The Winter Soldier is Still Here (Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier x reader)

Always on My Mind

READER POV
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The next morning I awoke to a bitterly cold morning. My windows appeared to have been danced across by the frost faeries, creating beautiful yet frigid designs for my viewing pleasure. I laid in bed and looked out the window before turning my attention to the wall and how you could still see the remnants of those designs streaming in from the sun. I pulled my hair above my head and laid it to fan across the pillow behind me and positioned my hands under my head. After a few moments, I rolled over and grabbed my laptop off of the floor and my phone from the nightstand. A classmate had text me and said class was canceled today. I had the day off. I decided I was just going to relax in whatever way I saw fit. I would take each moment as it came and decide in that moment today. At the time, I was just feeling laying in bed, scrolling through Tumblr, until I felt like moving. As I scrolled, I chuckled at the funny posts I saw. I went on the "don't waste a day" tag and felt inspired to get up and get moving. I decided to take a quick look at my email first in case my professor had sent anything that I may need to know to do before class again on Friday considering I was working a double again tomorrow. I saw all of the junk mail, but nothing from my professor. I was just about to close my computer until an email caught my eye. The subject read "Update" from an address named csr107th@gmail.com

I sat up quickly, nerves crawling out of my pores and across my skin. Could it be? My hand shook as I reached for the mouse, scrolling over and clicking it open. My eyes flashed to the bottom first. It was as I thought, Steve. "Why would he be emailing me? And what would an update be about? ....it'd have to be about Bu-" I still couldn't say his name aloud without it hurting and stopping in my throat. "How does he even get my email address," I continued questioning as if someone was there listening. I didn't know if I was prepared for this, not yet. I made a rash decision to quickly mark it unread and slammed my computer shut so I couldn't decide any differently. I quickly got up and started getting ready so I could get out of the house. The day looked as though it'd be a beautiful one, even if cold. I decided that I needed to change my location, get to a higher altitude and clear my head. I dressed in warm layers so as to be able to peel if needed. After a cup of coffee brewed, water bottles filled, and snack bars grabbed, I headed for Kasper to quickly take me away from town and hopefully to a more transparent and empty headspace.

I decided to take 501 to catch the scenic route of Coleman Falls and ride along the James River. When I got to the Blue Ridge Parkway, I hesitated, deciding whether to turn right to go North or left to go South. I finally decided on right when another vehicle came up behind me. I drove for a while, unsure of where I was even headed. I just drove. I cracked the windows, turned the heat on full blast, and turned the music up in an attempt to drown out the noise inside my head. I skipped everything happy and upbeat, choosing instead to listen to anything slow and serene. I drove through the curves, pulling off as necessary to let quicker paced drivers around me. Once I reached Montebello, it seemed like the right place. I drove up to the pull-off where there was a sign for the Appalachian Trail. Once I parked, grabbed my bag and battery pack for my phone, I stuck my headphones in, locking Kasper, and began to make my ascent.

BUCKY POV
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I walked to the apartments where I used to live but I didn't see (y/n)'s vehicle. "She must be at work," I thought. I decided to catch the bus that way so I could see. She was always working, I swear, she never stopped, despite how unhealthy it was for her. She had always said she did it because not only did she need to, but for the first time in a long time, she enjoyed her job so she didn't mind being there constantly. Plus, she always added, "since I haven't made many friends outside of work, I don't have a reason to miss it or to be off all the time." "It doesn't make it any more healthy, though, (y/n)," I would always try to convince her. "I'll survive. My mental health is much better than it used to be, so I already consider myself more healthy," she would counter, knowing she had just won the argument. We never really argued per say, what other people would consider arguing, but it was more of a chilled debate. Of course, the only argument we had ever had was the night the Winter Soldier won over and messed her up...