Heartthrobs and Secret Admirers (A Lippa FanFiction)

Chapter Thirty-Three: First Day Back

Pippa's POV:

I'm waiting for my plane back to my hometown praying that know one recognizes who I am. After I found out I was pregnant and left Amélie I've managed to stay out of the spotlight. Expect for the night of Jasmine's wedding. Lucky the way Lin and I were sitting covered my baby bump, so only a few people even know I'm a mother now. If fans saw me carrying around a mysterious infant in an airport by myself it might raise questions.

I board the plane without any complications. Lynnette is quite the whole flight which is nice, it would only bring unwanted attention if she was fussy. During the flight I just watch her sleep. She is so much smaller than all the other babies I've seen, but I guess it's because she was premature. That's why I didn't want to even bring her on this plane.

My original plan was to fly down to Chicago, set up a nursery at my parents then drive to New York with my mom to pick up Netty. But I couldn't bring myself to go alone with the plan after what happened last night. If I come back to New York, to Lin, I don't if I could get myself to leave. It room everything in me this morning to walk out of his apartment with our daughter. But I know I'm making the right choice. I need to work on me so I can be a good mother. I can't be selfish anymore, I have someone depending on me now.

The captain announces we are landing soon and pulls me out of my thoughts, which is probably for the better. I might start crying on a crowded airplane if I think about my life anymore.

When we land I let everyone else get off the plane first. I've always done this because people are pushy in these situations, and my maternal instinct is saying to let all the pushy snobs go first so they don't disturb my sleeping child.

When I finally make my way off the plane I am greeted by both of my parents. Tears fill my eyes just by seeing them. I don't want them to look down on me or see me as a disappointment for coming back home. But I can't stay in New York anymore.

My mom must be able to read my mind, she pulls me into a tight embrace telling me everything is going to be fine and that her and my dad are still proud of me and love me.

Mom takes Netty's carrier after peaking at her sleep. "She is so beautiful. I'm so glad everything worked out and you guys got her back." I can see she is holding her tongue, probably about Lin. I ignore it, waiting for a better time to answer her questions away from public view.

We follow my dad to baggage pick up, he kindly takes my giant luggage with him to the car. I try to fasten Lynnette's carrier into the cat but my mom stops me and does it herself. "You need a break today. Let us do everything for you today. Its fine you need at least one day of rest and peace. Besides what are grandmas for." I try to laugh at her little joke but my body won't even let me produce a fake laugh.

The car ride is tense since no one is willing to break the silence knowing what to topic of the conversation would somehow turn to. Lin and our baby. I just stare out the window focusing on anything to occupy mind enough to distract my emotions. Just like I did when Lin picked me up from the party the night I walked in on him and Rachel.

"Phillipa honey, we are here." My dad says tapping my shoulder. Must have been spacing out for a while because both my luggage and Lynnette are no longer in the car.

"I'll be in a in a minute. I just need some time to myself for a minute." My dad just nods at me before closing the car door, leaving me alone. The second the door shuts I feel a tear hit my leg, then another, and another. Soon there is a steady stream pouring down my face into my lap. There is just one thing on my mind. Lin.

Did I make a mistake coming here. Should I have stuck it out for Lynnette, so she wouldn't have to grow up in a broken home. Why am I being so selfish? I should call Lin and apologize for everything, ask to come home and forget this ever happened.