MIXED SIGNALS

Chapter 41 - Mending Fences

Hello there, beshies. The heat is unbearable, no? Stayed in the house all day because I was too lazy to dress up and go anywhere, but man the heat is unbearable! Hay, feels like summer, goodness. 

Anyway, question: do you feel that there's always a gap between parents and their children, regardless of the generation? I know that my parents have a very different view of things, such that we do not see eye to eye on a lot but have learned to respect each other's viewpoints because they acknowledge that as an adult, I deserve their respect. 

I feel though, that my generation has a better relationship with our kids, mostly because our parenting styles are intentionally different from how we were brought up, in order to adjust to the changing times. Maybe that's why millennials act the way they do, because they have been nurtured more and hence feel a sense of entitlement because their parents raised them to believe they are special.

Regardless of the difference of opinion, parents deserve respect and time. My parents are so happy to see me and my family everytime we visit them, it moves me to tears how a simple visit is like a rare gift to them. 

Visit your parents, guys. Give them time and hug them whenever you can. My parents were not huggers, but ever since I started hugging them every time we get ready to leave, they now reach for me and enjoy the physical closeness.  And I tell you, it feels good :)

Enjoy reading my dears, weekend na naman bukas, yehey :)

A week after Alden and Janine talked, Maine called up her parents for the first time in three years. Although she went home for the holidays, she usually stayed in a hotel and just came to see them on Christmas eve to give her gifts and spend the night to have Christmas lunch with them the next day. There was never time for them to talk about things that were set aside for better days to talk about, until the gap between them widened into a chiasm that became awkward to bring up.

For the most part, her parents were civil, asking perfunctory questions about her job, how she was and when she was coming back. But the reason for their falling out was never mentioned. It was considered an embarrassment for both sides already.

Years ago when Maine had just graduated from college, her parents thought she would not amount to much because she was not as pretty as her sister, nor was she as bright as her brother. To be fair, her parents were after her best interests when they wanted to pair her off with her father's best friend's son, Raymond. So they set up both for dinner, letting both tag along on the pretext of discussing a possible business venture that could involve both of them.

The night ended with Raymond and Maine being left behind by the parents to get to know each other. Both were attracted to each other, they dated for a while and were at that stage where a relationship was possible. Until Raymond saw Maine talking to a male batchmate, yelled at her in public and dragged her to his car. Whatever hopes she had for romance between them was wiped away by fear, and she avoided him since then.

The parents tried to repair the damage, but Maine would not budge. She felt that the incident was an eye-opener, a peek into what life might be like if she and Raymond would finally end up together. Reluctantly, she told her parents flat out that she would never go out with Raymond again, and the decision sparked a rift between her dad and Raymond's father. Business between the two men was never the same, her dad lost a valued client and a good friend, because he claimed his son was embarrassed by Maine's flirting with another man.

To this day, it was unclear to Maine if her dad believed her story that she was not flirting. All she remembered was the disappointed look on his face as she told them of her decision to relocate to Manila and packed her things. The cold treatment got to her, to a point of feeling isolated during family gatherings. She thought it best to lick her wounds elsewhere.

Today, she was seated beside Alden on this mid-morning flight to Davao, about to face her mother and father, and introduce Alden and his parents. She did not tell them about Alden's parents yet, but merely said she was introducing someone to them. Her mom merely nodded on Facetime, her dad was just quiet.

"Hey........everything ok?" Alden took her hand between both of his, noting how cold it was. She told him everything before they left, and it made him feel bad that someone so sweet and giving had to go through a rift with parents.

"Yes. It's just that....we're not really close lately and I don't know what kind of reception we'll get when we arrive. Nahihiya ako sayo, your parents were really warm and welcoming."

"Everything will be ok. What happened with Raymond was a long time ago. They're over it by now, you just need to talk about it."

"I don't know how to do that. Parang we didn't talk about it na lang to avoid hurting each other. My dad lost a valuable contact for government contracts, millions actually. Raymond's father was a big contractor who always subcontracted work to my dad. He passed on all projects to someone else because of what happened."

"It's not your fault, Maine."

"Maybe. But that doesn't change the fact that my dad lost a good friend."

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They checked in at Marco Polo Hotel and went out to buy some souvenirs to pass the time. They went back to the hotel late afternoon to get ready for their dinner with her parents at Lotus Court, the hotel's Cantonese restaurant.

Her parents arrived past 6:00 in the evening, dressed formally in dinner clothes. Her mom was elegant in a black lace dress while her father was in a suit. She was wearing a red dress while Alden was in a blue blazer, white shirt and khaki pants.

Her parents have always been the kind of old school parents who didn't mingle too much with their children. They were conservative, engrossed in business and rarely made small talk with her and her siblings. She was always on guard with them, because they never really complimented her much, nor did they criticize her.

"Mom.....Dad....." She took their hand one after another and raised it to her forehead as a typical sign of respect. "Si Alden po.......boyfriend ko......Alden, my parents."

"Pleased to meet you sir.....ma'am." Alden shook their hands. "I reserved a table for us po...."

He took Maine's hand, almost defiantly, holding on to it despite Maine's initial reluctance to let him do so. They sat at a corner table and were occupied for the first few minutes, ordering food for dinner. After that was out of the way, they all were faced with an awkward silence. Her father cleared his throat and spoke.

"Maine.....I see your rings, and if I'm not mistaken, Alden is your fiance, not just your boyfriend. Parang biglaan ata na engaged na kayo just like that. How long have you been together at engaged na kayo? Are you pregnant?"