If You Must

All That We Are Is Apart

Penelope

I call Micah after the two bozos leave, sitting in Simon's usual spot on the couch.

"Hello?" He picks up after the first ring. I smile at that deep, rich voice.

"Hi, Micah," I answer.

"Everything good?" I nod, even though he can't see me. Nicks and Slick, I miss him.

"Yeah-- yeah, actually. Everything's really good here. Baz finished physical therapy today, and he and Simon are going to start planning their wedding on Monday." I readjust my position on the couch, letting my head hang off the arm. I like the way our apartment looks upside-down (even if this is an incredibly Simon Snow-esque thing to do).

"That's great!" I can hear the smile in his voice. Closing my eyes, I let myself picture that smile. I don't let myself picture him like this very often-- after a while, it becomes pointless. It's like I wear out his image by going over it again and again, until all I'm left with is a ache in my chest. (Simon told me last year that he used to do that with Watford, and that he would only let himself think of all the things he missed while he was on the train back to school).

But today... I'll make an exception. Just for today.

"Do you want me to fly over there to help out?" He continues. I sit up, a grin slowly spreading across my cheeks.

"I would love that," I reply happily. I feel like there's a balloon in my chest, swelling and swelling until I can hardly breathe-- can hardly think anything but his name.

"I can't leave work until next Wednesday, is that all right?" Micah is helping with his dad's Magickal medical clinic in America, acting as a secretary/nurse super-hybrid.

"Yes! That's perfect. And Micah?"

"Yes, Penny?" His voice is so soft, it makes me wish I could find a teleportation spell.

"I have something important to talk to you about when you get here." All this craziness with Simon and Baz's wedding has made me think. About Micah. About marriage. About finding a good time-stopping spell.

"Oh?" He asks slowly. Like he's figured out all my plans. "Can you give me a clue?" I close my eyes again, smiling.

"Mmm... Nope. You'll have to work it out all by yourself," I tease. Micah chuckles.

"You're mean," he mock-pouts.

"Thank you for the complement, my dear," I shoot back. Something rustles on Micah's end, like he's sitting down.

"Hey Penny?" His voice is more serious now. Not a bad kind of serious. Just... thoughtful.

"Yes, Micah?"

"I miss you," he murmurs. Aleister fucking Crowley. Aleister Crowley and Merlin and Morgana. That little balloon in my chest is choking off all of my air, threatening to explode.

"I miss you, too," I whisper back.

"What time is it over there?" I glance at the watch on my wrist.

"About 8:00."

"I should probably go, then. Let you eat and sleep and all that." I shake my head, clutching the phone more tightly.

"No, Micah. Just..." I hear him go completely still.

"Yes, Penny?" His voice is a deep whisper that sends invisible fingers drifting down my spine.

"Just... stay." He stays silent for a moment, and I wonder if he's hung up. Just as I'm about to pull my mobile away from my ear to press the 'end call' button, he replies,

"Okay."