I'm, I don't know.
I guess I've been feeling this sort of gut wrenching feeling since summer of constant hope and denial but I hadn't really expected it to come from you of all people.
You've changed a lot, since we were in middle school, we used to be so close and you pushed me off a lot but I understood because you know, you wanted to grow up. But now you're very grown up and I still feel like the same dumb kid I've been for as long as I can remember. I always feel like that.
I'm I don't know? The boys haven't aged a day , she hasn't aged a day since we were kids. I don't understand why you have just drifted.
I know we're not on bad terms but there's a distance I think,
And it kinda hurts.
I really needed this. There's not another opportunity or another time for us, and I understand you didn't mean to and your response was kinda sarcastic. Like oh wig my mom punished me because I did something to elicit it ope sorry,,,, haha : )))
It would've been nice or fun I don't know. Part of me just wants to see a familiar face before things go deeper into shit and before I get major surgery done , normally I don't mind medical stuff but the thought of someone sticking needles or handling my unconscious body is making me incredibly uncomfortable and paranoid.
It's not like we talk much anyway? We went from being tight and neighbors to... I hardly even know you or what you do these days.
I also feel like god just like screwing me over but whatever.
