Beginning of the End

XLV

When I reached the back gate, the sun was setting. I opened the gate and stepped, only to see Audrey and Wisconsin walking towards me.

"Where the hell have you been?" Audrey asked, concerned.

"I went down to the dam." I said, slightly confused.

"Jesus, you nearly gave us a heart attack." Lamar clutched his chest, sighing with relief.

"I'm fine, damn. Even if I wasn't, you all know the plan, Jed takes over with Lamar as his right hand." They both rolled their eyes at me.

"You know we hate thinking about that." Audrey said.

"It's a possibility." I shrugged, walking towards Inventory.

"Nope, not an option." Lamar shook his head. I rolled my eyes as I stepped inside and put my weapon up and signed the paper.

"Your dad dropped a plate of food off at your house," Audrey crossed her arms, "You need to go talk to him. He's worried about you."

"Yeah, okay, sure," I nodded. She smiled and walked off. I turned to Lamar, "Hey, have you ever came across any nomads out there?"

"Probably, we've seen people before. Usually they're assholes and we end up having to kill them, but..." He looked at me, suspiciously, "Why?"

"Well, while I was in my clearing, I met one. He offered me food. Told me he usually kills wanderers, but it didn't feel right to kill 'a little girl.'" I chuckled.

"Ziggles, you could have been hurt! Are you stupid?!" He rubbed his temples in irritation.

"Wisconsin, in case you haven't noticed, I'm still in one piece. Not a scratch on me." I held my arms out, showing him.

"Sure, this time. But what if Chris sent him???" Lamar said in a hushed whisper.

"Oh, trust me, thought crossed my mind, Pretty sure Nomad thinks I'm insane. I drew an arrow on him, asking who sent him, and he was just, dumbfounded," I turned to him, "Do I look sick?"

"What?" He asked, taken aback.

"Well, the nomad said I looked sick, like malnourished. Do I?" I asked.

"Yeah... You do. You look kind of like a skeleton... That's why we're all worried."

"I'll be okay, Wisconsin. I have to be," I hugged him, "That way we can win." He hugged me back.

"I hope so, Ziggles." He patted me on the back and walked off to his trailer. I nodded and made my way home too. As I was walking through the center of Community, I noticed people staring at me. Did I look that bad? I sped up and walked home. Once inside, closing my door behind me. I began to strip from my clothes, until I was in nothing but my bra and underwear. I walked into my room and stood in front of my full length mirror. I gasped at what I saw. I could see hipbones, ribs, knee caps. My thighs didn't touch. My thighs... I looked over the scars from the deep cuts that were made over the last month. The criss-crossing pattern that looked silvery white against my newly pale complexion. I brought my eyes up to the reflection of my face. My eyes seemed sunken in, as well as my cheeks. I turned away and put on pajamas. I sighed as I walked back into my living room, picking up the plate of food my dad left on my table. Rice and pepper steak, with green peppers. I smiled and began to eat. I never noticed how hungry I was. I felt like I haven't eaten in weeks, probably because I barely have. I finished my plate, placing it in my sink. I walked into my room and sat on my bed. Tonight would be the first night since Alek died that I wouldn't look through my photo album.