I feel awful, I feel really really bad and I really really wish I didn't and I really really hate it, and I hate being here and I hate t h e m I hate them so much it hurts and I hate this, I hate talking to them because all it ever does is fuck up my mental state more, I hate that he never shuts up I hate that u can't even just go sit down and cry in my room I hate all this drama and I just don't wanna be here right now,, god j u s t end me already haven't I suffered enough havent I felt bad enough yet,,
Why do I even
Fucking live
LIke if I didn't live I wouldn't feel this bad
I wouldn't have such a shitty several years I wouldn't have lived a shifty entire life if I didn't even know my life was this bad I'm sure I'd be fucking happier
I hate this. I hate everything I've fucked up. I hate every emotion I've ever even fucking felt. I hate every aspecting of even just living and I hate living here so much. It's. So dumb it's s o stupud I don't wanna be here anymore why do I have to exist why do I have to fucking live, it's not fair, it's not f u n it's not right I don't like it I don't wanna be h e r e anymore I have so many moments where I don't wanna b e h e r e why do I have to exist. Why w h y why do I have to live like what did I do to deserve this why can't I just die like,, that's so much easier then living. That's so much easier, it's so much easier to d I e why can't I die because I don't buy into any bullshit frankly. Because if god existed or even wanted me here, then why would I feel like I don't want to be here. If it's not my time to die then why do I feel awful all the time
Why would I be pushed to do something I'm not supposed to do, especially after how much I've fucked uP.
I hate living. I hate it here I hate this I h a t e t h I s
