Always & Forever (D. Swing)

Chapter 54.

Devyn

Breathing aggressively, I grasp onto the handles of the chair waiting. Staring around the miniature room sits a couple of other teens and young adults, ranging from ages thirteen to what I'm guessing twenty-one. I might even say one kid here might be eleven. Raising my eyebrows at the possibility of an eleven year old having a disease causes a reaction to happen in me internally. Sniffling to myself, I observe each person just wondering what they could be here for. A few different backgrounds and classes here are very apparent. Mostly lower class are here, a couple of middle class people, and maybe one or two upper class. I can just tell by the way they're dressing they have an exceeding amount of money. It's intriguing that no matter what exactly someone's upbringing is we all find ourselves in this small waiting room. We all have different stories and outlooks in life, never seeing each other before and never thinking we would but sadly something as tragic as this can affect all no matter the place in society. Nobody is excluded.

Hearing sniffles from the right side of the room, all of us glance towards the noise revealing the young eleven year old girl sobbing randomly with her face in her hands. The rips in her clothes are evident and the stains of dry blood splattered everywhere is hard to miss. The image of this brings me back to a time I don't want to remember. The way her clothes appear remind me of that day where everything went downhill for me. A day I never want to be reminded up but always forces itself back into my brain. And now seeing this young girl's appearance only makes me wonder what exactly happened. I don't want to be asinine and assume but the way she's crying and comes across can only make me do so. Wanting to go over there and comfort here, I grab onto the handles about to stand up before a hand places itself onto of mine. Startled by the touch, my eyes avert to the developing man I came with.

Frowning at him in confusion as I'm about to speak, he does before me, "Devyn." He shakes his head at me with pleading eyes. "I know you want to help her and comfort her but I don't think that's a good idea." Still not understanding his reasoning for saying this, I only stare at him with a bored expression. "Devyn, she may have something and could give it to you", he speaks lowly, "we have to stay away from these people."

Figuring he's right, I slide all the way back in the cold seat, gripping my hands around the handles waiting. We've been sitting the waiting room of a small clinic building that allows kids to come here without there parents knowing. As risky as it sounds, it's actually a good idea because most teens might be afraid of going to get tested without parents due to embarrassment and disappointment so they created this. Thankfully, I find this in time before D drove me insane with questions I don't know how to answer. The whole time we've been silent with one another waiting to be called by whomever.

Blinking rapidly, I almost have a panic attack at the tips of his fingers gliding across the upper part of face smearing liquid from my eyes. Raising my eyes at the action, I clear my throat not even noticing I was crying. "Thanks." I quietly speak, not wanting anyone else to hear what was going on although they probably saw the entire thing. Exhaling sharply, I avoid eye contact with him feeling embarrassed for revealing vulnerability in front of random people I've never seen in my life.

I always feel embarrassed when I don't particularly have a reason to. The whole thing that just happened probably means nothing to them because they're also mostly likely in a dampened mood about the possibility of having something that could affect them greatly. Maybe that's the thing I'm embarrassed about. A year and some change ago, I wouldn't even be thinking about me having a sexually transmitted disease, having nightmares about certain things, or coming to a clinic for underaged and young adults because out of fear that my dad would shame me. I don't even think he thought of me having the same disease she had. I think he knows but he doesn't want to admit it due to the way he's been reacting every time I brought it up. If I hadn't researched it out of curiosity, who knows what would've happened? Curiosity killed the cat, but this is a life or death situation therefore that doesn't matter. I have to know.