Always & Forever (D. Swing)

Chapter 31.

Devyn

I've been spending about thirty minutes getting myself ready to hang out with Kobe while Leila helps with the decisions on what I should and what I shouldn't do incase I mess up about things. Instead of helping me, she's actually watching MTV on my television. I didn't know what to particularly wear, but it should be easy since it's a bit cold this time of year and dressing warm is always easy. But the thing is, I want to look cute for him. I never actually do this for people, though now I'm feeling the need to since I'm getting older. I'm finally taking my mom's advice on always looking presentable; it's a necessity. I just didn't like to pick out the clothes to wear because I'm very indecisive.

Kobe and I decided to go to the movies to see something new that was coming out. Some action movie about lethal? I didn't know exactly what it was but it sounds interesting because of the word 'lethal' itself. I'm not sure if we'd be watching the movie the whole time, but I'm certainly hoping I can at least see a little bit of it because I'd hate to waste money for no reason. Realizing Leila really isn't going to help me like she claim she was, I decide to just figure out what to wear on my own, while listening to whatever pop song was on the tv.

After that whole incident with Donald, I definitely wanted to go out with Kobe. He isn't anybody important in my life to dictate what I do with other people just because he might be slightly jealous. He thinks he has the authority to judge someone based on what he hears. He judges them as if he doesn't do the same thing, might possibly being worse than them because he's secretive about it. I honestly don't care about his whole 'I know I'm a horrible ass person speech' and 'I have a sense of who I am'. I don't believe that shit for a second. When I was comforting him that night when he was completely a wreck about being rejected by Prince, he didn't seem to sure of himself then. He was far from being at peace nor did he know what to do with himself. I'm the one who had to comfort him because it seemed like he was going to  cause trouble if someone didn't come to his rescue. I did everything. I know people can change, but I'm probably the one who made him find himself.

"I can't believe you're really about to go out with Kobe.. Like I'm completely shocked right now." Leila speaks up randomly, crunching on some food in my bed. "How does Donald feel about this?" Something triggers within me by her question and I stop searching through my closet. I close my eyes, taking a breather. I sigh again going back to what I was doing, not trying to say anything reckless.

"I don't know .. Who cares how he feels." I say too quickly for my own good. I try to move some of my pants on the clothes racket, though they're extremely heavy. "Ugh." I say to myself, feeling tired. "What do you mean who cares how he feels? That's your ex and Kobe is his friend, Devyn." I hear the bed move as she gets up from behind me. I jump once she taps my shoulder and I turn around facing her. I'm about three inches taller than her, but I still feel like I'm staring into a mirror.

"How do you know that? They're not friends." I suck my teeth, knowing she's just trying to talk. It seems to be she doesn't like anyone I go out with. "Before you knew him, he used to hang with Kobe because Dalvin would and they seemed pretty tight. Not best friends, but cool enough to call them friends." She explains to me.

"Okay..." I trail off, not really caring. Donald doesn't really even consider a lot of people his friends so why should this even matter. "Do you know how fucked up that is Devyn?" She questions me, squinting as if I said something stupid. I didn't think I did. I don't answer, waiting for her continue because I know she is. "I know he fucked with Shantelle and all to make you mad.. And I know I said don't run back to his ass because of that first incident with Michael, but I think he loved you, you know?" She exclaims with her hands out. "I've been around him for quite some time now because we know the same people. I never really talked to him though, but I've never seen him act so lively until you stepped into his life. I didn't know who was giving him pussy or whether his grades started improving because, woo," she raises her eyebrows, "those shits were bad. But it was something different about him those last few months of school. He was glowing and I don't even think boys glow."