If You Must

All That We Are Is Married

Simon

I'm dead tired. Black spots dance in my vision if I move too quickly. My magic, for the first time I can remember, is nearly completely drained. Every bone in my body aches with the effort of standing upright.

But I'm happier than I've ever been in my entire life.

Baz hurries to the altar, and I wait next to a only slightly hacked off Penny. For a moment some of the nerves return, but I remind myself that I've already done this. While fending off a giant, evil worm and jumping between worlds, for Crowley's sake. And Baz was right; it does make me feel better.

Our song starts to play, soft and lilting and completely at odds with our hectic encounter. I loop my arm through Penny's, and she leads me down the aisle. As we pass the rows of seats, I look around at the faces, beaming at all of them. There's miss Possibelf, a smattering of students from our year, the Wellbeloves (minus Agatha, whose invitation was returned to us with return to sender message stamped in red ink on the envelope), and the Bunces on my side. Baz's family, his extended family, a couple of his Watford friends, coach Mac, and a photo of his mum on his side.

Penny and I reach the alter, standing side by side. Baz grins at me, and I beam back at him.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the presence of these witnesses to join Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch and Simon Oliver Snow in matrimony," Begins the priest, still with that same bored expression he wore throughout our entire misadventure, "which is commended to be honourable among all men; and therefore is not by any to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently, discreetly, advisedly and solemnly. Into this holy estate these two persons present now come to be joined. If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together, let them speak now or forever hold their peace."

For one eternal, tense moment, I hold my breath, waiting for someone from one of the Old Families to shout out, 'I object!'. But the crowd is silent; no one speaks. The moment passes and I release my breath again.

"Who gives this man to be wedded to this mage?" Asks the priest. Smiling brightly at me, Penny faces me.

"I give this man, Simon Snow, to be wedded to this mage, Basilton Grimm-Pitch, and support them fully in their marriage." The priest nods.

The ceremony continues, much as it did the first time (though minus the mad inter-dimensional worm-beast). And then, after what feels like only a heartbeat, for the second time today, the priest asks us,

"Do you, Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch, take Simon Oliver Snow to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

Baz's smile is soft and sweet, fangs and all. Those gold-lined silver eyes bore lovingly into mine. I feel as if my heart is going to swell from my chest. Or as if I'll melt into a puddle, right here on the altar. Or as if I'll spontaneously combust. Or possibly all three, in that order.

"I do," He says, so softly I see the audience leaning forward in their seats to catch his words. I'm grinning from ear to ear, unable to break that captivating silver gaze.

"And do you, Simon Oliver Snow, take Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

For a split millisecond, I am transported back in time. Back to every moment in my entire life where I've thought to myself, 'Aleister Crowley, I love this man'. When I kissed him at Christmas, all that time ago. Right after I killed the Mage, when he was holding me and I was crying and he was calling me a courageous fuck. Our leaver's ball. Walking through Hyde Park together. Curling into his lap in mine and Penny's flat, watching that bizarre medical show they both like so much. Our first time sharing a bed. Ice skating. Drinking hot chocolate and eating scones and watching the rain pour outside. Watching him play the violin for me. The moments flood my head until it's filled to bursting with Baz. With Baz being beautiful. Baz being happy. Baz being sad. Baz being angry. Baz looking into my eyes, his eyes liquid and quicksilver and intense.

I can't imagine my life without him. Don't want to. He is my sun, my moon, my stars, my centre of gravity, pulling me in. He is my everything, and I am so, eternally grateful to him.

There are tears in my eyes as I speak, my voice clear and perfectly audible for the first time in my entire life. I think I see Miss Possibelf smiling out of the corner of my vision.

"I do."

Baz's hand cups my cheek, his thumb brushing my lips gently. His gaze is soft and so in love, and he's just so beautiful in this moment I feel all the air leave my lungs.

"Then by the power vested in me by the grand country of Great Britain, I now pronounce you husband and husband. You may kiss the mage."

The crowd's in cheering uproar, but I ignore them completely as Baz's lips press against mine. I'm laughing and we're both crying and I think I might be in danger of growing wings again.

And even though this is our second marriage of the day, I could not be happier if I tried. Because Simon Snow is gone, and in his place stands a married mage, tall and confident and powerful and blissfully in love. Simon Snow is gone, and in his place stands Simon Grimm-Pitch, a grey-eyed vampire laughing happily in my arms.

There is no where and no one I would rather be.