Rigid Crow

Feeling Anything At All

A couple of hours later, a nurse approached us and asks, "Are you here for Hinata Shōyō?" The team, everyone who's with us, and Hinata's family immediately stand up.
Natsu now asleep in her arms, and her husband standing next to her, Hinata-sama asks, "Is our son okay?"
The nurse answers cautiously, "The operation is complete, and it all went as planned, which is a good thing. However, Hinata-san has fallen into a coma of a permanent vegetative stage. We ran some tests, and he's ranked a 4 on the Glasgow Coma Scale."
"Is that bad?" Ennoshita-senpai asks warily, concern wedged into his voice.
"Yes, I'm sorry," the nurse responds, a frown on his face. "The scale is ranked from 3-15. The only reason Hinata-san ranked above a three is because he is making some rigid twitching movements at times, which is better than nothing."
"But will he wake up?" Hinata-sama asks, clutching onto her husband, her face pale.
"It's not at all likely, but only time will tell. The more time that goes by, the less of a chance of his recovery. We can only hope," the nurse smiles compassionately. How he can smile after breaking news like that, I'll never understand. I know he's trying to be considerate to us, but I just want to slap that smile off his face.
"Can we see him?" I ask, my knuckles turning white with the fists I've made.
"Yes, but only a few at a time. Perhaps four at most. Follow me." As our large group travels down the halls of the building, the only sound around us is the regular bustle of the hospital. Finally, the nurse stops us in front of a room. "Would the patient's family like to visit first?"
"Yes," Hinata's father answers, his wife looking unable to speak. Their daughter stirs, mumbling incomprehensible words. Then, they disappear inside the room with the nurse at their heels.
     It's quiet in the hall. None of us speak. I steal glances at my team members. Most of them are looking at the floor. The others's eyes are looking at the shut door.
What does a person in a coma look like? I'm not prepared to go in. I don't want to see him like that. It shouldn't have been him. So many people care about him! So many people are here for him. If I had been the one hurt... how many people would be here for me? Would the entire team have stayed? Maybe... Would my whole family wait hours just to see me? I don't know...
Before I know it, the nurse comes out of the room, Hinata's family right behind him. Hinata-sama is choking back sobs, tear tracks on her face. Hinata-san looks like he's having trouble holding it together. Natsu walks between them, drowsy, but now awake. "Why Onii-chan there?" She asks naively. "He always get up and tell me 'go away' when he sleep and I talk. He sick?"
"Yes, Natsu-tan," Hinata-san says, his voice tight. "Come on, darling, it's time to go home. It's late." It is? I check my watch. Oh no. My parents aren't going to be happy. I check my cell phone. Five missed calls. Shoot! You know what? I'll face them when I get home. This is much more important right now.
Hinata-sama suddenly bows before us before the family leaves. "Arigatō!" she thanks us. "Shōyō would appreciate you all being here." She stands back up, then walks back to her family, tears falling from her eyes. When they turn the corner, the nurse asks for four more people.
"Kageyama, would you like to go?" Suga asks me, concerned.
"Not yet," I answer almost at once. I need to wait a few minutes...
"Alright," Sawamura-san decides. "How about all the third years go? That makes four of us." Everybody agrees. So Daichi, Suga, Asahi, and Shimizu follow the nurse into the room.
Yachi has gotten ahold of herself. She whispers to me, "Kageyama, are you alright?" She looks worried for my sake.
"Yeah," I murmur back. "W-why wouldn't I be?" I begin to stutter.
"It's okay to feel something, Kageyama. We're all here for you, you know."
"That's the thing, Yachi. I'm feeling so many things, I don't know if I'm feeling anything at all," I respond truthfully.
     She doesn't know how to respond. Soon enough, the third years come out of the room. Asahi's trembling. He's always jittery, but he seems more shaken up than usual. Daichi's keeping his cool well, but I can tell that he's upset. Suga is pressed to his side, his face mimicking Sawamura-san's expression.
     Ennoshita, Narita, and Kinoshita go in next. Noya-san looks to Asahi and asks, "So? Did the doctors say anything?"
     "Noya," Asahi-senpai tries to interrupt, but Noya-san doesn't stop.
     "What did he look like? Did he look kind of okay?" Nishinoya continues, rambling.
     "Noya."
     "Do they know anything more? What's going on in there? Are they doing anyth..."
     "Yuu!" Asahi snaps, interrupting Noya, who finally stops, then Asahi cowers. "Sorry, I didn't mean to raise my voice... Just... wait until you get in there. I don't want to talk about it."
     The other three second years return. Ennoshita-san places a hand on Kinoshita's shoulder. Narita keeps mumbling the phrase 'I don't know' under his breath. Kinoshita takes his hand and tells him that things are going to be okay. I know Narita has had panic attacks in the past, but he should never have had one over something like this, because something like this never should have happened. Everyone's reacting in such different ways. How will I take it?
     Coach, Sensei, Noya, and Tanaka go next. Saeko says she doesn't want to go in. She'll just take her brother home when he's ready.
     Yamaguchi looks in my direction and we make eye contact for a second. I don't think he's ready to go in either. He looks away and mumbles something to Tsukishima, who murmurs something in return. Yamaguchi holds onto Tsukishima's shirt. Tsukishima doesn't push him away like he might normally do. I think, inside, he's just as nervous as the rest of us are.
     The second years, Coach, and Sensei come out of the room. The corners of Noya's mouth are trembling and he rubs his eyes furiously. Tanaka goes to his sister; they say a brief farewell, and leave. Others begin to leave as well. Narita and Kinoshita say short goodbyes and leave after them. Their parents came to pick them up. Shimizu apologizes, telling us her parents are waiting on her as well and she must get home.
     Now, it's time for the first years to go in... I'm a first year. The nurse leads Yachi, Yamaguchi, and Tsukishima in. I'm the last one to enter.
     I freeze in the doorway. Oh gosh.
     Hinata.