when i was a little girl, i was lead to believe that pale equaled beauty; that the lighter your skin complexion was, the more beautiful you were. actors and actresses and in between here in the philippines almost all had pale skin, which resembled the exact color of white people — the people we, honestly, strived to be. because of this, i grew self-conscious about the way i was physically born, but my insecurities only started to have a big impact in this one moment i had in conversing with my elders. at that time, my sister was right beside me, joining in the conversation, and someway somehow the topic of beauty came up and that was when it all started to turn to shit (basically). the people who i was taught to respect, aka my elders, began to compliment my sister's naturally pale color (for a filipino), and seeing as i was the opposite, one of the older folk pointed out about it - in a harsh tone. like she was sort of saying "smh, i can't help how you were born but gosh get a skin whitening lotion or something" to me but not really. what eventuated from that for me as a person was insecurities about my skin color, which presently now looking back at it, is extremely depressing. i remember that before i spotted a skin whitening lotion in a grocery store and thinking, "i should get that; maybe then i'll look beautiful," which fucks me up now. a lot of boys and girls and genderless people probably all over the world were taught at a very young age to hate the way they were naturally born, and it's so fucking unfortunate and unnecessary which fuels me up with anger for i was a past victim of exactly that. well guess what? now that i have matured i've began to embrace my skin color because i had a change of heart and a much needed euphony, which was:
all skin complexions are beautiful ! not one should be placed higher above another because at the end of the day we're all human, and if we're beautiful on the inside then we're beautiful regardless of physical appearances ! embrace the way you look, for you are lovely !
tbh that was a mini rant but i hope i got the message across in the way i wanted it too. i hate most of myself but if i had to pick one aspect about myself that i can actually tolerate, it would be the shade of my skin :")) i don't know, the color is pretty neat and i like how it sets me aside from about most of my online friends
don't be ashamed that you're not like this or like that because honestly i like just the way you are
