I felt like this was the year to find myself. Yeah, that sounded really cheesy and weird, but I wanted to know who I was as a person. I hung around Anna because she was the one there for me during Lilly's "wrath". And I wanted to hang out with the eighth graders, beacsue they seemed genuinely nice. The year progressed very slowly and I hated it.
It wasnt even my birthday yet and Anna and I were already arguing, I honestly cannot remember the reason, but I found it stupid and felt horiible over it. I think it was because I was hanging out with the eighth graders more than her now. I told her the reason I was hanging out with them was because I had grown close to them and it was their last year at Saint Joseph's, which wasnt a lie, but it wasnt the real reason. I started getting pissed at her for liking the same things I did and for acting somewhat like me, but the thing was that I was rubbing off on her. She started getting dirty minded and liking YouTubers and it all had started to annoy me. Yea, I had someone who liked me enough, or hung around me enough, to start acting like me. But I never really liked anyone copying me. When my younger cousins copy me, to be honest, I want to strangle them. And when I tell them to be quiet, Im the one who gets in trouble.
So I started hanging out with the eighth graders more and my class less, just like last year with Lilly. This year, I could tell was different, the people were different. At least I was hoping they were. I mean, they seemed different compared to Lilly, they didnt seem as arrogant as Lilly did. I soon learned that they were nothing like LIlly, and I liked that I felt that I could trust them.
Although I had started out talking to them on twitter through Kim, I starte hanging out with Kacey and Christina at school, first. They were cool and were nice and good friends just in general. I slowly started hanging out with more of their class. I avoided Lydia, still pissed at her for last year and didnt really want to start anything. I heard that she talked shit about my class at lunch, sometimes me, but I just avoided it.
The person I heard the information from was Anna. Anytime she told me that Lydia talked about either of us, she said she stood up for me. I dont doubt that, it's just by this time I didnt care and was done with Lydia's bullshit. She could "walk all over me" by insulting me, but she never insulted things I cared too much about so she didnt so much damage as she thought she. Which is why I never really cared what she said about me. If I just avoided her, she could say things about me and never know that it never really bothered me and still feel good becasue she thought she had made someone feel bad about themselves.
If there was anything that bothered me out of all she said, it was that I was a lesbian. Not that I cared that she called me that, but more the fact that it made me think of "lesbianest(...idk how to spell that, so...)" and that made me think of LIlly, who didnt put me in the best mood to think about.
(A/N:
Heeeyyy guises!!! Yea, pretty shitty update about half way through. Also, sorry about how long it took me to update. I was going to update a few days ago, but I just couldnt think of the right words and everything and yea... I felt that if I was going to update, I might as well at least try my best. So this is what you got.
BY THE WAY.
Go check out my friend's book, it's sort of an autobiography and yea... His username is its_awkward .... Idk what else to say...
I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I am trying to update when it is convenient for me and it would still be a good enough chapter.
Also, the science fair was this past Wednesday and I GOT A FRUCKING ONORABLE MENTION. ARE ADJAS KDJA LKFJ LKAJLFK YOU FUCKING WITH ME? I WORKED AT MOST FIVE HOURS ON THE ENTIRE THING, report and display board, AND I GOT A FUCKING HONORABLE MENTION FROM THE DAMN JUDGES. Damn, Im good. lol, jk.
I love you guys! Bai :3 MWUAH! Xx. Tara)
