I put a navy beanie over it. I'm about to head out to get coffee until I pick up my phone off the counter. I open my conversation with Lafayette from the night before and stare at Alexander's number. I reluctantly press it and hold the phone up to my ear, my hands fidgeting. It's not until after four rings later I hear a familiar voice on the other line.

"It's Alexander Hamilton. Hello!"